We wish you the best. Sometimes there is a cynical-slap-happy atmosphere and a few posters lose their good sense occasionally. Recovering is hard and life can be tough.
Since it isn't helpful, I won't say anything, except "good luck". Maybe you're in a position to make a complete separation--I hope so. You did help others of us, so thanks for your input.
I'm lucky in that I have a great therapist who is exmo. I didn't know he was exmo when I was first sent to him. He was just moving to town and the therapist from my "husband's" employer told me I could get in to see him soon as he was just moving in. He for sure looks and acts mormon. I hadn't 'a clue. He saved me. Most of the credit has to go to him. I was lucky I didn't divorce my "husband" when I had planned on it as I have his insurance. After 6 years of going to this guy, I asked him where he stood with the lds church and then he told me that he is an ex-mormon. When you have someone you can go to who GETS IT who is trained, it makes a huge difference.
I also have a lot of my family who is out. I was the most devout of any of my family and everyone was shocked when I left, so I've had an endless supply of support. It just so happens my daughter is the only TBM of any of my parents' grandchildren or great grandchildren--only active mormon of all of them. So I come here because I still deal with TBMs, but mostly I come here now out of an interest in hearing how others are doing, I get bored with my work and need a break, etc.
I wish I knew where there were good exmo therapists. The only one I know is here in Cache Valley.
The best best thing about RfM is, if it's not working, you can just step away, And come back, and step away.
Threads bringing you down? Not digging the humor? Atheists being allowed their say getting on your nerves? Overall tone of the board just...boring? You can always start your own posts about topics you care about instead of drinking a not-my-cup of humor tea. Or encourage people in their recovery with your insights. Don't like the buffet choices? Bring your own dish.
in b4 naughty video links in b4 that didn't ring my bell really in b4 I'm always going to click the link...just in case
Stillangry, I just want you to feel okay where you're at, and be available if you're dealing with cult crap. This board's been here for me A LOT. it can be a mess sometimes but it's beautiful because of all the diverse views and the openness we have embraced about speaking our truths and being honest. We are delightfully imperfect. RfM isn't going to change, nor should it. Be well.
This is not a format for everyone. different people are affected differently. As for me I take what I percieve to be of benefit and discard the rest. I wish good health and happiness to all who are dealing with these life changing issues.
stillangry Wrote: ------------------------------------------------------- > I feel like my posting here over time has hurt me > more in my journey in escaping Mormonism. I > thought this would help, but it has not. Bye.
I too had felt the same at the beginning. I had to do a combo of things to get where i am today and i am still not completely my authentic self. An internet forum is not enough in the beginning in my opinion although is helpful. You need face to face therapy every week in my opinion at the minimum, ESPECIALLY if you have been abused by family and brainwashed consistently when you were younger. Its a hard road and a long road but i think we will win the day in the end. As we are all standing outside of the psychological pit as our real selves again.
Sometimes physical distance from your abusers and all religious institutions is helpful as well. I have improved dramatically by permanent physical separation and being forced to be completely independant in all areas.
Talking about what happened will only take you so far. Acknowledgement is an awakening, not a solution.
What helped me was exploring the real world. Leaving something in the dust is not enough. I had to fill my emptiness with something good. For me it was a lot of reading on a lot of subjects which I could now look at without the Mormon colored lenses in my glasses.
There is no quick fix. Rome wasn't built in a day and neither was a healthy exmo.
I second this. Discovering the facts is the easy part. The hard part is walking the ex-mo road seriously and rebuilding yourself from ground zero. I have been reading a lot lately as well. Screen entertainment doesn't do anything for me anymore like it used to when i was younger. I don't need television to escape my abusive situation i grew up in anymore so it has served its purpose. I think reading helps my brain function a lot better because my brain did get unused for quite some time. Always wanted to read the true history of religion to see what really went down but that was considered heresy in that operation. If that operation could burn books that threatened their organization they would.