Nightingale brought up an interesting question yesterday. "How many threads are too many?"

I've noticed anger over this issue off and on for years, sometimes from posters with temporary names like "Deadhorse" or "I'm sick of this topic," "Enough already!," "Good grief!," or "Get over it."

I was the recipient of this venom for a number of years while I was figuring out what mishies go through in their training and abusive cult situation which forces them to frequently become overly aggressive and insensitive. Many posters hated how I phrased the questions or summarized what I learned from the replies.

From this I learned that when threads hit close to home, posters tend to let loose with what was pent up rage and frustration. Many don't want to see hurtful reminders of what they've suffered or what their mishie sons and daughters suffer.

What are other reasons for trying to shut down discussion of certain topics?

Raw nerves?

Boredom from too much time on the board where there's a vast but still limited supply of topical subjects?

Feelings of entitlement?

Lack of interest in reaching out on topics that don't have personal implications to the reader?

A feeling of being left our or that there aren't enough resources if some people "hog the board?"

Just my musings. Other ideas?

Are you frustrated from seeing the same topics again and again? Or the same ones for several days in a row?

Are there certain topics you hate and wish would go away forever?



Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 12/14/2011 08:32AM by Cheryl.

Every "hurt" person here should have the right to vent in their own way (as long as they follow the rules). Some are even venting about venting!

Not every topic appeals or is interesting to me. So I move on to another topic. So what, my emotional baggage is mine and theirs is theirs! People have different experiences with Mormonisn and therefore have different problems as well as no two people react exactly the same to their hurt and problems.
Even when some react negatively to me, that is okay also.

I will say that there are a few that I "feel" are not here to recovery but have other agendas...I guess that is to be expected. I can't imagine ever going on an LDS site to "heckle" TBMs, but we "recovering" understand the LDS view on boundries!

I have noticed that there are names that I pick out as ones who usually have a topic that I find ecpecially interesing or insightful (yes, Cheryl, you are one of them!)

Back to your last question>Are there certain topics you hate and wish they'd just go away forever?<

Yes, there are, but maybe it is just that I am not interested in that topic....some get pretty deep, or seem to go off on a tangent. I think that some of the topics are "above my head" intellectually---sometimes Steve Benson does this to me, but what would this RfM haven be with out him? Not nearly so interesting!

read a thread...i think it is more of a "why the hell does that person keep on about this"(whatever "this" is)
some people here are tenacious in their postings of subjects...but if the subject wasn't interesting or divisive there wouldnt be a lot of threads... my view?
dont read em if you dont like the OP views or subject. it really is that easy...also Admin is really the only person with the right to decide what stays and what goes.
just sayin!

Judging each other doesn't help us recover.

subject especially if it is a subject I'm interested in because there is always something new to be learned.

And things do get talked over many times especially with new people showing up all the time who hadn't ever heard the subject discussed before.

Like others have said--if you don't want to read the thread--skip it.

Because the same person posts the same threads year after year every December - religion/Christianity is insanity/delusion, telling your kids about santa is dangerous, etc.

Year after year, the same threads meant to provoke & inflame...hmm sounds like trolling.

or santa...but... he has a right to start a thread or keep threads going...and does it inflame...of course...is it intended to inflame...of course...while i cretainly dont agree with SB on some of what he posts...i will defend his right to post what he feels is relevent to the Nth degree... i saw some of your posts outcast and i agreed with you for the most part(cant remember exactly..but i remember agreeing with you) maybe if you dont like the subject matter dont read or comment... i say that with all sincerity...and not in a bad way either... if it stresses you out...dont get involved...

I guess with you threads are OK if they promote lies.

Time for you to grow up and become an adult.

And would folks here please quit posting, year after year, that Joseph Smith was a complete fraud? It only upsets, provokes and inflames those who don't want to hear it. C'mon, people, get a life. :)



Edited 8 time(s). Last edit at 12/14/2011 12:36PM by steve benson.

Well, I and many other folks weren't here last year so the threads were new to us and very entertaining. If I'm still around next year I hope to see topics rehashed because I might have a different perspective or something to contribute.

"meant to provoke and inflame....hmmm sounds like trolling."

Where have I heard this argument before?

It seemed funnier this year because you KNEW it was coming.

I don't ever remember santa threads before!! how weird is that?

. . . delusionally dreamy . . . :)

I think, by definition, any thread that goes to closing deserves another thread to continue the discussion, up to the point that they're no longer being posted to.

I will say that I find it amusing when people harp on OPs about the subject matter. It takes courage to start a thread here, and if you don't like what the board is talking about, start your own thread.

This place isn't a living room where we are all trapped together; forced to listen to each and every conversation. It may feel that way if you are addicted to the boards like I am, and if work is slow for the moment.

But that's not reality.

Some of the only threads I have "problems" with are when someone posts a lot of outside links or videos. And that's only because I play on the board at work, and can only go to certain sites and can't watch videos.

Did I ever tell you what a good thinker and writer you are?

Well done.

"In a previous thread, poster 'dagny' asked:

"'Isn't it that time of year for you to share your comments about [Tom] Flynn's "The Trouble With Christmas?' It's one of my favorites. Encore!"

"('Here's what gets me,' posted by 'dagny,' on "Recovery from Mormonism" bulletin board, 6 December 2011, at: http://exmormon.org/phorum/read.php?2,358826,358848#msg-358848)


"Well. OK. Grinch this . . . :)"

http://exmormon.org/phorum/read.php?2,359446,359446#msg-359446
_____


The rest is history (and, for next year, pre-history).

Put that in your Santa pipe and smoke it.

Ho, Ho, Ho!



Edited 4 time(s). Last edit at 12/14/2011 01:28PM by steve benson.

I just love this time of year when people get pissed off about this topic!

I'm easily amused! HO HO Oh Oh. I did it again.

(And I wasn't disappointed!)

Edited 2 time(s). Last edit at 12/14/2011 01:50PM by steve benson.

(Edited 365 times by dagny)



Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 12/14/2011 01:56PM by dagny.

Edited 6 time(s). Last edit at 12/14/2011 01:59PM by steve benson.

Sometimes I believe a lot of this stems from the repeatability factor. Those that have been on here for a long enough period of time start to see the same topic brought up over and over again. One of the ways that I have seen this type of thing handled in the past is by having the older posts archived according to subject matter. That way when Christmas rolls around next year instead of someone new bringing up the same subjects again and again, they can go to the folder marked "Christmas" and there they can read all the subject matter about that topic and if they want to post they will be more informed on what has already been discussed.

Edited 4 time(s). Last edit at 12/14/2011 01:53PM by steve benson.

It also gives oldies and newbies a chance to reply to a current conversation.

I think the people here can and will talk about what they want to talk about. Some topics will come up more than others and reflect what's most important to the most people here (at least in theory, it could be a few vocal people taking up most of a thread or series of threads).

But when I go to a cocktail party or networking function and the room is full of conversations, I don't go around complaining about what a large group of people on the other side of the room find interesting enough to discuss.

I walk in, look around, mingle a little, and join the conversations that interest me. Same thing goes for this forum. If you have to see and skip over some topics, so what? Currently, I will scan the first 3 pages of results anyway and probably choose only 2-3 threads to read, and will respond to maybe 1 of them.

So I would say that MOST of us here scan over the 90% and pay attention to the 10% that is interesting to us at this particular time. Why is this a problem?

I will throw in that if threads could have more than 30 replies somehow then there would be fewer posts on the same topic, and those who are really interested could go through the big ones on their topic.

Posters can sometimes be rather rude about demanding that *their* needs and wishes should be met.

I like the party comparison. Imagine someone who starts calling other guests names for bringing up uninteresting topics. They'd be asked to leave and never invited back. Mingling at a social event is much like scanning the board for appealing topics and bypassing the rest.

The board didn't use to be this way. I don't visit it as often because many posters seem to be mean spirited.

The "santa" issue was a bit over the top!

Some people just walk into a cocktail party and start talking about something that has been beaten to death more than once. The person that brings up the topic feels the animosity from the group for bringing up old news, they become offended and then either leave feeling like they were attacked or they stay and go on and on about how they had their feelings hurt, which in turn brings in everyone else to either defend or attack their position. Then we have topics about why we have too many topics. Some times being forewarned or in this case knowing what is "current" and what is "old news" can be helpful.