I wonder because people with any such disorder lack interaction and communicating skills.You need to be a good home teacher and missionary to be a Mormon,and potentially a poster child who can look good in I am a Mormon ads.

Do many people with aspegers or related issues succeed in being an active Mormon and think being a mormom does good for them?

A physician has said recently that I may have aspergers,but that would need more of a specialized diagnosis.

I know one exmo who has Asperger's. He was BIC and served a mission so I guess it depends on the individual. This guy is very logical minded and left the church because of that and nothing to do with his Aspergers.

I know a man with Aspergers. He plays the organ in perfection, cleans toiletts of course, is a hometeaching partner. Nothing more. No priesthood duties. He woult not give a testimony or a talk, never answers in lessons ... but pays tithing ;-) And TSCC knows how to use him anyway.

That's what TSCC does , uses people.

I actually know a LOT of LDSer's with Aspergers.

I think that Mormons are the one group of people who might actually be more socially awkward than Aspies. I never saw them as having any trouble fitting in at our Ward, but i'm sure it's different everywhere.

On the other hand, there are other issues someone with Aspergers would have to face. My husband has it, and he investigated the church kind of out of morbid curiosity. He was so perplexed by everyone crying at the pulpit and spouting the warm fuzzies. He is so logic driven that he couldn't even pretend not to be visibly disgusted.

Which is actually how we met, because I approached him after church trying to help share the gospel. Hah! He of course didn't join the church, but de-converted me instead.

Yeah, that's what made me someone who actually wasn't that great at being a Mormon.

It took me 13 years to finally get up and bear my testimony and 14 years to finally give a talk. Turned out I was pretty good at it, but I need to really feel that I know what I'm talking about before you'll get me to do something outside of my comfort zone like that.

I spent a lot of time trying to hide behind people so that I wouldn't be asked to give a prayer or read something. I hated being asked to read a scripture.

Greyfort Wrote:
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> Yeah, that's what made me someone who actually
> wasn't that great at being a Mormon.


Ha ha! I didn't realize this was an old post and was going to write, "Me too," until I realized that I had just quoted myself. hehe

The logical bits like reciteing pre set prayers I can imagine would be fine but as soon as it got into the fuzzy stuff like the opening and closering prayers thats not logical so they just dont get it.

Oh, I get it. Just didn't wanna do it. LOL I hate calling any attention to myself and feeling all eyes on me.

In some ways, I think it would be easier because the "rules" are pretty well discussed and put into place. However, because those of us on the autism spectrum are logical thinkers, I think that cognitive dissonance will eventually win out. Also, I found the social aspect of religious belief a nightmare -- I'm just not a people person and I don't like to be around lots of people. I had huge depression problems. Oh, and there is a substantial group of those on the autism spectrum who are functionally retarded and can't be considered "members" of any religion since there's no way to determine that they've made a choice for themselves rather than just going through the motions they've been conditioned to perform.

I agree that people with Aspergers would have a harder time believing the chirch.

It would be almost impossible for someone with Aspergers to believe in an invisible sky wizard with a zombie son and a child molesting conman prophet.

But it may be possible for someone BIC with Aspergers to be happy with it. They don't know anything else and they may like the routine.

I agree that the routine and the order of it can make it easy for Aspies. I'm not the only one who thinks that my father is on the Asperger's end of the ASD. Yes, very high-functioning, a masters degree in physics. But he has no ability to make his brain go outside the box. But some of the signs are definitely there--very robotic, little social interaction (church or work only), obsession with unusual things (don't get me going on the zero point field), and practically no ability at all to show emotion or empathy. He's not only narcissistic, but just does not comprehend that the world isn't all about him. I, of course, am no psychologist so he may just be an asshole for no reason. But sometimes I like to think that part of it he couldn't help.

I was discussing that with my Mom yesterday. She said to me, "I never could understand how you believed that stuff."

I said that she and my Dad had never given me a direction in that area and here I was, a young teenager, with adults telling me, "You've found the truth! So few people do. Isn't that marvellous? How lucky are you?" I figured they wouldn't lie to me.

But I mentioned that I never really was a very good Mormon. I wouldn't do my visiting teaching. I avoided prayers and scripture reading wherever possible. Callings as well.

Thank goodness I was never a great tithe-payer either. I paid more than I wish I had, but I never kept it up perfectly for very long.

I realize now that I spent 30 years trying hard to keep myself in a convinced state, but I don't think I ever was a true believer.

The beginning of my decision to leave came when I realized that I never truly believed. I had only hoped it was true. Then I felt like a fraud. I was a 'hoper' not a believer.

There were certainly times when I was more convinced than at other times, but my attendance was often spotty. I never dated, married, and had kids. I'm sure they felt I was no loss to their cause when I left.

(Except that I had a short marriage and two children.)

Yeah, it's possible. Depending on how high functioning the Aspergers person is, he or she will be called upon to do whatever he or she can do.

I have several BIC cousins on the spectrum. I have no idea how TBM they are at this point, but they were definitely raised in it.

And then there's me. Sometimes weird enough to make people ask me if I'm an Aspie. No, I'm perfectly normal. The rest of the world is fucking weird.



Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 11/13/2011 02:16PM by WinksWinks.

I am one of the high profile posters on this board, but I'm afraid people will discount anything that I say from now on if I give my name.

I have been diagnosed with Asperger's and it affects people differently than most people think. I have an IQ of 155, so I was able to teach myself to be social and pick up on the cues. I was Homecoming King and on Student Council all 4 years (I won for real, not because people felt bad for me or wanted to make fun of me). In fact, hardly anyone would guess that I have Asperger's if they met me. Asperger's just makes you think differently and care less about other people. It makes you have to work and think about being social. I overcame it though and you wouldn't be able to tell that I have it.

That said, it definitely helped me out of the church. It helped me think very logically and critically about everything in the church and not just ignore it for social reasons. I figured out that the church wasn't true over a year before I read anti-Mormon literature because I realized that the church doesn't live up to its claims and its scriptures are riddled with silliness.

Asperger's got me off my mission with a medical release (because it can lead to severe psychosis under stress and I played that up) when I decided that I was done with the mission shit. And I have never been more grateful for the syndrome in my life.

Asperger's is a part of who I am and was essential to getting me out. I have been able to largely overcome its effects and use its benefits (like greater focus and drive for knowledge). For that, I thank God that I have it.

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/sciencetech/article-2039690/Atheism-autism-Controversial-new-study-points-link-two.html
"People with 'mild' forms of autism are more likely to be atheists, according to a controversial new study - and more likely to shun organised religion in general."

I also know of another one who is the head of perhaps the biggest software company in the world ;)

I'm also one who didn't last long in the church, as I do have Asperger's. I have managed to overcome a lot of the social problems, as most people I know have no idea I'm on the spectrum.

It did lead me out of Mormonism relatively quickly since I have a logical brain and couldn't shut that part off in order to fit in. I did give a testimony, but only once. I've taken enough acting classes and public speaking classes that I managed to fool everyone into believing it was a real testimony.

On the other hand, I never got assigned any "callings" and have never been a VT, probably because the leaders were able to tell I was different, even if they didn't realize why.

It wasn't until I left Mormonism and was getting counseling that I was diagnosed, since my therapist thought I had it and referred me for the diagnosis.

I married into a BIC family with four generations of Aspies including my son.

My former husband was raised BIC and thought it was all logical. BUT he thinks the GAs are a bunch of old fogies out of touch with reality. He cherry picks the 'gospel according to Morons'.

My son is spiritual but does lean towards agnosticism. He wants nothing to do with religion of any kind.

My FIL spent a lot of energy trying to 'fit in' and feeling awkward. He obsessed over being properly dressed ( a carry over from the depression of the 30s where people couldn't dress well unless they had money). He would force his son to go to dances at church in a white shirt and tie! Worked for the 30s, but not the 70s where everyone else was in bright shirts, no ties and wide flared jeans!

Also my FIL's outright honesty got him a lot of social snubbing. He blurted out things as he saw it. The child who said the Emperor had no clothes needed to learn to shut up in public. As I tell my kids; "It's only funny in the movies."
Aspies behaviors of being logical, asking pertinent questions, and being honest are not welcome in the church!!!

I agree Anon. My IQ isn't quite as high as yours. It's 140, but I'm sure my nephew, also an Aspie, is at about 155. He's a mini-genius. That kid just blows me away sometimes.

But yeah, I think as we age, we just learn to cope and we learn how to interact with others more effectively. For instance, I had to teach myself to remember to at least look into someone's eyes a little bit when I talk to them. Otherwise, my eyes will be busily searching the room and they'll never know if I'm paying attention or not. LOL

They diagnosed my nephew at a very young age, so he's being taught how to interact, so that as he ages, no one will really notice. I'm sure no one would notice that I'm an Aspie either. They either just think I'm shy or a snob, which I'm definitely not. I'm just awkward in social situations. Other than that, I'm perfectly normal, thank you very much. :o)

I think about this same question quite a bit. I was not born into it, but I joined when I was 18. Looking back, the reason I was suseptable and joined the morg is because of the Asperger's syndrome. I had no idea that I had it at the time and would have been surprised. But one of the reasons I think I was sucked into it, is because the Mormon crowd were the one's that I fit into the best, and seemed to "know how to act." One thing that really disturbes me is that I have no doubt that if I had been born into mormonism, I would still be an ultra TBM. That is a good question.

You have to be careful about making generalizations about Aspies. Social skills do not come naturally to us, but they can be learned. We may have trouble guessing what people are feeling, but we do not lack empathy, as I have seen some claim on this board.

That said, the first thing most of us would think of relative to Aspies in the LDS church is that it is a church for extraverts, and Aspies are often introverted. That would seem to make it an extremely uncomfortable fit. But there are several subtypes of Asperger's syndrome. The aloof subtype is most common. There are also the "outgoing but odd" types, as my former psychologist, a specialist in AS, described it. These folks might do okay for a little while in Mormon circles. Not making friends easily elsewhere, and being naive about other people's intentions, they may actually be interested in a church that seems to offer instant friendships, etc.

But then at some point, they're going to start noticing logical absurdities in LDS doctrine, and the rampant hypocrisy among the members. And not understanding that asking difficult questions is taboo among Mormons -- or not really caring -- the Aspie is going to start vocalizing his/her doubts and start finding him- or herself shunned. Aspies also tend to have difficulties with authority figures and are not going to submit meekly to the power structure in the church.

In general, I'd have to say that Aspie converts aren't going to last long. People raised in the church may last longer, but I'm betting that Aspies have a higher rate of "apostasy" than neurotypicals. A cult is a highly cohesive social group. That is exactly the kind of environment we don't do well in.

That's true. I'm very good at empathy. But I taught myself to be. The way that I feel empathy for others and their situations is that I search my brain for the nearest experience I've had that matches theirs and I remember how that felt.

If someone says to me, "I just had surgery and it's so hard to recover," then I'll say, "Oh, man. I know how that is. I've had 8 surgeries in my life and it's awful."

They probably think I've taken the conversation and turned it around to be about me. But that's not what I'm doing at all. I guess it's my way of saying to them, "I've had this happen, so I understand how you're feeling now."

As Aspies age, it gets harder and harder to realize there's anything different about us at all, because we've learned how to cope after going through life's experiences. I really don't feel any different than anybody else anyway. I'm just me.

I have been considering Mormonism. I believe the Bible but not the Book of Mormon. However, I don't feel accepted in regular churches , and Mormons seem more accepting or maybe just less picky (I had some acquaintances while I was in college). Would this be a good idea?

I really do not want to tell anyone what thier spiritual path should or should not be . mormons are "accepting " because they see you as 10 percent of your income . Car salesmen are accepting when they are trying to sell you a car.
The Mormon Church is a business and it's all about pay to pray.Try just going to the Ward and tell the bishop you just like the Sunday meetings and are not interested in going to the temple. Then see how accepting they are .

SD Aspie Wrote:
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> I have been considering Mormonism. I believe the Bible but not the Book of Mormon. However, I don't feel accepted in regular churches, and Mormons seem more accepting or maybe just less picky (I had some acquaintances while I was in college). Would this be a good idea?

Mormons are trained to be overly friendly to newcomers, who are called "investigators." Many of us on this board refer to this as "love bombing." If you pursue learning about the Mormon faith via the church missionaries, you will find the missionaries VERY friendly and the members of the local ward VERY friendly as well.

However this will change after you get baptized into the faith. The missionaries will get rotated out after a couple of months, and you may never see them again. The membership's interest in you will wane. They will also start to enforce church demands on you, including three hours at church on Sunday, a calling (a church job,) a 10% tithe, cleaning the church, and so on. If you ever leave the Mormon faith, these people who were so friendly to you at first might very well shun you. Like the JWs, Mormonism is a high demand faith that will drain you of everything you've got.

Keep looking for a friendly mainstream Christian congregation. They are out there. Try the ELCA Lutherans, the UMC Methodists, the Presbyterians (PCUSA,) or the Episcopalians. Keep visiting churches until you find a good fit. Whatever friendships you make at these churches are more likely to be authentic than the Mormons who are love-bombing you or offering you conditional friendship.



Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 06/05/2018 05:47AM by summer.

Whatever I am, I can't do Mormonism.

There was a highly disproportionate number of aspergers/autism spectrum kids in my ward growing up, like over a dozen. A few of them were functionally retarded, I don’t mean that in a mean way I mean that they had severe mental deficiencies. The ones that didn’t I suspect will eventually grow out of Mormonism, and I think a couple of them rely on Mormonism so much for their socializing that they require it, as it fills a social need that they get nowhere else.

The mormons will baptise anyone who has a hand and a head.

A hand to raise
A head to bow

A hand to salute
A head to minister

A hand to hold the nose
A head to cry itself dry

Shoot they'll even baptise headless, topless, clueless clowns.

M@t

I relatively recently found out I have Aspergers.

I was born into the church in 1962 - and it's only now that what happened to me makes much more sense, given that knowledge.


Growing up in the religion, by far the most difficult aspects for me were the social aspects. As a child, I found it very difficult to understand my fellow classmates in sunday school or Primary. They kept doing strange, weird things that were not strictly rational; I would be sat there, baffled thinking something like "but that is not logical!" - a bit like a low-rent, Yorkshire Mr. Spock lol.

But that only got worse once I turned 12 and I went into MIA/Mutual or whatever they chose to call it. There is a very heavy social emphasis, with 'socials' and dances organised and I was completely baffled by it all.

Add to the fact that Aspergers meant I could not dance at all, as - like many - I was completely clumsy and physically uncoordinated.

All in all, it was not a good experience, from that perspective.

Hannah @ chat to a missionary says it is possible. Does that answer the question?

Some people with asperger Personally I pefer autism aspergers just adds insult to injury if ya ask me. But anyways some people with autism DO want and need a cure and while I'm happy that some autistic people are happy with it and do ok in life and feel that it makes them who they are others who are more severely affected by it are in a lot if pain because of it both emotionally and physically and it IS more like an illness to them then "who they are" is someones schizophrenia or cancer "who they are"? No its not severe aspergers/autism can give someone terrible painful sensory difficulties and make them have a terrible time interacting with people and can cause terrible depression and anxiety that they would be better off without.

Its important to realize that not all autistics are super smart sometimes it gives them terrible learning difficulties and have employment issues and autistic children are being bullied alot and for some folks over all there aspergers makes them feel suicidal I feel like people with the more severe aspergers/autism cases shouldn't be forced to say this is who I am I don't need a cure there shouldn't be any shame in having a mental condition you didn't choose to live with and wanting a potential treatment for it I realize when your experience with something isn't bad it can be difficult to realize its inpact on others affects them differently then you and I'm not trying to tell anyone off just educate them. And let them know there's nothing wrong with the more severely affected people wanting a cure. If you don't want a cure and you feel happy with your autism that is great! But there are others farther along the spectrum that are truely suffering and if they want a potential treatment then they should most definitely be allowed to have one!

female aspie here. I was BIC but hated Mormonism from the day I saw my parents in the Mormon underwear. I did not grow up in the morridor, but in the south where there are no Mormons. I was very embarrassed of the Mormonism and told no one. If some found out of the Mormonism I was around, I would never want to show my face in school again. It was something that I was ashamed of my entire life. I NEVER wanted to be associated with mormonsim. I never got married and never wore the underwear.

I was 17 when I found out you still had to wear the underwear even if you never married. My plan was to never marry just because of the underwear.

As my parents drove home after church that day. I had tears streaming down my face knowing that I wasn't going to heaven because I wanted to wear normal underwear and was never going to marry.

Yes I'm a Aspie, but I feel that in no way it had anything to do with me hating Mormonism. I didn't even get diagnosed until I was 30.

My brother had Aspergers, and I always felt he and Mormonism were a perfect fit. He love the black-and-white thinking, the rules and schedules, the regimentation. He was a tattle-tale, and it was popular for kids to rat-out transgressors, like little Nazi informers. He thrived in that role.

My brother had a high IQ, and had a photographic memory, so he was The Scripture Expert for his Sunday school classes. Chapter and verse, he had the BOM and the D&cC practically memorized. He also knew church history, as some of our ancestors were the very first Mormons. He knew the exact day and date of all the events--real and invented. He was also a close relative of a very high-up GA in the day.

My brother was loud and aggressive, not at all shy. He would interrupt the Sunday school teacher, and correct him on any numbers errors. He would interrupt with a quoted scripture, that usually had nothing to do with the lesson, but had a key word in it.

We didn't know my brother had Asperger's, and I gave him a hard time, because although he had scriptures memorized, he could not tell us the MEANING of the scripture. Actually, this ignorance of meaning made him a better Mormon. He didn't comprehend enough to question.

All he knew is that he didn't like some things, and certain arrogant leaders made him mad. He had a foul temper and no patience to sit still, be quiet, and listen. All of this made him quit Mormonism, as soon as he got off his mission. Our GA relative died, and my brother felt that he had lost his "Mormon Royalty" status. Leaving, for him, was more an emotional thing. The Mormons had taught him that there were certain things that he could not know--and that no one could know for certain--and that God Almighty didn't have to bother to explain His Great Plans to mere peons like us. They made him feel like a buffoon, whenever he asked questions. He preferred to keep his genius image, and stick to scripture-quoting.

He never married, but he made a lot of money, which would come in huge chunks, and he would pay tithing on it, with great flair, and he got lots of approval for that. He bore his testimony EVERY fast Sunday, without fail, and someone would always have to make him stop talking, to give others a chance. He did have a sense of humor, though.

He never held any church positions, and his mission was just a ruse, but I think that without the church group as his audience, and as instant "friends," he would have killed himself, which he was always threatening to do. He died last year, most of us had never seen such an interesting production of a funeral, pre-planned by himself. The speakers were friends of ours--professional writers, and scientists, not Mormons. Music by Beethoven and Mozart. Too bad he missed it, but he did create it and imagine it.

I so sorry for his passing, was he old, diseased, or an accident? He sounds like he got his head on straight especially quiting Mormonism. My condolences for your loss.

Youngest brother has ASD. My parents give him no freedom and he lives at home. He will never go on a mission, never go to college, and never marry. He is high functioning but my parents feel like they have been "chosen" as "special needs parents." We have a history of ASD in our family and he is the only one allowed choices.

Not allowed choices.

Your brother's community might have an agency that could provide disability advocacy for your brother.

*raises hand* I was diagnosed twice with being on the autism spectrum.

I had many signs growing up - but it being the 90's, or my parent's lack of taking the kids to the doctors, I wasn't diagnosed properly until I was 18 - a legal adult. I was homeschooled and even that was hard.

I can say one thing, a lot of those with Aspergers take shit seriously, and our minds are very impressionable.

My mother is a convert, my father born into the church.
I stuck with the church because it made me happy and it made my parents happy, or so I thought.
Here I had people and my parents saying I had the whole truth and nothing but the truth, yet as I grew older, was told I'd have a fairytale marriage in the temple; yet something still felt off.

Oh sure, I gave the facade of being a perfect Molly. I didn't actually pay tithes but claimed I did. I would do baptisms, and take sacrament. Claimed I read the Bible and BoM front to back when I hardly touched it.

It wasn't until a speaker at G.C. (I don't even remember which) said something along the lines of "ask yourself if your testimony is real, or if you're just using your parent's testimony as your own". That talk changed my life, and it made me realize that I didn't actually believe - and I was okay with that!

And now, baba-bing bada-boom, I am the first ex-mo in my immediate family as well as the gay sibling (that's another thing, temple marriage always turned me off).



Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 07/01/2018 04:05AM by lazylizard.