My mom passed away a few days ago and this weekend was her funeral. She was TBM and of course had a typical funeral in the chapel and grave dedication at her site. Anyway, the members were very helpful and gracious. The RS were by her side when she died and helped make a lot of the arrangements for the service and dressing her in the temple clothes. After the dedication there was a welcomed lunch back at the chapel for out of town guests and such. The members there were very sweet and helpful.
On the flipside, my wife went to church the next day with the TBM relatives from out of town. She expected to see maybe something different. Not. Same old boring, robotic service. I was thinking that perhaps members can be normal, nice people, but then they go into a robitic transe when they do church stuff.

So sorry to hear about your mom. Hope you're doing well.

I'm glad to hear that her fellow church members stepped up to the plate, however.

that she had made good friends who stood by her and your family. The morg itself can't be helped.

My condolences.

I'm sorry for your loss but it's nice to know your Mom had real friends. I still think they were real friends in spite of the church, not because of the church.

We should all be so lucky to go out with real friends by or side.

at least the funeral was not a dedication to the church!! :P_)

How sad for you.

I am glad that those attending the services were kind and considerate. It's still hard but kindness can soften the blow a bit.

Take care.

Sorry for your loss...

stormy

So drilldoc, I assume you are a dentist. Sorry to hear about your mom. Sounds like the RS did a nice job, they certainly did for my granddaughter last year. The mormons are for the most part very good people, just misled , well lied to, and that makes me sad. Very sad at times.

I have 3 sons that are drilldocs, as is my general dentist ex, well one is actually an orthodontist and one an oral surgeon,and then one a general dentist and runs 3 offices here along the wasatch front.

They and their families and my 2 girls as well are all TBM, which is sometimes very hard for me. I do not care one bit if they stay in the church forever, but I would like them to be told the truth, instead of lied to by their leaders and at least have the chance to choose for themselves. That is what really bothers me.

Anyway, I just keep my mouth shut about my disbelief around them and their families ( they do know), try always to be respectful, but receive little respect , actually none, from some of the them or their spouses. It is hard at age 60 to be a grandmother of 21 and the only one in my immediate family out. I went looking for a more sure testimony at age 51 and left for good at age 56. I knew in one week it was not true, but was very frightened, and needed to make absolutely sure. I really kind of blew the family away when I told them I no longer believed, as I had always been TBM, got divorced. How did you learn the truth? Very Curious.



Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 06/14/2011 08:59PM by think4u.

I was only one of two dentists in the Stake and never saw but a few members in my office. My other involved activities outside the church brought several patients to my office - kid's soccer, dance, etc. Now mind you I was an active member and spending a lot of time at church, paying tithes, etc. Hmmm. Where should I invest my time? I think what pissed me off the most was to hear that a lot of members were going to a non-member guy's office nearby and dropping the "why don't you come to church" invitation (his hygienist was my friend). He was a little closer to the ward, but his fees were much higher and his experience was considerably less. So, consequently I spent more and more time away from church and began doing the unthinkable - reading "anti-mormon" literature. Finally one day I just dropped off the attendance roll about 5 years ago after baptising by last daughter (did it for tradition maily). Your kids situation may be different there in Utah. Turning away from the church would cause their patients to defect. In my case, it had no effect.

Wonder if there is an inverse relationship between kindness and decency of people and their church authority status. The Mormons that I find the most caring are those of the lowest rank and file. The higher up the food chain . . . well, you know what I mean.

I'm sorry to hear she's passed.
We had my MIL's funeral about a year and a half ago.....in a Mormon chapel in her hometown. Luckily the bishop allowed family members to talk about her. (there was a plan of salvation talk too)
But what was really amazing was that the family (a Lutheran niece and helpers)
were allowed to do the family meal after the dedication in the chapel cultural hall. RS didn't take charge. That surprised me.

I haven't been to any church meetings for years but felt good about MIL's service. So I understand how you must have felt with the TBM friends and RS doing this with a loving spirit.
I'm sure they loved your Mother too.

AnonyMs
N.Orange County Exmo

Thanks for all your thoughts and condolences. The Bishops that attended and spoke were nice, but kind of boring - no real personal stuff. They spoke their cookie cutter religious talk as if they were selling the church's gospel. I can understand why as when people die, religion gives people hope, so stuff about the resurrection is appropriate there, but I think we could have just had one speak. My brother's talk was similar too. In fact, my talk was the most personal and actually humorous. Other people did musical numbers and that was nice too. It's weird though I never thought about it until I attended other churches - no applause. Silly rules. No wonder the church is dying.

Sorry about your mom. And very very sorry you must remember her in Temple garb. That is just sick.