Posted by:
munchybotaz
(
)
Date: September 11, 2011 01:07PM
I wrote and first posted this two or three years ago. I've since learned that people getting taller is due not to evolution but better nutrition, so I need a new #10.
TOP TEN REASONS WHY I'M AN ATHEIST (IF ANYONE CARES)
Excuse me while I have what some will surely call an atheist-missionary moment. Those who remember me coming on the board a couple years ago, asking what’s so flippin’ interesting about being an atheist, please just give me a break. I still don’t think it’s all that interesting, but I’m finding it’s becoming more important to me as time goes on.
My intention is not to argue, but to share.
Someone last night said people slide into atheism because they’re hurt or because of a life-changing event, like death, and I just wanted to outline some of my personal reasons. Others do a fine job—better than I could ever hope to do—with the science. I’ve always said it’s obvious—since I became an atheist, I mean. Here are some reasons it’s obvious to me:
#1 – BRAIN IN HEAD
My brain is in my head, along with my eyes (which are partly on the outside), and that is why I feel like I’m inside my body, looking out—not because I’m really some fluffy cloud personality that was pumped into this body some time before my body was born and, when it dies, will be sucked out by a giant invisible cosmic vacuum and propelled to places unknown.
#2 – DREAMS
Wow! Look what my brain does when I’m asleep. I can go to places I’ve never been, sometimes by flying ... talk to dead people ... drive a car from the back seat ... have sex with celebrities, and so what if it’s Drew Carey in a big inner tube. I can even leave my body! I know this because I spent quite a bit of time trying during my la-di-da/one-with-the-universe phase, also known as “before the Prozac wore off.” Unfortunately, I was only able to do it in my sleep.
I understand that these things are not actually happening and are not going to happen anywhere but in my sleep.
I also know that my brain can trick me into thinking I’m awake when I’m actually asleep. Just yesterday morning, I awoke (I thought) to someone pounding on the door—so hard that it shook my bed. Realizing I had been asleep (because the actual waking up seemed to take a long time and felt really weird), I got up and checked the door anyway. My son, who was already up, assured me that no one had knocked on the door or made any other noise.
What my brain can do is, to me, powerful evidence that this is all there is. Someone else, a long time ago, just forgot to notice they weren’t awake.
#3 – ANIMALS
They’re made of the same stuff that we are, and have many of the same basic structures. Clearly, the ones who are bigger than, say, a mouse also have consciousness and individual personalities. For all I know, even bugs have consciousness and something like a personality.
Some might say all the similarity (and dissimilarity) of creatures is evidence of a creator, but I think it’s evidence of natural, uncontrolled evolution. The fact that we call them creatures is not evidence that they were created.
#4 – THE WAY THE WORLD IS
If a super-intelligent, all-powerful being had created all of this on purpose, I’m sure it would have done a better job. Things would be more efficient, and less gross and painful and prone to sudden destruction. There would be no menstruation, for example.
This is not the work of a genius.
#5 – INVISIBLE THINGS
Of all the things that were once invisible but we’ve since developed the technology to see, is there a single one that can’t be explained, at least in theory, and doesn’t operate in accordance with known laws of physics? Nope! I think this means we’re not likely to discover any new invisible things that don’t operate in accordance with known laws of physics, or for which the known laws can’t be amended or expanded.
#6 – THE BIBLE
Hello, it’s a collection of impossible stories. If people ever lived to be 900 years old, if God ever spoke to anyone from a bush or the sky or anywhere, or if any of the incredible things in the Bible ever really happened, those things would still be happening.
And how much sense does it make, really, that a single god-guy would have to suffer a horrible bloody death in order to make up for billions of people’s mostly intangible sins and enable them to go to heaven? Is there a physical law that seems to support that? No. Never mind that the inventor of such a procedure would have to be one sadistic mofo.
#7 – ORGANIZED RELIGION
Funny how most religions have like these ruling councils who decide how things are and what’s okay to think and do, and the members of these councils tend to be wealthy or at least well taken care of. That’s because religion is a tool for acquiring and maintaining power and controlling resources. It’s based on greed and ambition, not God.
#8 – THAT TINGLY SENSATION THAT TELLS YOU SOMETHING IS TRUE
You know those little shivers or chills that happen whenever someone says something you really want to believe, that Mormons think is the Holy Ghost? It was demonstrated to me in the most powerful way possible that these do not come from an external source but are instead the creation of my very own amazing little brain.
About 11 years ago, as the Prozac was wearing off, I met a guy in Yahoo! chat room and had what I thought would be the great love affair of all time. For three months I walked around on the verge of a full-body orgasm, tingling all over. It was so intense, I thought there was no way it could be anything but confirmation from the universe that this guy and I were supposed to be together. I had a dream where he told me we had first *mated* in the year 1732 and became convinced I had known him in a past life.
It didn’t help that the previous summer, a fortune teller at the local motorcycle rally had told me I’d meet a man.
“You will cross paths with a gentleman,” she said. “He has a lotta problems—lotta problems, with the drinking and the drugs. But he’s a good man. It’s because of his problems that he does the drinking and the drugs. I can’t see if it will be a relationship. You don’t know him now, or you might know him at a distance.”
“He’s a good man,” she kept saying, over and over. “You’re supposed to help him.”
I thought she might be talking about my former best friend, an alcoholic who once had a drug problem. His alcoholism made it hard to be his friend. We had a gradual falling out, and he hadn’t spoken to me in a couple of years. He ignored me when I passed him on the road or in the grocery store. So you could say I knew him at a distance. It’s hard to help someone who won’t talk to you, I thought.
I didn’t necessarily believe anything the fortune teller said, but I definitely wanted to. She also said I’d have my own business. I didn’t believe that because I was happily employed at the time.
Six months later I had quit my job, built a website to attract my own clients, and was tinkering around online when I wandered into the chat room and met this guy. Here was someone I knew at a distance. After establishing (I thought) that the drinking and the drugs were in his past and he wasn’t the guy with the problems, I invited him to come live with me and be my love.
Thus began 22 months of hell ending in near financial ruin. So many problems I had never imagined! And it wasn’t just the drinking and the drugs. Dude turned out to be the worst person I’ve ever personally known. Someone else’s runaway husband, deadbeat father of seven, petty criminal, vicious verbal abuser, promiscuous closet homosexual, professional work avoider, faker of a variety of diseases except for one that I didn’t know about and he tried to share. I practically had to pick him up and put him in the car to make him go away.
I haven’t had so much as a single tiny tingle since. It was not the universe but just me, wanting to be loved.
And no, I did not slide into atheism because I was hurt or even because I had a major life-changing experience. I hadn’t believed in the man-god for at least 20 years, if I ever did, and was just on the tail end of this la-di-da/one-with-the-universe phase. Only that ended with the internet romance disaster. I didn’t actually decide and start saying I’m an atheist until a few years after the universe was taken out of the equation.
So for me it was more like a process of elimination.
#9 – MY MORMON-HATING ATHEIST GRANDPA WITH THE PINK CAR
My mother’s father, who died when I was 11, was the eldest son of a staunch Mormon family. I don’t know what happened with the church, but he hated it and became an atheist some time before my mother was born. I can’t ask her too much about Grandpa because she married a Mormon and then became one to piss him off, won’t admit it, and assumes I’m trying to start an argument if I ask about anything before about 1980.
I have to give Grandpa some credit because he was first to suggest to me that there’s no god. I don’t remember exactly how he said it, but I know he said it often and I thought he might be right. My parents (who had a problem with atheists) discussed whether he was really an atheist or an agnostic, but it seems to me he was pretty adamant.
And yes, he had a pink car.
#10 – SIX-FOOT WOMEN
Speaking of evolution, it makes sense. And it’s happening before our eyes. Have you noticed people getting taller in your lifetime?
Being a 6-foot woman, I pay a lot of attention to people’s height. Actually, I’m closer to 6'1" but it’s not worth saying “six feet and three quarters of an inch,” so I just say I’m 6'1". Thirty years ago, I knew two other six-foot women and never saw a woman taller than I was. Now I know several 6-foot women and see women who are taller than I am fairly often ... a couple times a year, at least. They are always younger than I am.
I used to have a hard time finding clothes and shoes in normal stores, but now it’s a lot easier. I buy a lot of things from this online outfit called Long Elegant Legs, and I always have to hem up the sleeves and pant legs. The sleeves go halfway down my fingers. I could sew the leg openings shut and wear the pants as footie pajamas ... and that's just the 36" inseams. They also have 39"!
I’d like to see the women who can wear these things out of the box. I know they exist because, if I don’t order my stuff soon after the catalog comes out, the cute stuff is only available in sizes 4 and 6.
The 6-foot women are out there!
And if there was a god, he/she/it would make more 7-foot men.
:-)
Edited 2 time(s). Last edit at 09/11/2011 01:58PM by munchybotaz.