Dear Dad,

I can't tell you how much I appreciate your letter. I feel now, as I've always felt, that you have a genuine love for me and that your only desire is that I lead a happy, fulfilling life. I believe this desire comes from your heart because you are my father and you love me. I don't think you're using me as a missionary opportunity.

One thing I've learned to appreciate about our relationship is that your love for me is unconditional. You are a father who happens to hold the priesthood, not a priesthood-holder who happens to be a father. I hope you can recognize the distinction.

I'd like to share something with you that may be counterintuitive to everything you hold sacred, but that has great meaning to me. I hope you'll open your heart to what little wisdom your son has to share with his father: "True civilization exists somewhere between "I don't know" and "I could be wrong."

I don't have the answers to all of life's mysterious questions. I don't know where I came from, what my purpose is, and where (if anywhere) I'm going when I die. I just don't know. I can't even be sure that these questions are capable of being answered by anyone, even Elohim. I don't know that even he knows, if he exists.

I don't know if Elohim exists. As a child I was told to repeat the words but that was dishonest and I've come to own up to that. If he does exist the only genuine feeling I could possibly have for him would be sympathy.

I don't know that the church is true. A sincere examination of the evidence leads an honest individual to conclude that the church has not been able to back up its claims and its constant reliance on subject experiences as a form of supernatural confirmation is very telling.

Dad, I want you to know that I know that I could be wrong. Maybe the church is true. Maybe Elohim does exist. I want you to know that even if I did know that these two facts were true I would still not be a member of the church and I would not worship Elohim.

I am responsible for my own actions and my own destiny. I refuse to allow anyone else, no matter how well-intentioned, to take upon themselves the responsibility or consquences of my actions, and I refuse to take responsibility for anyone else's.

Dad, I want you to know that you can never be beyond the point of no return. Even if you are exalted and given authority and dominion over the elements; even if you exalt untold numbers of intelligences over eons in the eternities; no matter how many gods are under you, no matter how many kingdoms you create, no matter how many worlds you populate; it's never too late to create your own destiny in your own way according to your own desires.

If, perchance, one day you decide you no longer desire to do the same things you've always done and desire to greet the unknown and unknowable with open arms, you might find that I have a little something to teach you for a change.

I love you, Dad.

Good points you made, thank you. I wonder why the thread was closed, guess it was too personal of a thread and dragging my dad into it?

Threads usually close once they get in a range of 30-35 responses (or so.) It's not personal, it's just a way for Erik and Susan to keep the bandwidth under control. You are always free to start a new thread that continues the same topic. No worries! -- you posted a good, relevant topic and we are always glad to help.