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Posted by: presleynfactsrock ( )
Date: May 03, 2021 10:15AM

Yep, Mother in Heaven by LDS gets the shaft. Hmmm...the way this celestial-parenting-paradigm gets handled and promoted by this church paints the picture of just one all important party.....THE man (of course!) getting this family business going solo.

Well, I protest! I here by declare, officially by me!, that the LDS church is guilty of gross treatment of this saintly Mother in Heaven!

Plus, I have grounds to stand on....you know, good evidence that it just could not have happened that way. The reason? Father in Heaven would have been too busy watching His Angels vs. Devils Football Games to get "into the family" business by himself. It took Mother in Heaven to pull him away and tell him it was time.

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Posted by: elderolddog ( )
Date: May 03, 2021 10:25AM

What do you think football game half-times are for?


But you're certainly correct that mormon heaven keeps getting farther and farther away from the evolving consensus of what constitutes a marriage ... of equals!

1840s Celestial Marriage comes across as portraying females, all of them, as silent, but pleasant, incubators, whose only real purpose in life is to charmingly receive their husbands' seeds.

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Posted by: Elder Berry ( )
Date: May 03, 2021 11:02AM

The Mormons take it a step further and don't even worship the their one and only offspring.

https://religionnews.com/2017/04/15/do-mormons-worship-jesus-christ/

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Posted by: scmd1 ( )
Date: May 03, 2021 10:35PM

If you accept the LDS interpretation, Jesus isn't the one and only son of Father and Mother in Heaven. He's the literal son of God and God's daughter Mary.

Bruce R. may not have represented the church's views correctly, or maybe they have changed in a church that insists that God is the same yesterday, today, and forever, and that NOTHING changes, including temple ceremonies, priesthood eligibility, polygamy,or the WoW.

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Posted by: Lot's Wife ( )
Date: May 03, 2021 10:44PM

Some early Mormon thinkers argued that Mary was one of Elohim's celestial wives before she was incarnated here, so the insemination was not sinful. I think Talmadge said that in J the C; and he hinted that perhaps Mary's relationship with Joseph was celibate.

So there.

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Posted by: slskipper ( )
Date: May 04, 2021 01:33PM

Was that before or after he took a hit of the Devil's Lettuce?

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Posted by: scmd1 ( )
Date: May 04, 2021 11:11PM

After.

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Posted by: scmd1 ( )
Date: May 04, 2021 11:38PM

So if Mary was just one of Elohim's celestial wives and Earth is perhaps populated with spirits with the same spiritual father but different spiritual mothers, it begs many questions and brings up many issues.

Just how many different spiritual mothers ARE there?

If most of us are only half-siblings in a spiritual sense, shouldn't the church change its customary "brothers and sisters" salutation to "half-brothers and half-sisters"?

Should we be making an effort to marry, mate, and procreate within
our own maternal divisions in attempt to keep spiritual bloodlines pure, or should we be more concerned with avoiding inbreeding and thus mate with those outside of our own maternal division?

Does this cast doubt on the theological authenticity of the hymn "O My Father" and Eliza R.'s account of what Brother Joseph told her about a Mother in Heaven? (Do we have any other source for a Mother in Heaven or for multiple Mothers in Heaven?) Does this revelation render the hymn obsolete or, at the very least, incomplete?

This question is rather disturbing, but if Mary is indeed one of Elohim's spiritual wives as well as an Earthling, what if Mary were her own spiritual mother/daughter? Would that be the ultimate and exponential spiritual incest?

My wife has ideas in the topic. She feels that patriarchs should stop worrying about Tribes of Israel and should instead identify everyone's spiritual mothers.

My brother-in-law suggested that Elohim had exactly seven wives - one to create spirits to originally populate each continent (the Earth is only six-thousand-or so years old, you know, and Pangaea is a myth), and that the Antarctica wife presumably had spiritual infertility of some sort. My sister-in-law suggested it was perhaps a form of spiritual PCOS. My brother-in-law thinks it was more likely that she was rebellious and failed to keep sweet, causing Elohim to hold out on her and to give her nights to the Asia wife.

ETA: It probably should read "Mother to Antarctica" and "Mother to Asia." As female (and therefore lesser according to COJCOLDS tradition) goddesses, they're merely sister wives, and subject to any designation the Great Elohim should choose to bestow upon them.



Edited 2 time(s). Last edit at 05/05/2021 12:49AM by scmd1.

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Posted by: Lot's Wife ( )
Date: May 04, 2021 11:51PM

scmd1 Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> My brother-in-law thinks it was
> more likely that she was rebellious and failed to
> keep sweet, causing Elohim to hold out on her and
> to give her nights to the Asia wife.

"The Asian wife." Haha.

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Posted by: scmd1 ( )
Date: May 05, 2021 01:37AM

There were originally only six wives.

The other wives were getting a bit old, and H.F. Elohim was growing somewhat bored (and dependent upon celestial viagra to perform), and the Earth's population was lagging due to a dearth of spirit children when Australia was finally determined to be a continent. Even though Australia already had a population, H.F. needed to make things official. He created a spiritually hot young wife to be the retroactive mother to all his Spawn in Australia.

ETA: I'm stuck at the hospital waiting to see if we have to take a patient back into the O.R. I'm bored though concerned.



Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 05/05/2021 01:41AM by scmd1.

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Posted by: Rubicon ( )
Date: May 05, 2021 02:34AM

Elohim is a plural Hebrew word for Gods. It’s not a singular word. So you could say that it’s referring to a celestial couple or a celestial harem.

That’s how I viewed it when I was in the church. The reality is whoever put the endowment ceremony together used the wrong word. The bearded God in the temple movie should be called El because that’s the singular Hebrew word for God.

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Posted by: Heartless ( )
Date: May 09, 2021 10:46AM

The plurality of wives in the heavens is clearly outlined in D&C. It is also refered to as the Law of Sarah.

As far as Mary. Wouldn't she be Gods daughter? So.... Ahhhh awkward once she gets to heaven.

Does Jesus call her mom or sis?

Side note. If sealing Egyptian royalty to each other aren't they sealing brothers and sisters as husbands and wives.

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Posted by: CrispingPin ( )
Date: May 10, 2021 01:36PM

One wife per continent, huh? What about all of the other “worlds without number” that are populated with Elohim’s spiritual children? Are the same seven wives assigned continents in every world, or does HF have “wives without number”.

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Posted by: JoeSmith666 ( )
Date: May 03, 2021 11:47AM

Given Polygamy is the Order of Heaven - discussion and worship of mother in heaven would open up a major can of worms.

WHICH MOTHER?

Most likely hundreds to choose from - even the crabby dude with the lighted pen would run out of midnight ink before he could write all the names.

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Posted by: cludgie ( )
Date: May 03, 2021 12:28PM

Yeah, well don't waste your time thinking about a "heavenly mother." Or a heavenly father, for that matter. We should all be saying our prayers to someone like David Attenborough.

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Posted by: auntsukey ( )
Date: May 10, 2021 11:07AM

Or Carl Sagan.

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Posted by: Lot's Wife ( )
Date: May 10, 2021 01:24PM

Ouch!

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Posted by: presleynfactsrock ( )
Date: May 03, 2021 12:33PM

Super fun comments.....half-time why did I not catch on to that one? WHICH MOTHER!!!! for dam sure and David Attenborough is right up there with being a GOD and GODDESS combined, he is one talented, caring, authentic human.

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Posted by: valkyriequeen ( )
Date: May 03, 2021 01:15PM

Females are treated shabbily in TSCC, so what's good for the goose is good for the gander, so to speak.

If Mother in Heaven is relegated as a silent, unimportant being, then it's good enough for us mere mortal females too.

Watching the local news, Nelson himself said he received a nighttime revelation to build yet another temple; in Ephraim, Ut.

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Posted by: Elder Berry ( )
Date: May 03, 2021 02:24PM

Nelson himself has a plurality of wives.

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Posted by: Gordon B. Stinky ( )
Date: May 03, 2021 01:37PM

Come on! Having extra sister-wife-heavenly-mothers is a blessing in disguise. Imagine if one heavenly mother had to produce all those spirit babies on her own. It's not like HF wants to have his cake and eat it too. No, he wants to lighten the load on his sweetheart! He's generously dividing the workload across all his sweet spirits.

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Posted by: Heartless ( )
Date: May 03, 2021 02:51PM

I think we all miss the point.

If you don't get what you want from heavenly father, go up a rung to His mother. Heavenly Grandma.

We all know grandmas give us anything and if we single it out to heavenly fathers mother we don't have to worry about which grandma!

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Posted by: presleynfactsrock ( )
Date: May 03, 2021 07:52PM

Heartless....hey, what's with the name as you have an amazing heart? As I am a Grandma and a Nana your compliment warms, well, my heart!

AND, you are absolutely, scientifically on to something! I think Grandma's rule the heavens!!!


P.S. I love, love, love being a Grandma, Nana, and now a GREAT-Grandma. What an absolute joy to only wipe noses when I want to, only change diapers when I so desire, and SPOIL, SPOIL those little Rugrats rotten. I get to leave their company when I choose and go home and get all the sleep I need without being interrupted (except by my dang bladder). Heaven on earth!

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Posted by: Heartless ( )
Date: May 03, 2021 09:13PM

My name comes from the fact that most medical/electrical devices can't read my heart beat.

I can't use an automated blood pressure cuff. Has to be done manually and even then it takes most nurses a few tries.

At work I had to have a coworker make copies for me as the touch screen wouldn't recognize me.

The obvious conclusion....I don't have a heart.

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Posted by: kathleen ( )
Date: May 03, 2021 09:31PM

Heartless, I hope you wear some identification that tells that. You don’t want to get zipped up in a black bag for nothin’.

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Posted by: Elder Berry ( )
Date: May 04, 2021 04:18PM

Yikes. What she said.

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Posted by: Lot's Wife ( )
Date: May 03, 2021 10:44PM

n/t

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Posted by: tractingcookies ( )
Date: May 05, 2021 01:43AM

Apparently my mother in heaven has lots of sister wives ?

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Posted by: Brother Of Jerry ( )
Date: May 09, 2021 03:11PM

Heavenly Father almost never mentions Heavenly Mother because he is embarrassed and angry to admit she filed for divorce after that whole “I drowned most of the kids” debacle. If you are the Grand Poobah of the Universe, getting dumped is a really bad look.

The divorce has been dragging on because there are hardly any lawyers in heaven. Hard to find one to hire!

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Posted by: eternal1 ( )
Date: May 10, 2021 12:03PM

The SL Tribune had this article on the subject. According to Peggy Stack, "Mormonism’s Heavenly Mother has gone mainstream."


https://www.sltrib.com/religion/2021/05/08/latter-day-saints-are/

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Posted by: tumwater ( )
Date: May 10, 2021 01:32PM

Try the RCC, the Blessed Mother is venerated almost as highly as the Trinity.

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