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Posted by: Becca ( )
Date: August 04, 2019 05:23AM

I rarely watch tv, but the other night I did and came across a Dutch show where the host (a lesbian) travels the world to explore what it's like to be gay in different parts of the world.

She was in Utah... commenting on the high suicide rate amongst young gays in the state. She tried to film an interview of a young photographer in front of the SLC temple. ..
Lo and security showed up really quick and told them to stop filming...

I was quite shocked at the attitude of those guys.. they were far from friendly. Threatening was be a more accurate description.. asking them for I.D. and ordering them to stop filming..

Next segment: A diner and a young woman who apparently is the face of the church in an anti gay campagne.. she is lesbian but claims God made her this way on purpose and it is her test in this life to overcome those feelings... Saying how she struggles every day with feeling lonely and longing for love, but she won't act on it because that's a sin...and she is perfectly happy and loves god and the church.... (huh??)

Then in march two missionaries... (I had forgotten how young those boys are!!) and they start giving the whole crew books of mormon... the tv show host asks them where it says in the book about the gays and none of them could point it out!!!

They also tried to talk to someone about the gay treatment centre but were stonewalled pretty harsly. Nobody was going to say anything, and they could not get near the facility with camera's..

I"ve been out of the church for 25 years.
I have been to Utah twice in my life.. (I live in the Netherlands)
I was pleased to see this exposure on tv, right after an item about being gay in China, and 2 days before the Pride Amsterdam event.

I can't quite shake the shock of it at the same time though. The attitudes, the mannerisms, the language.. and mostly the threatening demeaner of those security guys...


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Posted by: rt nli ( )
Date: August 04, 2019 07:33AM

Hi Becca, long time no see. I'm not very active in the online exmo community anymore. Hope you are doing well!

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Posted by: Becca ( )
Date: August 04, 2019 03:59PM

Hello to you too!

I'm really well thank you. how about you? I'm rarely active here but on occasion something will trigger me to come and have a chat.

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Posted by: cl2 ( )
Date: August 04, 2019 07:56AM

Sad to say I'm not surprised by how they acted. We've heard about it many times and, as far as the lesbian who feels God made her this way as a test so she can overcome the feelings, I've seen it many times in my own life, this attitude.

They want us to believe they've made huge strides. This just shows you they haven't. The only thing they've changed since I found out my boyfriend/future husband was gay is they don't say you are damned for even saying you are gay, but when you look at it in terms of what this girl had to say, they are still saying you are damned if you don't get over the feelings OR if you have a relationship. They've just changed the words (which is something they always do in difficult spots).

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Posted by: Becca ( )
Date: August 04, 2019 03:59PM

Yep they do.
word games... as if that makes it all okay...

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Posted by: Ted ( )
Date: August 05, 2019 03:26PM

Modern day really all you are seeing. Scientology has it's on version of cult-security forces.

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Posted by: Lisa von un zu Liechtenstein ( )
Date: August 05, 2019 02:59PM

What is the name of the show?

I speak Dutch, and I would like to try to find it online.

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Posted by: Becca ( )
Date: August 09, 2019 12:48AM

The show is called: How to be gay. And it was aired by the KRO-NCRV.
There is youtube clip called: Hoe is het om mormoon en gay te zijn? which is the segment about the church.

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Posted by: Pooped ( )
Date: August 05, 2019 05:22PM

Hi Becca!

I've been out of LDS, Inc. about 18 years and envy your 25 year anniversary. As a onetime convert I cannot wait to be out longer than I was in.

Just out of curiosity, I went to a presentation at my old ward here in the midwest USA. It was an "everyone is welcome" presentation by a institute teacher regarding the LDS Church stance on gays in the church. I just wanted to see where they stood officially. I was not warmly welcomed by the bishop's wife, who knew I was an apostate, but nobody else bothered me. I just wanted to listen and asked only one question.

The basic theme was that LDS, Inc. loves and welcomes the gay members of the church but they must not act gay in any way that anyone can see or it is sinning. Thus, they cannot hold hands with the same gender person, kiss, or live together even without sexual relations. My question was about holding hands being a sin and was told that, "Yes, anyone holding hands with someone of the same sex if they are gay is a sin." This seemed preposterous to me but not terribly surprising for TSCC. They never used the word gay but preferred to to call it "same sex attraction". I'm not sure why gay, lesbian, homosexual are words they frown upon.

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Posted by: cl2 ( )
Date: August 05, 2019 11:02PM

same sex attraction as they like to make it about the sex instead of about the whole person. I hate it when they say SSA or "tolerance."

So it is a sin to hold hands with someone of the same gender IF you are gay, but it is okay otherwise. Ridiculous. So they are supposed to be robots.

I did decide after reading "In Sacred Loneliness" that the church is all about LACK OF intimacy.

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Posted by: Becca ( )
Date: August 09, 2019 12:49AM

Yes exactly. It's always about the sex in the church. Sex and money.

In their eyes nothing to do with Love.

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Posted by: summer ( )
Date: August 09, 2019 10:13AM

To me, the phrase, "same sex attraction" is a way of covertly discriminating against gays. They are words of denial.

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Posted by: LJ12 ( )
Date: August 09, 2019 02:14PM

This is an astute observation. “You can hold hands with the same gender if you’re NOT gay” - Lol. Mormonism is so ridiculous. I always wondered why I never heard the words ‘gay’ or ‘homosexuality’ in LDS inc. Of course it’s not that people are born this way, they are just suffering from the wrong kind of attraction. Smh.
It took me years to get past the brainwashing that sex was wrong. (Of course once I did, I was extra glad). So I dread to think what this does to someone who is gay, whether they’re in it and denying themselves, or having to recover having realised that it’s downright evil to be even asked/expected to live in this way.
If only everyone could be free to just enjoy life. How can anyone be happy if they have to deny who they are? Of course Mormondoom does this in general to everyone who accepts it, but denying sexuality is a special type of control. It ties everyone up in knots, physically of course, but especially psychologically.

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Posted by: cl2 ( )
Date: August 09, 2019 08:56PM

I think most gays who were/are lds will live with some form of trauma the rest of their lives.

Then we talk about the parents and the spouses and the children. The pain and trauma is something you never get over. Sure, I've made a good life for myself, but I see the trauma my kids have suffered and my "husband" has suffered and I wonder WHY?

At what cost do they keep their heads in the sand? SSA is an insult. So we should call them OSA and not heterosexual. And they can't touch each other.

A young man 2 doors down, whose father was bishop not too long ago, is obviously gay. He used to come and talk to us quite a bit, but never came out to us. My TBM daughter finally asked me if I thought he is gay as he doesn't date. He is an RM and attends BYU. You can see the pain in his eyes. I wish he would talk to us about it. My nephew's son is gay and my nephew and his wife (his wife's brother is gay) are not mormon and are very supportive of him. He is thriving.

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