I haven’t kept any secrets about leaving the church. I have a blog that I’ve been keeping for years. It doesn’t take much reading between the lines to know that this has been coming for quite a long time. Since leaving I’ve had pleasant talks with most members on my side of the family but my MIL is pretending that she doesn’t know anything about it. I’m sure she knows. I have a stat counter on my blog. I can’t prove that she actually read it but I can tell how long each page was open on her machine and what browser she was using. But I digress. Suffice it to say that I’m pretty sure she knows but just isn’t talking about it.

So as long as she is pleasant about it I’m not in the mood to force a conversation. I’ll let her go on believing whatever she wants about me. But if she puts me on the spot I’ll be sure to set her straight. This is a pattern that we’ve followed before, but with politics. She’s content to believe that I agree with her and not talk about it but if the subject ever does come up I correct her and then the “fun” begins. With politics the four year election cycle is a pretty good indicator of how well my MIL and I get along.

My concern is that there are several events coming up that will force a conversation about the church. One son will be 12 early next year, another will turn 19 in 2013, my daughter is already talking about how nice it would be to have a wedding outside.

I’m curious if any of you have had similar situations and how you handled them. I’ve not hidden anything from her but I haven’t forced the issue either.

the fact that I no longer believe or go.

That's one less confrontation for me to deal with.


Some people don't WANT to talk about the elephant in the living room. They'd rather deny it's there, share the juicy story about it with someone else, or spy on the elephant. Maybe she's curious about the elephant and is starting to sympathize with it. Or maybe she's just planning how to ambush the elephant when least expected.

You gotta admit, though, it IS kinda funny that she has no idea that you know how much time she spends on your blog.

My view is that our private beliefs are private and it's not necessary to share them, unless we are comfortable doing that. It's not about: right/wrong, or denial, or anything other than a personal belief system, which are part of our personal rights.

Some people are content with their own beliefs and not imposing them on anyone else. They do a good job of respecting other people's rights to their beliefs. That includes my LDS friends and family. They don't bother me about it and I don't bother them .
There are thousands of subjects to talk about, religion--Mormonism is only one of them. It's very easy to change the subject and stop answering questions just because we are aked.

Mormonism is very much a patriarchal, cultural, societal religion with a strong emphasis on the Eternal Family. Some individuals are more territorial than others about their beliefs.

Outside the culture, family, etc. most people just don't give a rats patootie what someone's religious beliefs are or are not.

I don't bring Mormonism up very often in any conversation. In fact, I prefer not to.

Sounds to me like your MIL is perfectly aware of where you stand and just wants to avoid unnecessary conflict.