Every Mormon family I have ever known in my entire life had family "rules" governing how they must "keep the Sabbath Day holy". Yet every family's rules were different. No two families appear to interpret the commandment in the same way.

TV or no TV?
Music?
Family activities?
Going out?

And the other thing I have noticed in my own family, is that the rules are adaptable and changeable (something they must have subliminally learned from the church leadership).

"NO TV"! (Except when my favourite sports team is playing)

(...then 10 years later it has become "No TV until late evening when we can watch the news...)

"NO WORK" (Except preparing, cooking and cleaning up after the most labour intensive meal we eat together all week)

Mum would spend 4 hours every Sunday on the phone to her brothers and sisters. Dad would spend it asleep. When I asked what I could possibly do, staring at the blank TV screen, I was usually told "do some schoolwork", "read a book!" They never did offer an acceptable answer to my points that schoolwork is WORK and reading a book requires more effort, and is potentially even more irreverent than watching something non-offensive on TV.

The important thing was always, of course, that they could feel good about themselves as parents, by believing they were keeping one of God's commandments. Logic wasn't an issue, as long as they believed they were doing right.

How did your TBM families enforce the holiness of Sundays after church?

Growing up, mom and dad were not consistent at all. During my father's more pious months, he'd say something like, "we don't do that on Sunday" and I'd think, "we sure as hell have - just a few weeks ago."

After working many Sundays as a teen, my only real goal was to try not to make anyone work on a Sunday - so no restaurants, movies, and such.

When I was first married, my (now ex) wife tried to impose the no Sunday tv bit. I agreed because I've always thought tv was a waste of time. Then, I realized she did it because she absolutely hated it when I watched football. When something she really wanted to watch came on, we suddenly watched tv on Sunday.

I recall reading something about "iron rod mormons" and "liahona mormons" that I used to like. Believe it or not, the suggestion was that we are given some very rigid commandments so we can learn to be strictly obedient, but that we are also given some intentionally vague or ambiguous commandments so we can learn to listen to the spirit and do what's right for us in that moment. The troubles for most members arise when they stay in "iron rod" mode during "liahona" moments, and vice-versa.

The dumbest conversation I had about this was with some very strict mormons about their Sunday habits. There were compelling arguments exchanged about what was right or wrong for Sunday. One guy said it was okay to swim on Sunday - AS LONG AS it was your own pool, and your neighbors couldn't see you swimming.

He was serious.

Our neighbors are so wishy washy about their Sunday rules. Of course it's their life and decision but it confuses the hell out of my children. Some Sunday's their kids can't play at all...other Sunday's they are out playing with their Mormon dinner guests but our kids can't join in...other Sunday's they play with our kids. WTH!

Saturday is the special day, its the day we get ready for Sunday.... WOW

Sunday was my most dreaded day of the week as a kid. Now its my favorite.

Back in the old days, DH and I both worked full time outside the home. We had four kids. So Saturdays meant laundry, cleaning the house, grocery shopping, riding herd on the kids to be sure that everybody had something clean and appropriate to wear to church, and if anybody was supposed to have prepared a talk, that they had written and practiced it. So Saturdays weren't fun. We were too tired to enjoy them.

Sundays, by comparison, weren't too bad. We put in our three hours, but after that, we loosened up. We did things as a family, watched TV or videos, read, and relaxed. After running around like mad gerbils on Saturday, we needed it.

Being exmo empty-nesters is so much easier!

Because saturday is the sabbath. Don't they know this ?

Funny how the most TBM families can adapt their own self-imposed rules on a whim. I expect every child growing up in Mormonism will have experienced their parents going through phases of piousness, where the permissible Sunday activities will alter from month to month.

And yet these children, despite growing up in a state of continous confusion over the issue, will probably do exactly the same to their kids, all the while wishing "The Brethren" would set the rules for them. Mormons don't like it when they are told to figure it out for themselves. How can you know if you're doing it right if the Profit doesn't give you clear commandments?

I've sat through entire relief society and Sunday school lessons where everyone argues about what is okay to do on the sabbath. Not having it spelled out for us means everyone makes up their own rules, then judges each other.

no tv
no homework
no shopping
no restaurants
no radio
no housework
no phone
no friends
no playing
usually had cold cereal and grilled cheese for meals
on fast sunday us kids would raid the garden
only naps,reading,going too church on sunday
always went to church while on vacation
if we were too far in the wilderness,we held our own meetings
basically it was like being in a very quiet prison

I knew several families like this. I laugh now because I actually remember sort of respecting the idea that someone was really trying to avoid worldly things and working.

And I distinctly remember one fast Sunday when I must've eaten 200 raspberries from our back yard. I was sick as a dog, and I thought for sure it was because I had sinned.

That was our existence too. In hindsight, it was completely jacked up. What a waste of a day. Reading crappy fiction (scriptures), listening to mind numbing talks, avoiding TV with things like PBS and other cable channels that would challenge our mythical beliefs. Heaven forbid that we should actually have to think critically and try to defend our beliefs.

No working or shopping on Sunday because...some clown 2500 years ago decreed that the arbitrary Sabbath day should be lived with an arbitrary set of rules. Then other clowns have taken those rules and turned them into various other sets of arbitrary rules...because they can.

And don't forget changing the arbitrary day that the "Sabbath" is celebrated, despite not being Jewish.

My relative was in the First Presidency, and we used to stay at his cabin, on a lake filled with fish, with boats, with its own boat dock, and he had horses to ride, and off-road vehicles to drive. ON sundays, we could not enjoy any of these things. I'm amazed that we could even look at the gorgeous scenery, for fear of being too hedonistic. Going for a Sunday drive was forbidden. He didn't allow playing cards, board games, and certainly not TV or radio, because those were "instruments of The Devil." We could read, but only the scriptures or church publications. We were not allowed to go down to the lake shore or to the boat docks.

We had discussions about swimming on Sundays. Would it count if we accidentally fell in the water, and had to swim to avoid drowning? Hmmmmm. Maybe that's why there was the stay away from the water rule. But there were rumors that Satan ruled the water.

While the cabin was being built, we stayed in tents, and had no shower, so we bathed in the lake. On Sundays, we had to take a sponge bath out of basins, instead.

My cousins and neighbor kids and I took the leftover wood scraps, and built a secret tree house, deep in the woods. We would go play there on Sundays, to escape the din of the MoTab choir. We'd play cops and robbers, treasure hunt, and hide and seek. We had so much fun it was sinful.

Ha ha ha Forestpal,
that's exactly how my parents enforced "the Sabbath."

I hated Sundays, I was so bored.

When I got older, because I had been so heavily brainwashed, I just used Sundays to get extra sleep. But otherwise, it remained a pretty boring day.

That is, untiil i became an Exmo. Suddenly, a fantastic new day was mine!

Such a funny topic because I was just having a chat about this with my TBM girlfriend. We've sorta had the beginning of the end (of our relationship) chat and one of the things I cited as my reasons was that I dont want my sundays (which would be half of my time off if im working a monday to friday job) dictated by the church. She seemed to think its crazy that I wouldnt want sundays spent how she has spent them her whole life.

Someone mentioned the no swimming thing. What is so bad with swimming? She said its fine to take your whole family down to the local park and throw a ball around. I live by the ocean so siaid something like "oh ok so we could go and throw a ball around and go for a swim on a nice summers day etc?". She's like maybe not the simming part.

WTF is so bad about swimming?! I'm assuming its something about taking your garmies off or something?

So weird.

Something about Satan ruling the waters or some other bullshit, I just read it in a post above this one...

freeman Wrote:
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> Something about Satan ruling the waters or some
> other bullshit, I just read it in a post above
> this one...

That is correct. It is a basic teaching that is covered in Seminary for high school students and Sunday School/Priesthood/Relief Society the years that Church History/D&C are covered.

D&C 61:4, 19

NZ_Nevermo Wrote:
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> WTF is so bad about swimming?

See this thread:

http://exmormon.org/phorum/read.php?2,204842

If they allowed or enouraged swimming, kids and families would go to the pool or the beach for the day on Sundays, instead of to church.

Plain and simple.

My old TBM neighbors allowed their kids to ride their bikes on Sundays. One day I said hello to them and they looked right at me and didn't respond. I said hello again and the older sibling ran over and whispered to me that they can't talk to people outside on Sundays!!! LOL

I used to absolutely hate Sundays. It was such a day of guilt, confusion, worthlessness for me. I love them now and look forward to them!

About the swimming thing, I have always been told that Satan controls the water. That is why missionaries can't swim. Please correct me.

Satan controls the water? Isn't that slightly ironic then that people are baptised by "immersion in water"? Is that myth some kind of sick joke?
Also, Sundays in the mormon world are to be kept holy, but are also "family days" right? Thats the kinda vibe I get from my gf.

Yes, Satan controls the water... but not the water in the baptismal font obviously.

As for "family days", that does appear to depend on how the father of the family inteprets "keep it holy". Strictly speaking, that is what Monday nights are for, to make up for the fact you spend all day Sunday at church or quietly reading your scriptures alone. But many TBM families I know will go out together on Sunday afternoon and don't see any problem with it.

D&C 61: 13-19

Interesting. Given that JS and SR never invented any "revelation" that didn't suit their purpose, the question remains for me, what was the purpose of that particular revelation?

church history volume 1 chapter 16.

condensed version: JS almost fell out of a boat and drowned. His cronies were making fun of him because he didn't want to get in a boat after that. Bam! The water is controlled by satan! And God said so Nananana.

So 180-odd years ago Joseph falls out of a boat, and since then millions of people have died believing that Satan rules the water, and have avoided swimming.

You couldn't make it up!

The whole Satan ruling the waters thing comes from D&C 61. JS and his peeps were traveling by canoe that week and apparently not having fun with the boats. Can't keep your canoe afloat? Could it be..... SATAN?!

I got yelled at by my bishop for giving a SS class and destroying the faith of an innocent young lady by suggesting a non-supernatural reason for a "scripture" getting written.

My TBM ex-husband even took it to mean that Satan controlled the water in the bathroom as he didn't like to shower much, especially on Sundays. Let's just say that it's one of the top 5 reasons he's my ex.

No television, only church films (although my step dad was allowed to sneak in some football every once in a while).
No music, except church music, which usually ended up being boring-ass primary music all day long.
We couldn't even go outside. We had to do quiet things inside while our parents took a 3 hour nap after lunch.
No shopping, of course. No going over to friends houses. Of course we were allowed to work around the house and do all kinds of chores while the parentals were napping. No talking on the phone to friends.

fallenangelblue Wrote:
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> Of course we were allowed to work around
> the house and do all kinds of chores while the
> parentals were napping.

Funny how it worked out like that eh. God must have given them a direct revelation.

Stay away from a baptismal font and you'll be fine. All other water is created by God, who saw it and it was good.

Some say MOrmonism is an Old Testament religion. The swimming argument is EXACTLY the ox-in-the-ditch argument where the disciples ask Jesus if it's ok to pull the animal out even if it's Sunday.

I'm sure he would tell you cultists it's ok to swim to shore if you fall off the boat you shouldn't have been using on Sunday anyway.

Anagrammy

No TV till the evening, and boy that took several years of convincing.
No playing outside.
No shopping, dining, any kind of spending money unless it was an emergency.
Always had to report about favourite talk.

Is it any wonder I was relieved when I finally got a job that required working Sundays?