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Posted by: anybody ( )
Date: October 30, 2023 11:11AM

Is this what finally drove the latest doomsday mom over the edge and sell everything to go to Alaska?


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https://www.theguardian.com/world/2023/oct/30/us-evangelical-christians-israel-hamas-war

One strand of evangelical theology holds that the return of Jews to the region starts the clock ticking on a seven-year armageddon, after which Jesus Christ will return

John Hagee, an evangelical pastor and influential founder of Christians United for Israel, explained the prophecy to TBN Networks in December 2022.

“God is getting ready to defend Israel in such a supernatural way it’s going to take the breath out of the lungs of the dictators on planet Earth but we are living on the cusp of the greatest most supernatural series of events the world has ever seen ready or not.”

Hagee said when Jewish people are present in Israel “the clock starts ticking” on the rapture.

“What will come soon [is] the anti-Christ and his seven year empire that will be destroyed in the battle of armageddon. Then Jesus Christ will set up his throne in the city of Jerusalem. He will establish a kingdom that will never end,” Hagee said


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Posted by: bradley ( )
Date: October 30, 2023 01:35PM

Jesus wanted the throne?

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Posted by: Rubicon ( )
Date: October 31, 2023 03:06PM

Does Howdy Doody have wooden balls?

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Posted by: summer ( )
Date: October 31, 2023 04:40PM

Probably, but the fundies will take pretty much anything as a sign.

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Posted by: moehoward ( )
Date: October 31, 2023 05:12PM

Just show us a sign...
https://youtu.be/8Z3N3KquVJY

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Posted by: anybody ( )
Date: October 31, 2023 09:28PM


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Posted by: GNPE ( )
Date: November 27, 2023 12:42AM

certain phases/appearances of most celestial bodies (stars, planets, etc.)

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Posted by: bradley ( )
Date: October 31, 2023 11:02PM

It takes their mind off the economy.

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Posted by: Lot's Wife ( )
Date: October 31, 2023 11:17PM

The US economy is growing at 4.9% right now.

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Posted by: bradley ( )
Date: October 31, 2023 11:26PM

I stuck a fork in the books. They're done.

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Posted by: bradley ( )
Date: October 31, 2023 11:42PM


Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 10/31/2023 11:42PM by bradley.

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Posted by: Lot's Wife ( )
Date: November 01, 2023 12:05AM

If the data doesn't fit one's preconceptions, something has to give.

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Posted by: slskipper ( )
Date: October 31, 2023 11:12PM

Absolutely it does. There hasn't been anything this exciting in decades.

The alternative is a dull and boring sameness to their lives. They cannot survive on serenity.

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Posted by: bradley ( )
Date: October 31, 2023 11:50PM

It sure would be a dick move if Jesus lets them down again.

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Posted by: Human ( )
Date: November 01, 2023 01:28AM

“War in Gaza”?!?!

Jesus Christ. Seriously.

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Posted by: bradley ( )
Date: November 14, 2023 01:41AM

It's like the war in Heaven. A third of the host of Heaven happened to be in the wrong place at the wrong time. The flood wasn't the first time God decided He wanted a reboot.

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Posted by: Occasional Visitor ( )
Date: November 09, 2023 05:15PM

I doubt the return of Jesus, but I'd be very surprised if in the next 5 years we don't see a larger more wide spread nuclear war than the one that impacted Japan.

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Posted by: Mormon Adjacent Lurker ( )
Date: November 13, 2023 08:37PM

The End Time Crazies will get worked up that Jesus is coming because the day ends with the letter “y”. It’s been 2000 years, give or take, Jesus isn’t coming. He’s not even breathing heavy.

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Posted by: squirrley ( )
Date: November 16, 2023 03:37PM

Too bad Jesus or the space ship doesn't ever come. Jesus is too busy making business plans at the Mother Ship on North Temple. If there is a Jesus he clerrly could care less about his "children."

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Posted by: summer ( )
Date: November 16, 2023 05:41PM

The only people that he took a positive, sustained interest in during his lifetime were the poor Jews of the countryside, who were taking it on the chin both spiritually and financially at the hands of both the Jewish power structure and the Romans.

If Jesus was powerless to come back to help his people during the Holocaust, I don't see any reason why he would come back now or in the future.

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Posted by: XY Chromosome ( )
Date: November 27, 2023 12:02AM

The creation of nuclear weapons makes me think "the end" is coming, say in the next few decades or so.

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Posted by: lousyleper ( )
Date: November 27, 2023 12:39AM

My mom has agreed with this line of thinking. Nukes will take out all species on the planet, radioactive activity plus supersize roaches will make sure we are eaten and made into fertilizer. There's yer Armageddon folks. Death and monster roaches. For 1000 years.



Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 11/27/2023 12:43AM by lousyleper.

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Posted by: anybody ( )
Date: November 27, 2023 08:59AM


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Posted by: bradley ( )
Date: November 27, 2023 10:40AM

Hold on, baby!

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Posted by: lousyleper ( )
Date: November 27, 2023 04:23PM

That is exactly how it ends.., human food for roaches..... There will be no escape.

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Posted by: Rubicon ( )
Date: November 27, 2023 10:59AM

My uncle and my father in law both worked on nuclear weapons and their deliver systems. Both said we were one mad man from going back to hunter’s and gather’s. Both worked lots of overtime making sure the US had first launch capability.

I’m actually amazed we haven’t used nukes since World War II. There’s been more than one US President who once they got briefed on what the destructive power capability really is that said we need to figure out how to get rid of these things. Of course that would require an international treaty several countries would have to be honest in following. Good luck with that.

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Posted by: Kentish ( )
Date: November 27, 2023 03:59PM

Most "end times crazies" believe much more has to happen first.

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