So, interesting weekend. First I got a call Sat from my 12 year old daughters "Sunday School" teacher. My daughter has not attended church since she was 3 (and we haven't been bothered). The teacher said he was new in the ward, but wanted to call everyone on his class list.He ended his introduction with'"will we be seeing XXXX tomorrow at church? I said, "No. She hasn't attened since she was 3 and neither had I. I told him we were not interested in coming to church, ever. He asked if I wanted his phone # in case I ever needed anything. I told him no, I am well connected if that was ever to occur. ASked if he knew xxxx in his ward, who is my brother. He said he was too new and didn't really no anyone. Chatted for a couple of minutes.

Anyway, we ended the conversation and he thanked me for being so cordial. Stated he never knew what he was getting into when he made such calls. Told him to have a good day and hung up.End of story...I thought.

Sunday, having a family dinner (many cars in the drive-obvious we had company). In the backyard and one of the kids told me someone went to the front door.So I go around front and there is a cute little boy with a plate of brownies.Cute boy says, "I am in xxxx SS class and we are trying to get our class mates to come back to church. He then pulls out a BOM and offers it to me! I said, "Julie is not coming to church. You can keep your book and started walking away. He said, "well here are some brownies.I told him to keep the brownies too. Take them to the next house on the list." First he looked scared and nervous, then about ready to cry. No adult ever appeared, they sat in the car.

Hopefully that is the end, but a good example of why you can't be nice!!

They teach stalking young. No wonder the adults think it's okay, they grew up helping Mommy and Daddy "bring lost sheep back into the fold".

And of course there's the manipulation/guilt tripping of turnig down a cute little boy. Or so they think.

And the whole BOM ploy seemed like they were "practicing" being a missionary.He looked very young but if he was in my daughters class must have been 11-12. But if he was the SS teachers son I guess he could have been younger.

Not the safest thing either. I have 2 large dogs that beat me to the front door. The little boy was taken aback. He recovered quickly since there are friendly dogs. But it is a bit intimidating to see these 2 big fur balls running toward you.

Just sent in electronic resignation. Included minor children, but some sites say you need to include minor children sigs. So, I guess we will see!

Parents have freedom in the US to determine church affiliation for their children.

Since minor children (under the age of 18) do not have the legal capacity to sign binding contracts their signatures are, essentially, worthless, hence no need for the signature. Parents make decisions for them. I stated that clearly in my family resignation (it only contained my wife's and my signature).

Well, to muddle stuff further, I included my 21 year old's name who has Down syndrome. I included that I have legal guardianship but we will see.

I was going to suggest it, but wasn't sure if you were ready for it yet.

I feel sorry for the kid that was sent to your door. You were nice to him, but the church shouldn't be sending out kids to do adults' business.

I was waiting to resign because of family issues. Was waiting until my mother was no longer around, but oh, well.

I knew as long as we were on the record, we might get contact. Cards have been sent etc and I just toss them-no biggie. The thing here was, that I told him we were not interested. XXX would not be coming to church. I don't need your phone #. etc. He THANKED me for being cordial- And then specifically went against my wishes.GRRR



Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 07/18/2011 10:51AM by ladybug.

You told the adult "NO." So he pulled out the morg's most cowardly ploy of sending a baby faced kid to do the hardsell. And with brownies no less!

Perhaps an assertive message to the bish, "Kindly call the mormon dogs off my minor child. Harassing her doesn't make me want to take her to your church. Thanks."



Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 07/18/2011 10:45AM by Cheryl.

LOL, I actually put a letter in the mail to bish saying just that. Any contact via,mail,phone, or visit to minor children will result in filing of a restraining order. Also, included the info that resignation was sent today-so we are no longer members.

it would add context for the OP to tell where they live...

a zip code, a state-city-county (or even country other than the U.S.) would help readers understand.

(as I said earlier in another thread) Nothing SCREAMS CULT louder than the insistence that people participate/whining when people want to bail.

Indianapolis,IN

The SS teacher indicated he was new in the ward and mentioned he was in school. We gets lots of school transfers due to IU medical center. It would be sorta interesting to know where HE came from.



Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 07/18/2011 10:56AM by ladybug.

'Cute boy says, "I am in xxxx SS class and we are trying to get our class mates to come back to church. He then pulls out a BOM and offers it to me!'

At that point, I would have looked around for the car that he arrived in, and approached the parents/adults in the car for the remainder of the conversation.

I wish I would have, really.... In hind sight, I would do exactly that.

Definitely walked the boy to the car and confronted the parent who sent a child to stalk you.

Could have been a very nice cordial conversation that explained to the parent that their behavior could be considered stalking.

I was nice when the man from SLC called and wanted my twenty-four year old son's phone number. I told him it was not lawful for me to give it to him with out my adult son's permission. The SLC TBM was surprised. So many TBMs who are 'being nice' (according to their teachings of reaching the lost sheep) have not any idea that they are stalking... It is okay to remind them.
I'd be so curious to see the 'newcomer' to the ward who would send a child to see me!!! Want to be able to pick him out in a crowd if I needed to in the future. Maybe you live in a bigger town than I do.

I'm so glad you were nice to the kid!!!! He deserved it. He'd been put up to it and it wasn't his idea!

This is typical of how the young kids are taught and used. He probably was told by his parents or the bishop,,it was his "calling" to get this other child back in the fold. I'm sure that he will be shamed and reminded of his failure for his efforts. Since they are told from birth they are special and better than the nomembers,,what do you expect?

While I do not blame anyone for accepting free homemade cookies/brownies (yum!), if the greater desire is to communicate, “GO AWAY, we are NOT interested!” then turning down the homemade goodies is one of the most effective ways.

LOl. Yeah, we have monthy family dinners. I have 5 kids and 3 grandkids so about 15 people here in all. (which irks me too-there were enough cars in the drive they knew we had company).The kids were in the back playing football. When I told them what happened they playfully harassed me for not taking the brownies.But I felt a clearer message was being sent to NOt accept them. Besides we had a giant, yummy chocolate cake waiting for us.

"I mean it when I say I'm not interested and cheap unwanted gifts won't make me change my mind."

One of the things I love about this place is that it's helping me to build my "tool box" to prepare for when things like this happen.

I'm sorry you had this experience, but hopefully by posting here people will read the responses and be ready for when similar things happen to them. I now have the idea that should it happen to me, I should probably approach the car and inform the parent/teacher that I feel it was rude of them to try and manipulate me with by using a child to do their dirty work... I don't think I would have thought of it if it happened out of the blue...

Anyway, thanks for posting your story... I hope your resignation goes well... My Wife and I are kind of taking the same tactic of "if they don't both us, we won't bother them" mainly because it would be quiet the argument with my parents, and I'm not ready for that... but I would resign at the drop of a hat if someone pulled what they did to you on us...

Thanks again...

My heart really goes out to that 12-year-old who was at the front door with the brownies. He must've been with some really fucked up adults! GGRRRRRR

If I were the 12 year old boy, those brownies would have never made it back to the car even if you didn't want 'em.

Just sayin'...

Ron

+1

My brother bought my parents' house when they relocated to a different city. For years and years he endured unwanted contact from the lds. When he indicated that he wasn't interested in resuming his involvement with the church, they invariably asked for my contact info, or our brother's. Hello! If he wasn't interested, why would he sick them on us? It only ended when I found this site, and learned how to resign. Which we both did, several years ago.

BTW, I have thanked him profusely for "taking one for the team" all those years... ;-)

I think I would have gone a little easier on the poor kid. A little walk to the waiting car might have been more in order. I was once that little kid, so I kinda feel for the boy.

+1 If I was thinking ahead, that's what I would have done....