The announcer chirpily says the following:

“You’re Christian, you’re single and you’re looking for a meaningful relationship.

"Find God’s match for you at christianmingle.com.

"It's easy and it's free. Start browsing millions of profiles on the leading site for Christian dating.

"If you’re hoping to build a Christ-centered relationship, log on to christianmingle.com today. Sometimes we wait for God to make the next move, when God is saying ‘It’s your time to act! The next move is yours.'"

Here's God's ad:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HBqEd7JWLoY
_____


I'd like to propose an alternative ad:

"You're atheist, you're single and you're looking for a meaningful relationship.

"Find your match for you by gettng off your rear, putting it in gear and going out in the world to mingle with humanity on your own terms, at getalife.com (and, no, not that insurance website; the other one for people wanting to get a grip on reality).

"It might be easy, it might not. Who knows? You get out of it what you put into it. You're free to give it a try. So stop with your millions of excuses. Quit waiting around for some Jumbo Jesus to help you. Show some initiative. Take the lead by asking someone out on a date. I mean, for chrissakes, how hard is that?

"If you're hoping to build a real relationship with a real person, go to getalife.com today.

"Sometimes we wait for some imaginary Sky Daddy to make the next move, when you should be saying to yourself, 'It's time for me to act on my own. There is no God. The next move is mine, gawddammit!'"

Heh. What are the chances you'd see THAT on TV?

In the meantime, here's a hilarious spoof on that goofy Christian God singles pitch:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BbP8qlfssnM



Edited 30 time(s). Last edit at 07/16/2011 04:15PM by steve benson.

Welcome to my world in the South. Christian matchmakers. Christian auto repair. Christian schools. God wants to help you micromanage every detail of your life!

Funny how God (the tornado dude) loves you enough to help you find a soul mate.

Here's what I think it is really about. Announcing your business is Christian oriented is their code for implying they have higher standards. If you find a Christian matchmaker, you will no doubt find a higher caliber of person who is honest, has faith, and is also (like you) one of Jesus' special pets.

To outsiders it comes across as narrow minded, self righteous, and exclusionary. The last thing I would associate "Christian" anything with is honesty or superior results. Even worse, I sometimes question their ability to sort facts which could impact the service I expect from them. (Of course they would question my morals from the mere mention of the A word.)

Or maybe it is simply just marketing to what they see as a large demographic with particular beliefs (follow the money). It seems to work around here. This is no different than any other group like Mormons or atheists wanting to find similar types.

Recently I went to a local BBQ place called Brother Zekes. I don't know what I expected, but the theme of the place was supposed to be based on old time religious revivals: praying, praising, and serving a BBQ meal to the attendees. All I could think of was Neil Diamond's Brother Loves Traveling Salvation Show. I probably won't go back. Praising Jesus didn't seem to make the BBQ sauce particularly divine.

Edited 3 time(s). Last edit at 07/16/2011 05:48PM by steve benson.

If God would stop effing around with matchmaking for Christians maybe He would have time to save children and old people from tornados.

But then He has always been obsessed with "mingling," so I don't think we can expect to benefit from Him shifting his attention any time soon.

...and for those who want Chirstian casual hook-ups:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Nc9rrLq_P6g&NR=1