if it explains the feeling of dreariness, anxiety whenever I talk to a tbm about my "issues" with the Church or even when I spend too much time reading LDS supported material. I will be fine and happy for days until I come in contact with a tbm friend attempting to convince me that the Church. I don't feel guilt afterwards, just a feeling of downness.
I realize that it might sounds odd to some of you but nobody has the monopoly of knowing what transitioning out of Mormonism should be like. We all have different experiences.

Why would it sound odd, Angelina? Emotions aren't good nor bad. They just are.

When someone is mourning the death of a loved one, I often tell that person that there is no right way or wrong way to mourn. It's so individual. When you leave the church, it's likewise a death of sorts -- the death of your former vision of yourself and of your former dreams for yourself. You have to mourn, and that mourning can take a thousand different forms.

Since discussing Mormonism with TBMs leads to feelings of dreariness and anxiety for you, I would minimize those discussions. You don't owe anyone any explantion. You could say that you no longer believe, or the church is not right for you, or that you've outgrown it, or that you've moved on, or that you simply don't want to discuss it. Their desire to know why you left does not trump your need to look after your emotional health. Just because a question is asked does not mean that it has to be answered. Do what is best for you.

Jesus said many would come in his name, and that he wouldnt know them. know. If anything Mormonism is destructive because it is conclusivey false, and also destroys the positive experience someone could have with spirituality and faith.

A false religion was built on fraud.

Gospel of Maehw:
23 At that time if anyone says to you, ‘Look, here is the Christ!’ or, ‘There he is!’ do not believe it.
24 For false Christs and false prophets will appear and perform great signs and miracles to deceive even the elect—if that were possible.
25 See, I have told you ahead of time.

26 “So if anyone tells you, ‘There he is, out in the desert,’ do not go out; or, ‘Here he is, in the inner rooms,’ do not believe it.
27 For as lightning that comes from the east is visible even in the west, so will be the coming of the Son of Man.
28 Wherever there is a carcass, there the vultures will gather.

29“Immediately after the distress of those days

“‘the sun will be darkened,

and the moon will not give its light;

the stars will fall from the sky,

and the heavenly bodies will be shaken.’c

30 “At that time the sign of the Son of Man will appear in the sky, and all the nations of the earth will mourn. They will see the Son of Man coming on the clouds of the sky, with power and great glory.
31 And he will send his angels with a loud trumpet call, and they will gather his elect from the four winds, from one end of the heavens to the other.

32 “Now learn this lesson from the fig tree: As soon as its twigs get tender and its leaves come out, you know that summer is near.
33 Even so, when you see all these things, you know that itd is near, right at the door.
34 I tell you the truth, this generatione will certainly not pass away until all these things have happened.
35 Heaven and earth will pass away, but my words will never pass away.

I did feel a sense of loss when I left the mormon church. I never realized until then that my whole moral code and sense of right and wrong were programmed and I needed to figure that out for myself.

One thing the mormons are great at is convincing everyone that all other churches are wrong. When I left the church I first became an agnostic and then an atheist. I'm glad that I came out of the church after 35 years and I'm proud of who I am now.

It does get better...eventually.

Its probably what people feel like when they leave a MLM scam and have friends that are still in it. It is sad that the world works this way.

And they were right.

Leaving the church is like that. You might be fine for a while, then something hits you like a ton of bricks. And then it might happen again later over the same thing.

After awhile, that starts happening less.

Truthfully, I don't know if a person can forget completely, especially when old issues are brought up repeatedly by continued contact with TBMs. I think it's something you learn to deal with, not really get OVER with.

I experienced inner turmoil for a few years after leaving. I didn't believe in the church, I knew it was bad for me, but leaving left me with mixed feelings. I was excited to be out and on to new things, but meeting members reminded me of the old attachments that still hadn't resolved. It took a while to feel attached to a new life and new people. Even now, once in a while, I feel a pang. It's more poignant than painful but it's a reminder of commitments and feelings I once had and have mostly lost. It will take time for you to transition.



Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 04/05/2012 02:43AM by robertb.

Wow thank you for all of your comments!! I have better days than others. This what I do know: I know that I have to live true to myself. I can't remain active/ inactive while knowing that the church isn't what it claims to be. I also know that I don't want to be bitter and disrespectful. While it aggravates me to observe certain friends being totally blindsided by the LDS church, I need to respect individual beliefs. If they ask me specific reasons of my disbelief, I will gladly give them!