Sadly my daughter miscarried 20 weeks into her first pregnancy. She has not believed since mid-90s. I'm a more recent unconvert.
It was very comforting to have the "It's no-ones fault, it's just one of those things" point of view, rather than trying to work out "god's purpose" for it.

Was it because she was wicked? Or that her and her partner aren't marriage? Or the fact they have gay friends and god wouldn't want a child growing up in that environment? Was it because I don't believe any more? Or any other such bollocks? (not swearing as my TBM dad said it once, and he's been a bishbop).

No, no-ones fault, just one of those things.

Unbelief is far more comforting than belief ever was!

Agreed!

It was hard for me to understand this when I was on the other side. It thought I found comfort in knowing "there was a plan". I thought randomness was empty and lonely. But now, the reality is, I am much less conflicted about bad things that happen. I still want to do as much as possible to make the world a better place and help people feel joy but I don't feel so tortured about bad things that happen.

I can just except that things are going to happen and that's that.

Absolutely.
Knowing that tragedy wasn't directed at you, but was random, is far more comforting than thinking that a deity *could* have prevented said tragedy if they wanted, but you didn't merit that importance (when TBMs constantly stare FPSes showing how they DID merit divine intervention).

Some people can think, "Oh well, it's all part of God's plan. Everything will work out in the end."

But others (like me when I was a Mormon) will agonize over what they did wrong. "What sin of commission or omission am I being punished for? Why isn't my faith juju working? I must be unworthy."

Not a good way to go through life.

Great post. So important to understand that unlike what we were told, the beauty of life is indeed being "of" the world, instead of being "in" the world.

This phrase, to be in the world but not of the world, is just another control tactic to keep you in the "Mormon world" where you pay your tax to the church and keep your blinders on so that you are never tempted to partake of the real, beautiful, innocent, difficult but honest life that this world offers.

You phrased that beautifully, "...the real, beautiful, innocent, difficult but honest life that this world offers."