So my parents joined the church when I was pretty young - like 3 or something. I have two older brothers. I stopped going when I was about 15 or so as my parents sort of stopped going too. My oldest brother went on a mission but my second oldest brother didn't. I have a wife and two kids now. I'm almost ready to send my membership removal letter. I hope to do that this week. Tired of getting harassed to come back and having missionaries showing up at the door knowing full well I used to be active at some point in my life. I've been inactive for many many years now but I can't help but think there's still something affecting me from this even to this day. I don't know what though.

I've been reading the following page a few times until I can seem to understand it as well as I want to. It's hard to read that much and not only retain it but put it into practice.

http://members.shaw.ca/blair_watson/

The problem is that some of the things I can't seem to even wrap my head around although I'd love to be able to.

Does anyone know of any ways to start me off in identifing what isn't 'right' in your own belief system when you are raised in this church? I have some pretty serious self-esteem problems I can't seem to work through.

Thanks for reading. :-)

First, you know you are not alone. This is what is working for me:

Seek the truth
Read, study, think on the truth
Breathe
Identify one thing that you love doing and do it

I also found that Hatha Yoga and meditation helped.

Do you have the means to go to a good therapist?

You have to remove a life time of conditioning. I know the Morg is false and I still get knee jerk reactions to certain things.

I seek out facts to replace the nonsense I was fed.

It looks like a good web site, and I suggest you go back and revisit it in a few months. In the mean time, you need to find out what you think. I wont lie. It's not easy, but it's kind of an adventure in finding yourself. We've all been there, and you'll be glad you did it!