I left the church over 10 yrs ago, but have not requested to have my named removed yet. Every so often, I get the urge to do it. My only issue is not wanting to hurt my parents. Will they be informed of it in some way? Like when they go to tithing settlement? Or will it show up on when they look at their genealogy? They know I don't go, or believe, and are 'OK' with it, but I think that final step of removing my name might just make it more real to them.

Yes. At tithing settlement they will see that your ordinances are no longer listed.

My parents discovered my sister resigned in this way. The hysterics were truly awful. That has kept the rest of us from resigning.

I was about to e-mail mine in this morning, until my husband mentioned this...def. something to think about. Ugh!

If my parents know about it, they've never said anything in the 2 years since. I live a good 30 miles from them and a good 16 miles from the last ward I believe my records were in prior to resignation.

Also they may just bounce an email resignation. Recommend at least a snail mail with some kind of delivery confirmation.

I would say to go ahead, unless you think there may be some drastic fallout.

I guess you might want to make yourself aware of the exact consequences in case you have to explain. Personally, I have to wonder what the real difference is between being a member of record who doesn't believe a whit, and disbelieving it and formally resigning.

To me there can't be a real difference if their god is supposed to know our hearts and minds. I guess the rejection just feels more solid, less of a 'well maybe they'll become active again'.

I resigned through email. It worked just fine. I did have to send a 30 day follow up, and the bishop came by to make sure that I was "sure". He asked if he could as why, and I simply said "My reasons are my own" so he couldn't make an argument, and that was that.

Or someone who hears about it might decide to tell them long before that.

No one in my family found out until years later when I brought it up, but others haven't been so lucky.

I think it might depend on if you are in the same ward. If you are, they will certainly know. If not, then it probably depends on if your Bishop is a tattle-tale type. You might want to transfer your records to where you are living and hopefully the Bishop doesn't know who your parents are.