I weep (literally) for the tragic losses involuntarily imposed on so many today by a pure coward. In trying to understand how such a thing can be perpetrated against the most innocent among us I can't help but think that part of our problem is the desensitization to violence that we face on a day to day basis. In America, the very thought of seeing a naked body part is enough to send us in to a tizzy (a naked boob is a guaranteed R rating) but we allow ourselves and our children to be subjected to endless amounts of violence (in movies, on TV and in video games...it is appalling the amount of violence it takes for a movie to be rated R). I make no excuses for the cowardly act perpetrated today but I also think we, as an American society, need to wake up to the fact that we celebrate violence and this is one of the predictable outcomes of doing so.

I think the dude was upset because he had a micro manager mother who might have been narcissistic. Those guns should have been locked up in a gun safe. If you have a weapon for defense....lock it up! It seems he might have had other issues that contributed to his behavior. Some reports are personality disorder, autism, possible loner, etc.



Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 12/15/2012 08:04AM by puff the magic dragon.

Having been a recipient of my own mother's 'narcissistic rage' quite recently, I can picture what may have gone on in his sick mind. Mine tried to psychologically murder me, using a smear campaign, stalking, and harassmemt. His mother may have shamed him in some way, triggering his inner rage to the point of murder. So utterly sad for all those innocent victims.

Sure, there are horrible mothers out there, but this particular mother didn't pick up a gun and go shoot innocent children in a grade school. The boy did.

I grew up with a horrible father who beat us, punched us, tried to strangle us, etc. I was a good mother and have grown adult children who claim I was and seem to hold me in high esteem. None of my children have mental problems or were ill treated by me, and although I had a tough childhood, I don't suffer from mental problems.

My middle school French teacher was a really fabulous woman and was adored by all and sundry. She was murdered by her son just before he open fire on his high school cafeteria. She was never able to get the help for her mentally challenged son.

My childrens middle school German teacher was a really fabulous woman who was adored by all and sundry. She was murdered by her son with an ax.

I guess my point is, that mentally ill people do things and it's hard to get them help and it's not necessarily connected to bad parenting.



Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 12/15/2012 09:08PM by Devoted Exmo.

In my experience as a teacher, the biggest impediment to getting a kid help is the parent. If a parent doesn't sign off on it, there is nothing we (as school professionals) can do. Even if it's painfully evident that a child has severe mental health issues.

Parents usually don't want to sign off because they are afraid that family secrets will be exposed during the counseling process. That, or they "don't believe in counseling."

Teachers can flag children as mental health risks as early as pre-K. Talk to that young man's former teachers, and I'll bet that you'd get an earful. They usually see it.

Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 12/16/2012 10:27AM by summer.

I totally agree. I keep wondering why, if there was even the slightest inkling that this young man was mentally unstable in some way, why did they even have guns in the house at all, much less where he could access them? And it's not like it was just one for self-defense, there were at least three. The more I think about it, I'm surprised that he didn't shoot even more people before the nightmare ended.

Even people who have a legal concealed carry permit are not allowed to bring guns into a school. The psychopath Adam Lanza very likely understood that. So he was confident that there would be no one present at the school who could use a CC gun to stop him.

Column: Gun-free zones provide false sense of security

http://www.usatoday.com/story/opinion/2012/12/14/connecticut-school-shooting-gun-control/1770345/

It does not take much of a look at human history to know that such violent acts (coughMountainMeadowsMassacreCough), and acts that were far worse, were part of humanity well before we allegedly became "desensitized".

Oh, and you would not be weeping if you were actually "desensitized"



Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 12/15/2012 12:52PM by MJ.

Prevention? Guns locked up along with ammo ought to be required somehow..by law?
Violence is part of human behavior. That will never stop.
But, how to prevent it? I wonder if it can.
Horrible tragedies perpetrated by humans on other humans is part of human history whether we like it or not.
Doesn't soften the tragedy however.

"I also think we, as an American society, need to wake up to the fact that we celebrate violence and this is one of the predictable outcomes of doing so."

i'm sorry but i couldn't disagree more. there are almost 100,000 public schools in this country. if seeing violence on tv and games caused people to do this, there would be a lot more of these incidents.

this is most likely a random event resulting from a person with severe mental disorders who lives in a place where there are lax gun laws.

looking for meaning in this event is as fruitless as looking for meaning in the cult.

What bothers me is that the same tragedy keeps repeating. People want to stop guns but that does not stop the problem.

Over and over again the subject is mentally ill. Examples Columbine, Aurora Theater, VA TECH, Gabi Giffard, and ow Newtown.

The press never brings up the problem with mental illness in the US. The ones doing this will choose other weapons if guns are done away with, and it will not stop the problem.

There needs to not only be screening but some laws or rules to keep those dangerous in a secure place. Columbine kids parents were trying to get help, same with the aurora theater dude, same with gabi's attacker. The problem is lack of control and availability for mental illness help and it is rampant. That needs to make the news instead of gun control.
Perhaps more innocent people will be saved.

I agree that better access to mental health care is needed to try stop massacres like Newtown. Focusing on guns will not solve the problem.

Timothy McVeigh, the Oklahoma City bomber, killed 168 people, including 19 children. McVeigh did NOT use a gun.

Locking up guns and ammunition is appropriate under some circumstances, but not all circumstances. I am a senior citizen and fortunately I live in a low crime area. It gives me peace of mind to know that I can defend myself in the event of a home invasion robbery. My 80 lb. dog is my early warning system and hopefully a would-be robber would decided to go elsewhere when he hears the forocious barking of the dog. And meanwhile, I have two handguns ready in case the dog doesn't stop him. The handguns would be useless in that situation if they were locked up and unloaded.

When a person needs counseling, medication, or intervention, it can cost a lot of money to provide it.

But what's the cost of NOT providing it?

I know a kid who is currently on drugs, dropped out of school, and will probably end up in prison or dead. He didn't get the meds he was prescribed because they couldn't afford them.

to wanting to shoot ACTUAL people, or even having aggressive tendencies.

As far as I'm concerned, that sort of explanation is just silly. Everybody knows when it's a game (target practice) and when it's real.

I think violent entertainment is a factor.

The military was successful in getting soldiers to kill, rather than purposely shoot over the heads of the enemy, by making the practice of killing more realistic, and desensitizing them.

An experiment has been going on in human behavior with nobody setting up any controls on the negative effects. That experiment is showing kids and adults graphic enactments on TV of humans killing humans. We see so much graphic/realistic killing on TV. TV wasn't around for most of the time before the 1966 shooting, and what was around wasn't graphic at all.

Video games went from pac man's semi-circle self walking around eating up dots, to graphic and very realistic games of shooting and killing other humans. It is a game of practicing mass killing.

Some, and certainly the makers of the games and TV shows, would say that it has no influence on behavior. And yet the military, with unlimited sums of money that can be used for the best of the best of what works, chooses those same supposedly benign types of things to vastly improve their kill rates.

They had found that during WWII, soldiers weren't willing to kill most of the time. They shot over the heads of the enemy in order to not have to take the life of another human. They kept statistics on how many rounds of ammunition were used, and how many of the enemy were killed. Most who said that they were killing, weren't. After WWII they found that by making the practice/training more realistic, they could train people to stomach killing and take lives. We've been doing it for a few generations of soldiers and kids, using the same techniques.

There was one mass school killing in the 1700's, none in the 1800's, 1 between 1900 and 1966, and then they started. They take a huge leap in the 1980's, and just keep going up and up.

Violent entertainment also went up in that time period. Sure many get the same entertainment, and don't kill. But of those who are willing to take drastic measures, they are far more willing to make it a mass killing now.

THere were guns widely available for hundreds of years, there were school shootings for hundreds of years, but mass shcool shootings are a modern problem. They had the guns before, but they didn't use them in the same manner.

I don't know what changed, but something has changed.

and access to information giving the killers bigger ideas.

BTW, this article says there's no increase: http://www.sfgate.com/news/crime/article/No-rise-in-mass-killings-but-their-impact-is-huge-4121054.php

I have Asperger's. I'm socially very awkward. I was bullied daily in school, until I finally quit 3/4 of the way through Grade 12. My mother was always extremely critical and never satisfied. She never gave praise.

But I could not even fantasize about something like this. I'm just as horrified and heart-broken as anyone else.

I do think that we need to have much better resources for mental health, but I get a little concerned when the media starts throwing around labels. They just keep saying, "He may have had Asperger's." I'm like, "Okay, and ... what else?"

It reminds me of the OKC bombing. Dude was born socially awkward and with a dorky personality that meant he would never be well-liked. After years of taunting and rejection, they take it out on humanity.

People seem to forget there were many young children killed by Timothy McVeigh back in 1995. Just as senseless, just as evil as what happened in CT.

I mourned for those children and their families. I mourn for our country and society. I don't know the answer. But this has to stop. If gun control would fix this I would gladly give up my guns. But I don't think this is the problem. It is much deeper than that availability of guns. For better or worse, guns have been part of our culture from the beginning. It has only been the last 20 years where we have seen kind of indiscriminant violence. What has changed? Why are we doing this to ourselves?

It seemed to have started in 1966 with a sniper in a bell tower on a compus. It grew to a handful of intances in the 70's, then really started to take off in the 80's. The 90's and 2000's even more.

In the list I saw (can't find it now) from 1800 to 1966 there was only one mass killing at a school. It's a modern problem, but has been going on for about 46 years. It has really taken off for 20-30 years.

http://www.guardian.co.uk/world/2012/dec/14/gun-massacres-shootings-us-timeline

Virginia Tech 16 April 2007

Nickel Mines 2 October 2006

Red Lake high school 21 March 2005

Columbine high school 20 April 1999

Westside middle school 24 March 1998

University of Iowa 1 November 1991

Cleveland elementary school 17 January 1989

California State University 12 July 1976

University of Texas 1 August 1966

Forty six years of this and America is still dicking around. I'm angry. It doesn't happen elsewhere, despite mental illness' global impact.

Note that these are only the schools: not the theatres, churches, shopping centres, not the assassinations and high profile murders, not the domestic violence and street corner murders. Simply the school murders.



Edited 2 time(s). Last edit at 12/16/2012 04:40AM by Lorraine aka síóg.

Australia had a mass shooting in 1996 and decided to implement sensible gun control measures. They haven't had a mass shooting since and haven't given up their guns.

http://injuryprevention.bmj.com/content/12/6/365.full

Canada also had a mass shooting in the 90s and implemented "sensible" gun control. We have still had mass shootings. I understand that there was also a mass stabbing at a school
in China the other day.

We still lead all nations by exponential numbers in loss of life.

I can't think about it without crying.

I work at a catholic school. The principal cut class a little short at the end of the day and we had an all school prayer (about 900 high school kids) I don't know any more what I believe about god or prayer, but I know that coming together as a community was comforting to me on Friday. There is no excuse, no explanation that would satisfy me. I don't know if I can believe in a god that would let this happen or if I can buy the whole free agency thing either... But I know that people have the ability to hurt, to kill... And they have the ability to comfort and protect. I hugged my son a little tighter and I tried to be a little more loving today. What else can I do?

If what you propose were true, we'd have millions of mass murderers running around. Looking for an external scapegoat is silly. The mentally ill of this particular type are rare, but devastating. They won't disappear even if we only watched Disney movies from now on.

But hysteria will hunt for a scapegoat and demand all witches burn regardless.

Crazy people will always do crazy things. Banning weapons or video games or violent movies won't stop them.

However, what I think exacerbates the problem is the intense publicity that is given to the perpetrators. Their photos are splashed across the country, and their backgrounds are explored. Their friends, relatives, and acquaintences are interviewed in depth, and every minute detail of their lives is reported in the national media. Books and movies are often made about them. They see the publicity given to others, and they want the same thing. This is their way to gain their personal bit of fame. Even though they may kill themselves, they know that they will be famous.

I think the media should NEVER publish photos of the perpetrators of these heinous crimes, and give only minimal details about them (such as name, age, and that they were sick and pathetic people).

I believe that if you take away the attention and publicity that are given to these people, fewer will decide to follow that path.

My 2 cents.

Do we need guns that can fire 100s of rounds in seconds? Really? If you could only fire 6 shots and had to stop and manually reload the gun, it would give people time to get away or the police to respond.

Do we teach empathy in America? If a person is poor, hungry or homeless isn't that their fault? Don't we look down on such people? The mormon church certainly does. How is our social safety net compared to that of other countries? We always seem to have plenty of money for wars but need to gut social programs when ever possible.

And don't get me started on treating mental illness. I was appalled to hear church members say anyone who's depressed doesn't appreciate what they have or is not following the teaching of the church.

Why do we glorify violence, but photoshop sleeves on a young girl so her bare shoulders don't show? The bible and the BOM are filled with violence.

Finally, the only way a shooting will get noticed is a bigger body count or young victims. If this guy only shot his mother, it wouldn't be national news.

One of the horrible things about this event happening just before Christmas is that the holidays will be ruined for these families for many years, even decades, after they have come to terms with their grief.

Can you imagine these families having to look at Christmas trees and decorations, gifts, etc.?

My dad died just before Christmas, and the best thing that happened is that my brother packed the both of us up and we went to visit friends of his in California. There was no way that Christmas could proceed as usual that year. We had to do something really different.

I lost my Nana and my best friend (whose funeral was on Christmas Eve) when I was only 16 years old. They died just a few weeks apart. It's still something which constantly comes up in my mind at this time of year.

This will sadly affect the holidays of these families, probably for the rest of their lives.

It's all so sad. :(

I have two ideas I think should both be activated asap.

1) Give each teacher a lock-boxed weapon and training in how to use it. You can hear a mass murderer coming toward you firing a weapon. There is time for a teacher to get out the weapon and defend our children.

2) Pass laws mandating good quality mental health care and CHANGE THE CUSTOM OF WAITING UNTIL THERE IS A TRAGEDY. As it is now, only a stalking situation gets attention when clues are
present, before someone dies.

3) Pass laws prohibiting the distribution of mass murder video games. Sorry, guys, it is desensitizing our children to violence and we are now harvesting the result of murder as appropriate entertainment and Pay Back for injustices. Like giving up the deliciousness of having your own AK47 for your fantasies, likewise, killing innocent people vicariously in video games for FUN has got to stop. Our minds don't know the difference between our vicarious experiences and real experiences. Think about that.

Our society turned mentally ill people out of hospitals when drug therapy became an art form. Those same people ended up in jail for property destruction, drunk in public, vagrant, stealing, etc., because that's what mentally ill people do when they can't work. So our jails are packed with them and what do you think happens when they are released? Have they been in a therapeutic environment? NO. They have survived in the harshest violent living situation any of us can imagine. And now they are on the street with, as they say, "nothing to lose."

If you are unemployed and having a tough time finding a job, try being homeless, unemployed and having a prison stay on top of all that. We create this pool of angry, buff, mentally ill prison-mentality mentally ill people who have been pumping iron in anticipation of the moment when they can get their "free one."

My son told me he learned in prison that every crazy person gets a "free one," meaning a free killing. He said they won't give you the death penalty if you are schizophrenic or bipolar. They will just send you to a mental hospital, which is better than prison. He actually told me he wanted to kill my exhusband in revenge for what he did to his brother. He told me he had learned to kill with his bare hands and he told me exactly how. "He'll never see it coming." He actually planned to attend my next court date--HE WAS SERIOUS!

I talked him out of it (and changed the court date--not telling any family members what the new date was).

If he were able to pull it off, you can bet the first person the police would be questioning is me. I thought of all the times I'd said life would be so much simpler if he would just croak. I would be like that grandmother Bradshaw or whatever her name was--for sure they would think I put my son up to it and my little girls would all go to foster homes while I served jail time.

Memories-- it ain't all wholewheat bread.


Anagrammy




My son who died in 1994 told me in a burst of confidence once that he planned to shoot a bunch of strangers with a rifle. I asked him why. He said, "So they will stop laughing at me. I want to see the expression on their faces. I want to watch them die. I want the respect."

I took him to a psychiatrist immediately and he told him to stop drinking. He said, "Once you are sober, then let's see what we have. Come back then." I asked him if he told the shrink he planned to murder people. He answered, "No, because he didn't want to talk to me until I stop drinking." (California)

When this same son threatened his little sisters I called the police and they came and arrested him immediately and sent him to a psych evaluation in custody. This was in Utah.

Another time I took my other son (the one with schizophrenia) to the emergency hospital for a self-inflicted knife wound in the chest. On the way, he told me he would "kill" any male who tried to take off his clothing or ask personal questions. When we got to the hospital,I asked the intern who came into the room to examine him if I could speak to him privately. He said, "No, anything you have to say can be said in front of the patient. It's his body." I was going to warn him that he was in danger. (California)

I could give you other examples from my own experience. Once I had a hunch and dialed "last number called" on the phone and it was a gun shop. I called the police and reported that a mentally ill person was trying to buy a gun. They said they didn't care-- but that if he shot someone, I should call back. (this appalling reaction was in California)

My point is, there should be a standard of care, a protocol of handling a public complaint about someone who is demonstrating a lack of respect for human life or says they want to kill people.