I "translated" D&C 132 to "modern" English just to see what it's really saying, since it was pretty hard to understand with Joseph beating around the bush. It helped me understand what a controlling douche bag he really was. I defined some of the esoteric language into the context.

It was tough doing because it's almost as the BOM. One thing is for sure, GBH was wrong when he said he didn't beleive that Mormons can become gods.

Enjoy, if you want.

D&C 132 Modern Translation:
1. Joseph, you wanted to know how I, God, let a whole bunch of ancient guys have a multiple wives and mistresses.
2. So I, God, will tell you why.
3. Get ready for what I’m going to tell you; because once I tell you this secret then you’ll be required to do it for yourself as well.
4. I’m telling you about a thing I call a “new and everlasting covenant”, and if you don’t do it, then I will send you straight to hell forever.
5. You’ll only be blessed by following what I tell you to do. To receive specific blessings there are specific commandments required.
6. I came up with the “new and everlasting covenant” to have glory, and if you don’t follow it, I’ll send you to hell.
7. Anytime people make a promise, it has to go through Joseph Smith because only he has a special power that I gave to only him. Only one person on the entire earth at a time can have this special power, and only through him can contracts like marriage carry on after dying and coming back to life.
8. God has a house of order, and not a house of confusion.
9. God won’t accept anything not done in his name.
10. God won’t take anything he doesn’t ask for.
11. God wouldn’t tell you this thing if it wasn’t the law of God.
12. You can’t live like God or with God if you don’t do what I say.
13. God doesn’t care who you are, a king or a pope, if you don’t follow my word through Joseph Smith, they will be thrown down and God will not resurrect you.
14. Everything I, God, don’t like will be destroyed.
15. If a man marries a wife they won’t be together when they die if they are married by any other power than the power I give to Joseph Smith.
16. They’ll never get married again in heaven. They will be servants to the far worthier followers of Joseph Smith.
17. These servants didn’t obey me, so they will remain damned forever, serving as angels to those who actually become gods through their obedience.
18. If a man marries a woman and promises that he’ll be with her forever, it’s not true because they weren’t married by Joseph Smith and his power. I won’t let them into my kingdom because I told them what to do and I only reward the obedient.
19. If Joseph Smith, who I gave my power to, marries a man and woman together they will be amongst the first to be resurrected. They will become gods and reign over kingdoms and powers of the universe forever. Then they can commit any sin, except for murdering an innocent person, and they will still become gods. That bond, which Joseph Smith puts on them, is so powerful that even God and his angels can’t break or renege on the promise. This blessing is to have many children throughout all eternity.
20. Then they will be gods, because they live and multiply children forever. They will be above everyone else, and everyone is subordinate to them. They will be gods because they have all power and even the mighty angels must obey and serve them.
21. However, if you don’t do this thing I’m about to tell you, I won’t make you an all-powerful god.
22. Receiving this godhood, and having an ever increasing number of children and power over others, is very hard to obtain because I’m very restrictive and demanding about obedience to me. Most people will never receive it because they don’t accept the real me or understand how I really am.
23. But if you accept me as I really am, I’ll give you power to procreate forever and complete power over others. That’s what I’m doing now, and you can do it too.
24. Eternal life is to really know and accept God and Jesus Christ, so obey this thing I tell you that you must do.
25. It’s easy to die when you don’t listen to me or do what I tell you to do.
26. If a man and woman are married by Joseph Smith, they can commit all kinds of sins, even blasphemies. If they don’t murder an innocent person, God will turn their souls over to Satan to punish them until the first part of the resurrection when they will come back to life and be made gods to have all power and be able to procreate forever.
27. If you do this thing and reject it, or speak against it, that is the only unpardonable sin. You will be cast out and be damned forever.
28. I’m God, and I’ll tell you about this law of the Holy Priesthood that’ been in existence longer than the world has existed.
29. Abraham got all his spiritual commandments this same way; by revelation. He has already been made an all powerful god, sitting on a throne just like God’s.
30. Joseph, you’re a direct descendant of the prophet Abraham, and he was given a promise that all his offspring would be like the number of stars in the sky or the sands of the beach—there would be so many of them that you couldn’t possibly count them all.
31. Joseph, God gives you that same promise because Abraham was your ancestor and he promised to obey this same secret teaching. It’s also how God is glorified by men.
32. So, do the same thing Abraham has done, have many wives and children and then you will be made a god as well.
33. If you don’t do it, you won’t be saved and you won’t become a god like Abraham.
34. God told Abraham to do it, so his wife Sarah gave her slave Hagar to him as a second wife. She did it because it was the law. Hagar had many offspring because of that coupling and it helped fulfill the promise from God to Abraham that he would have many descendants.
35. Did Abraham do anything wrong? I say “no” because I’m God, and I’m the one who told him to do it.
36. Abraham was commanded by me to murder his son for my pleasure. Even though it is already commanded somewhere else that, “thou shalt not murder”, Abraham still wanted to do it and I considered it righteousness.
37. Abraham procreated with mistresses and I counted it as righteousness as well, because I gave those mistresses to him to have children with. It was a gift for doing what I told him to do. Isaac, his son, and Jacob, his grandson, did the same thing in taking multiple wives and mistresses. So I allowed them to become gods on thrones like my own, to continue to procreate forever, and have others serve them. They are not angels, they are gods.
38. David, Solomon, Moses, and many other s have had many wives and mistresses. Men have done it since the beginning of the world, but they didn’t sin because I told them to do it.
39. I gave David all his wives and mistresses through Nathan the prophet. Other prophets also had this power. David never sinned having all those wives and mistresses until he murdered Uriah so he could sleep with his wife. David will never become a god because of that one sin.
40. I am the Master your God, and I give to Joseph Smith, Jr. the power to restore all things, including marriage to a multiplicity of wives and mistresses. Ask for anything you like to Joseph Smith, and I will give it to you.
41. Joseph, you have asked me about adultery to understand if you have committed it. If a man takes an additional wife in the “new and everlasting covenant” and she has sexual relationships with another man that I haven’t assigned her to, then that is adultery and she will be destroyed.
42. Even if she hasn’t been initiated into the secret of the “new and everlasting covenant” and she has sex with another man than that is adultery.
43. If her husband vows fidelity to his wife, but has sex with another woman then that is adultery.
44. If she hasn’t had sex with another man, and she knows it, I will tell you, Joseph Smith, the truth of it. They you can take her by the authority of the priesthood and give her to another man who hasn’t committed adultery so that the man can be blessed with many children and rule over them forever.
45. Because I have given you, Joseph Smith, all power and keys of the priesthood to reign over others I will restore every secret thing, like the plurality of wives and mistresses. I will tell you more about it later.
46. Joseph, whatever you bind together on earth will be bound together forever in heaven if you do it in my name. Whatever sin you forgive of people on earth will be recognized as being forgiven in heaven. And whoever you condemn on earth will be condemned by God in heaven.
47. Also, whoever you decided to bless, God will obey and bless them. Whoever you curse, I, God, will curse—this is true because I’m God and I say it.
48. If you, Joseph, want to give a person a gift like an additional wife, than I God will make sure it happens without condemnation in this life or in heaven.
49. I am your personal companion, Joseph Smith, in this life and in heaven for all eternity. In fact, I will promise to make you a god right now, to have eternal procreation with many wives and to have power over others. I will make you a godly throne like Abraham now has.
50. You, Joseph, have sacrificed so much to do what I tell you to do. So, I will forgive every sin you have committed. I will accept you because of your sacrifices like I accepted the sacrifices of Abraham and his son Isaac.
51. Emma Smith, your wife, shall not have extra-marital relationships as I promised to give her before. It was just a test to see if you are willing to sacrifice and let it happen.
52. However, make sure Emma Smith, my servant, accepts all those women and mistresses that I have given to you, Joseph Smith. They are virtuous and pure despite what the world may think. If they aren’t pure, they will be destroyed.
53. I am God, and you will do what I tell you to do. I give Joseph Smith power to rule over many people and many things because he has been faithful over a few things. From here on out, I will make him strong.
54. I command Emma Smith, my servant, to obey, tolerate, and stay with Joseph Smith and no other man. If Emma doesn’t do this, she will be destroyed. I am God who tells her what to do, and if she doesn’t do it, I will personally destroy her!
55. Joseph Smith said he would do anything for Emma, but if she doesn’t follow this thing I command her to do, I will still bless him with one hundred times the number of wives, families, houses, land, children, and many crowns of godhood with eternal procreation on many eternal worlds.
56. I command Emma to forgive Joseph of his wrongdoings, only then will I forgive her, because Emma has wronged me, God, and I will make her happy and a better person.
57. I say that Joseph should hold onto all his property because any enemy might come and destroy him if he doesn’t. Satan seeks to destroy him, but I will guard him as I did Abraham until I can make him an all-powerful god with eternal procreation.
58. To talk a little about the laws of the priesthood, there are many things I could say.
59. Joseph Smith has been called and given the gifts of the keys and powers just like Aaron the brother of Moses. This power is that according to me, Joseph is incapable of sin and whatever he wants to happen I will make sure it happens.
60. I don’t want anyone to say anything bad about Joseph because I will back him up, because he will sacrifice what I ask of him so that he can get rid of his wrongdoing.
61. Also, according to this law of the priesthood, if a man marries a virgin and desires to marry another one, he can have her provided she is a virgin and no other man hasn’t claimed her first. I will back up that man and not consider it a sin, and I will not count it as adultery because I gave the extra wives to him.
62. Even if I give him ten virgins, it’s not adultery and I won’t count it as sin because it falls under the law of the priesthood.
63. However, if any of the ten virgins he marries sleeps with another man, she has committed adultery and will be destroyed because they belong to him so that he can have many children. We, The Gods, promised it to him before the world was created so that he could become a god too and procreate forever and fill many worlds with the souls he fathers. I do this so God’s work of populating worlds can be fulfilled and his children will glorify him.
64. If a man has a wife and he teaches her this secret law of the priesthood, she is commanded to believe it and help him in any way to accomplish it. If she doesn’t, she will be destroyed because I God want it for the man that I might be honored.
65. I’m sure Joseph Smith will follow this new secret law since he follows everything I tell him to do, but if Emma doesn’t follow she will become the wrongdoer since she chooses not to believe it. If she doesn’t accept it, than Joseph isn’t required to have her permission or help to do it.
66. I will tell you more about this secret law later, but for now you know enough to get started. I am God, Alpha and Omega—and I say it’s true. The end.

This thread is true!

If it wasn't so scary, it would be funny as a Star Wars style crawl with Darth Vader's theme playing underneath...

I love how god talks just like JS

topping for the topper where ever they are

"I command Emma to forgive Joseph of his wrongdoings, only then will I forgive her, because Emma has wronged me, God, and I will make her happy and a better person."

That kind of thinking is very familiar to me. I was married to someone who would do something terrible and then get angry at me first before I even had a chance to say anything. I could not have any sort of reaction that implied wrongdoing on her part, and she would get angry at me first just to make sure. This verse tells Emma to not just suck it up, but that she is already on God's shitlist before she even has a chance to say anything about what Smith is doing. How has Emma wronged God? It's really crappy. There's also a carrot. If she lets Smith screw around with a bunch of other women, then God will make her a happy and better person.

D&C 132 is essentially Joe's business card, engraved in bold neon pink letters against a day-glo green background.

It says:

JOSEPH SMITH, JR.
Lecherous and Lust-Crazed Scoundrel,
Defiler of Young Maidens,
Abuser of Authority,
Cruel adulterer and -- oh yeah --
Prophet, Seer and Revelator Guy

D&C 132 really reveals all any thinking person needs to know about Joe Smith and his religious scam. And it's right there in the middle of Mormon Holy Scripture. They can't wish it away with any of their usual arguments to the effect that it's no scripture or it was just the "opinion of a man" or that we can't trust the scribes, who may have just made it up or blah, blah, blah.

Nope, it's right there in their fully canonized Doctrine & Covenants. All they can do is try to change the subject as fast as they can.

The more you analyze it, the more you see into Smith's character. It's right there in the canonized scriptures, like you said. Kudos to The Motrix for spelling it out like that. It's kind of jawdropping to read.

Section 132 is the modern “Brighimite” church in a nutshell--Controlling, angry, demanding obedience, threatening to destroy, objectifying people. etc. It’s a sick, dysfunctional, unethical, using and abusing, lying organization.
I’m glad to hear that everyone enjoyed looking at the revelation in an unvarnished way as much as I did. When I posted it, I said very little because I was pretty much taken aback by what Joseph Smith was actually saying, and how much vitriol there seems to be it. He was a very angry person at this point.
It has been an essential section to study in seminary and on a mission—and now I see why. Markurso said it really is the calling card and M.O. of Joseph Smith, and I completely agree. I wanted to peel back his language and get a straight shot at what he was saying. His use of pseudo-poetic language is a mask for what is really going on. And I agree with Gorspel Dacktrin if Mormonism were true than god is the biggest prick in the universe.
I was surprised how much of it sounds and feels like the BOM—all the going back and filling in gaps, vague language—I’m more convinced than ever that J.S. was the author of the BOM. It’s just really bad writing with a very aggressive message covered with a poetic sound.

Amazingly, most Mormons when they read this Section seem to miss one very important revelation within the revelation, namely, the fact that the practice of polygamy was INITIATED by Joseph Smith--and not by commandment of God. If a person reads D&C 132 carefully, it becomes quite clear that Joseph Smith was already screwing around with multiple women and was now asking God to tell him it was okay--AFTER THE FACT.

In short, the first two verses tell us that the revelation was given IN RESPONSE TO JOE ASKING God to let him know how screwing around with multiple women could be justified for one of God's prophets.

If Joe had not brought it up in the first place, God wouldn't have said anything and everyone in Mormondumb would have lived their lives believing that monogamy was the only righteous way to be.

Then in verse 52, we have God, again AFTER THE FACT, validating sex partners that Joe had already had relations with. God commands Emma to accept ALL the women that have already been given to Joe. God goes out of his way to include women in the past tense here.

Of course we know that no God spoke to Joseph Smith and revealed to him the nonsense now known as D&C 132. It is painfully obvious that Joe made it all up to justify his adulterous affairs. Emma obviously never believed it came from God.

But even if we ridiculously let Mormons have the benefit of the doubt on this, D&C 132 clearly shows that Joe was engaging in adulterous affairs BEFORE ever receiving any kind of revelation or commandment from God to do so. Mormons should be able to connect the dots on this, but they seem to have had the necessary parts of their brains shut off and can no longer perform such basic cognitive functions.

Gorspel Dacktrin style, great insights and wit, everything lacking in a Mormon manual.

It's not good either way you look at it - either JS is a women-chasing adulterer or God is an aggressive a-hole who just keeps threatening to destroy his children.

and not realize that something is seriously screwy in Zion (aka, the Land of the Mormonoids).

Like you said, there are really only two ways to look at it. Either Joseph Smith was a complete fraud, who used his self-proclaimed status as God's prophet to manipulate women into having sex with him and to intimidate Emma into going along with it.

OR....

God himself is a capricious perv, who gets off on seeing his appointed prophet guys having lots of sex partners for no particular reason other than that he's had his prophet guys do it in the past. Maybe 19th Century religious fanatics would find that kind of God to be impressive. But it's hard to see why 21st Century mainstream Mormons still don't see how ridiculous it is.

I mean all of my TBM friends and relatives are repulsed by the FLDS Mormons and their creepy polygamist leaders, but they can't seem to connect the dots and realize that the FLDS comes straight out of their own D&C. What? It's okay and not creepy for Joe Smith and Briggy to do it, but not for a modern FLDS guy? What's the difference? If anything, based on a strict reading, it would appear that the FLDS pervo-plygs are more courageous and faithful than the mainstream Church's General Authorities. Their livin' the D&C 132 commandment, come what may.

...were verses 19 and 26. So, once you receive the new and everlasting covenant, you can commit any sins you want, short of murder and denying the Holy Ghost, and still become a god? It's the ultimate get out of jail free card?

So, either Elohim is a sick bastard, or this "revelation" was invented by a scoundrel who wanted justification for his various acts.

What I find very interesting about this section of the D & C, is the head note before the actual text of the scripture. The head note indicates that this revelation was given to JS some ten years before he wrote it down as scripture. So far I haven't found any other section of LDS scripture that causes me to hold the whole thing more suspect than this section, and quite frankly its the head note sanctioned by the LDS Church that causes the suspicion.

Think about this for a minute. Polygamy by itself is not that big of a deal. Many cultures have practised it for centuries without batting an eye. But here you have a Christian church, supposedly teaching Christian doctrine, that sanctions polygamy; something that would be adultery under Judeo-Christian teachings. Its possible that God would command such actions, I don't think its likely, but I'm willing to say its possible.

But, if you believe JS, he was commanded to practise polygamy 10 years before he told anyone he was commanded to do so. Wouldn't God want JS to share this teaching with the flock immediately so as to save their souls. The fact that JS waits 10 years just makes one go....Hmmmmm, something smells fishy here. Add to that, the fact that JS didn't wait 10 years to jump on the polygamy bandwagon, and this doctrine becomes even more suspect. Its kinda like God said to Joe, "I want to you take many wives, you can start now, but the rest of the flock needs to wait 10 years. Oh by the way, when Emma balks, just write down this scripture...its your get out of trouble with the wife card. She either accepts or goes to hell." Say that out loud a few times...does this really sound like something that the God those of you who still follow christian teachings would say.

I think the thing that makes this doctrine even more suspect is the way the LDS church whitewashes it. Some claim JS never practised polygamy, yet the LDS records show otherwise. In addition, JS got himself killed over polygamy; he had a printing press burnt because someone called him on the practise. Some minimize polygamy as not really that important, yet this scripture says its a big deal to God. Some say polygamy was necessary because their were not enough men to go around; history shows otherwise. Anyway you look at it, this scripture embodies many of the contradictions one would find in LDS Scriptures.

Thanks for posting that and thanks to the posters who made great comments. This has always seemed like a big smoking gun to me, along with all the temple B.S. It's just so obviously made up and un-Christian.

Interesting thread -- Motrix, your translation is a great read. I'd like to type it up, of course laminate it, and use it as a bookmark for my scriptures.