I spent six hours Friday with my 47 year-old BYU grad co-worker. We spent 3 of those hours talking about his mission, 1 hour about his BYU experience, 1 hour about how he met his wife, and the very little amount of time leftover on our work.

Unbelievably, this guy is 47 and his mission and engagement still command the majority of his attention. The guy is so simple-minded, and talks like he's 17 years old. Is it a requirement imposed on BYU grads by the church that they continue to talk about their missions and engagements ad nauseum? Is it an alumni association requirement? What gives?

The textbook question/response sequence of the day:

Him: So, how'd you and your wife meet?
Me: Oh, in grad school, met on a hiking trip, dated a year and a half, got married.

Awkward, anticipatory silence. He sat waiting to pounce like a labrador chasing a tennis ball. I caved.

Me: So, how'd you and YOUR wife meet?
Him: Met at a BYU home evening meeting. My boss let me out of work early -- he's LDS too, you know, and knows the importance of family home evening -- and I met her there. We were engaged within 3 weeks, married in 5. 23 years later and we're still in love. (Of course, this is a synopsis of his 60 minute diatribe.)

I almost threw up my club sandwich and Coke. Predictable, but not anticipated.

I thought to myself, "How can a person fall in love and marry in 5 weeks unless they're only enamored with the IDEA of marriage?" This guy doesn't love his wife, he's comforted by having completed the church requirements on the timeline expected by his leaders and superiors. He continues mindlessly attending meetings, talking about mission/BYU/engagement, and going about his day-to-day without true purpose or fulfillment.

Seems like mission accomplished (no pun intended) on the mind control aspects of this man's life. He's in for life. Why is reality so obvious to some but so foreign to others? Sorry for the rant, but I was annoyed and disappointed...

It seems to be a requirement for all BYU students to talk about these things. Half the student comments in every class begins with some variation of "Well, when I was on my mission in..." I guess a lot of students never outgrow doing this.

As a BYU grad in my 40s, here is my take on that:

First, they are the biggest accomplishments in his life. Ever since he was tiny it was drilled into him to serve a mission and marry in the temple. It was the beginning and end of his goals as a Mormon boy. The fact he hasn't accomplished anything else he considers AS important in the last 20 plus years is so sad I don't even know where to start. Especially since serving a mission and getting married are things anyone can do. Not like being a judge or an award winning journalist or winning a marathon.

Second, most Mormons don't DO anything else but be Mormon. He probably has nothing much else to talk about. Sure, some Mormons have hobbies like fishing or quilting, but they all take a back seat to the LDS machine.

Third, many Mormons can't relate to non-Mormons very well. I noticed that I had trouble knowing what normal grown ups talk about when I left the church and half my family isn't LDS. I learned to watch my non-LDS friends closely and ask a lot of questions rather than prattle on about irrelevant Mormon things.

Finally, what you said about Mormons being in love with the idea of love is spot on. They are in love with the role the Mormon church assigns them - husband, father, priesthood holder - and when it comes to their spouse, they are in love with the role as well. More than the woman, they tend to love how well they fit into the image of perfect Mormon woman. Cute, 19, thin, blonde, airhead virgin who does the cute, adoring, Mormon girl act to perfection. If she fits his idea, if she can act the part, she gets the role. Getting to know the real person isn't a priority. Accomplishing your goal is.

I agree with CA girl. Mormons live in an isolated world of church and family, so they don't have much else to talk about. Even if they are exposed to other things, they don't register with the Mormon mind.

We're just thankful camera phones and facebook didn't exist yet.

Yes. YES IT IS.

AND it is your duty/ assignment to spur them on, subtly mock them to their face, and get them to be so preoccupied with spewing LDS BS and in turn to look so foolish that they end up being FIRED.

PISS ON BYU, and any BYU attendee who does not look on their experience at that academic abyss with out utter contempt.