If you have no money and live with parents who do have money, you are in a very vulnerable position. Think about when you were still in your early teens. Did you ever question the Church? I mean SERIOUSLY question it? Chances are that you just went with the flow, going to church like everybody else.

Economic dependence is also a problem with things such as sexual abuse, where the victim often just goes with the flow, since the victim is economically dependent.

Economic dependence is probably even worse for unbelievers than it is for abuse victims, since abuse victims can always escape and find a shelter that is socially acceptable, while unbelievers cannot escape and find a shelter that is socially acceptable.



Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 10/10/2011 01:22PM by behindcurtain.

However, you weaken your statement by comparing types of abuse for "worstness." Abuse is demeaning and degrading, period. I think it's very important to realize that economic dependence is not good for a person and to strive to be as independent as one can be.

And get away from any and all abuse as soon as one is able.

I totally agree with you "behind curtain" although the abuse one takes from questioning the church is no less abuse than being hit and any shelter will help you. I know, I've been in this situation and I've lived in 2 shelters.

The church tells women, yea, COMMANDS women to give up their education and to get married and start having kids while their husbands are in college. Finances could not be in a more vulnerable position and now she is pregnant. The church fully expects women to be dependent on their husbands and expects the fear that comes with it. Easier to keep people in line that way.

Even if you do not marry, you've still spent 8 years in YW and it takes some real time to undo the brainwashing that it is really ok to make money, to have a career and to leave the church.

So let's say you are in your early twenties and still living at home and working a barely over min wage job and you start waking up to the church. You attempt to talk to your family about it...alarm bells go off and suddenly you are asked to move out...to where exactly? They've crippled you for years and now you are just magically supposed to know how to make it out there in the world alone? Yeah, real nice. Not.

How in the frick do Mormons expect to want to spend eternity with people they they don't even want to be around now? The whole family "concept" in the church is sickening. It's all about brainwashing and disempowering your children. Then blaming them if they stumble on their way into adulthood. Period. Mormon parents never take any responsibility...because they never did from birth. They let the church raise their kids, not them.

I hear you.

Lori

Precede this with if any minor, child or infant is involved this does not apply. Babies need their nutritional, medical and love needs met every instant.

If you are 18-20, there can be some very tough months, even beling hungry at times. It is survivable. It can involve living in a vehicle (because mom doesn't have a spare couch and dad is living with GF and her kids), the family home is gone and there you are. On the street. It's not the end but it can be pretty scary. I sought out kids my age, worked at restaurants bussing tables, lived on a boat for a while, slept in the cab of a truck for a while...and you know what? I survived it. I'm not scared of that situation anymore and appreciate everything I have now. Let the folks try a guilt trip on me! Good luck with that. They were so self-absorbed that they were in denial of my living situation. One classmate slept in a dorm stairwell for an entire semester. He graduated. He is a dentist now.

Fast forward. Went to JR College, working 3 jobs, got my BS then my healthcare degree, took out some loans and now, well I make a good living. Enough that my niece will never worry about anything other than her college work if she lives with me (and sig other).

It's scary, but leaping out on your own is not that scary of a risk if you maintain friendships with long time friends. Had I tried to find a safe way I might not have found my real way, and I so hate borrowing money that working those jobs was not a big deal. Socially, I guess I missed out on stuff.

Problem is, it was easy for me to find restaurant jobs a while ago. It's tougher now.