I've been thinking lately about some of the absurd experiences I've had while still a member of TSCC. Unlike my family, most Mormons seemed to have large families with family reunions being a big part of the Mormon experience.

About five years ago I was going through a rough patch and finally confided my inner most feelings to a co-worker, who was a bishop and someone I considered a friend. I explained that many of my family members were, at that time, not getting along very well and that I was the only one that everyone still got along with. This was bothering me because I loved them all and I was hoping for some advice on how to handle this troubling family situation.

My friend's advice was to repeat something his talk radio hero, Dr. Laura, had given. Apparently Dr. Laura was at that time not speaking to her own mother and giving advice to people that if one could not get along with family members it might be time to just cut yourself off from them as she had done.

I was floored at this advice from a BIC Mormon. I was a convert and loved my family even though most of them were not LDS. I think the fact that my family was basically non-LDS made him think this advice was sound.

In the end I moved far away from Utah, resighned my membership from the COJCOLDS, reconnected with all my family members, and helped everyone get back on track. My family is now all very solidly and happily connectted. We are all doing great and none of us is active in Mormonism.

So much for priesthood revelations and "Family First" theology or rather propoganda. Family first is more of an advertising message than a reality in TSCC. Atheism is working better for me and mine thank you very much.

I'm glad you listened to your heart and put your family first. Putting my family first also helped lead me out of the church.

"I was a convert and loved my family even though most of them were not LDS. I think the fact that my family was basically non-LDS made him think this advice was sound."

I was too and I found this attitude to be pretty prevalent. It's almost as if, to mormons, your baptism means you've disowned your family of origin and washed away all emotion or affection you might have ever felt. Like, your family are no longer real people just because you became a mormon.

It's the stupidest mindset ever, but it definitely works the other way. When a BIC mormon leaves the church, their BIC family will often act like you've ceased being a person. That way they can justify treating people who aren't mormon like crap.

I was always expected to do stuff with my stepmom because she was the mormon. Nobody ever once asked me about my birth mom or suggested I invite her to some mommy-daughter event. Once I was shopping with my mom at the mall and I ran into one of the other YW. I introduced my mom. She looked at me with this great sadness on her face, like I would be dragged down to hell for hanging out with my own mother just because she wasn't mormon.

Or she could have been really sad because she was 18, freshly married, and I was a sophomore in college and living the dream. I'm not sure which. But my point is I'd gone to church with this girl for years and she seemed surprised to discover that I HAVE A REAL MOM! Who loves me! And doesn't have horns growing out of her head!