So when people get up and bear their testimony about how much they love going to the temple, how much they 'learn' there, its their favorite place, and blah blah was I the only TBM going...really? Even as a TBM I always thought the temple was just okay and I guess sometimes I felt 'happier' afterwards...but for the most part I didn't really enjoy going. Honestly I thought everything was either weird, boring, or confusing. I also dreaded how long the sessions took especially if you missed the one you were planning on.

I felt exactly as you did. Over the years I asked many of my friends how they felt about their temple experiences. Realizing that 100% of them felt weird and awkward about all or parts of the temple experience helped me understand that we were all just playing a game of the Emperor's New Clothes.

+1

"Oh, it was wonderful, I learn something new and marvelous every time I go. Doors are opened for me, you know, the more you go the more it expands your understanding." And they turn back to watch that naked king walk by.

Noting is more obviously a put-on that the "I'd love to tell you but it's sacred" game...

Self promotion 100%


Anagrammy

Good analogy! Everyone wants to seem like they had a wonderful spiritual experience, otherwise other Mormons think there's something wrong with you. But really, everyone's just pretending the same thing! Its not a wonderful spiritual experience. It WEIRD!

If you tell someone that its actually weird and not wonderful, even though they secretly agree with you, they have to act like there is something wrong with you in order to avoid looking like there's something wrong with themselves as well.

Can I ask if maybe the happiness was just the ability to go? That since you got the recommend, and was therefore worthy, did that make a difference?

I think the 'happiness' came from a beautiful celestial room, a lot of meditation on life, and the feeling that I had fulfilled a responsibility to go to the temple.

To be honest the being worthy thing always scared me because I always felt like I needed days of preparation to repent of every little thing before going to the temple. I also dreaded spontaneous temple trips because what if I had a bad thought that day or listened to some bad music that day or whatever...because no unclean thing can enter the house of the lord. Planning to go to the temple was always stressful.

So maybe the happiness was relief afterwards of I'm not perfect but I'm trying as showed by attending the temple.

But all that being said I feel happiness regularly just living life.

Excellent observation! The king has no clothes! I'll never forget my first temple exsperiance! The Wierdness, The unchristless approaches to religion! All I could think of was"this is not of God" over & over. And everyone walking around like stepford wives w/goofy smiles. I looked at my future MIL(& her goofy smile) And all the gold painted furnature and crystal chandeller and though I dont care how lavish this place is; THIS IS WEIRD!! For years I thought God would explain it to me...never happened.

nevermoaz, Nah, most of us lied our @sses off during the recommend interview so that we could go because if we didn't go we would get shunned by friends and family - it was simpler to bury our heads in the sand, lie and then bear the unbearable burden of the 3 hour Mickey Mouse club with decoder ring and secret handshakes. Gee, what a bunch of morons we were.

Yes, but it's like that for church folk too.

My gf's dad will come home from his fundie x-ian church and say what a great time he had. I'll say, "what did you learn today?"

He'll respond with something along the lines of "oh, we talked about Paul and his missionary journeys.."

I'll say, "oh, you didn't know Paul went on missionary journeys?"

...

"So you didn't actually 'learn' anything, then. I see.."

*EDIT - this is a reply to Nevermoaz*

Not for me. I hated going through the interviews in order to get a recommend, so I it wasn't happiness I felt at being worthy, it was more relief that it was over. It was even better when they extended the recommends from one year to two, I had to endure renewing my tr less often.

Of course, I always had to suffer the guilt of not enjoying the show at God's holy house. More temple attendance = more boredom/weirdness, less temple attendance = relief but a huge increase in guilt.



Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 03/13/2013 01:35AM by daydream.

Things in the temple where probably more exiting when it was a live sex show back in the 1840's and 50's...

Yes, the donkey show was always the highlight.

I went through when the initiatories were a little more "risque". I learned from this, that people can get away with fondling you as long as it's under the guise of religion.

You're absolutely right! After growing up in the church, I was shocked during my first temple visit. I was freaked by the liberties that were taken during the initiatory. Later in the session when they asked if anyone did not want to go through with the commitments that would be made, I seriously considered raising my hand and getting the hell out of there. However, my parents were sitting right there with me....so parental pressure and 19 years of brainwashing took over and I stayed. I agree with the Emperor's Clothes analogy. I remember listening to friends tell about how they couldn't wait to wake up at 4:30 am in order to attend the first session of the day and how wonderful the temple was. I think that they just wanted to show others how spiritual they were by waking up so early.

Emperor's new clothes, that's what's going on.

I always thought it would be like general conference (which I liked at the time)--but more spiritual with a great message and I could just sit and enjoy listening. All that play acting and busy work. What a joke!

I never admitted to myself how much I detested the temple until I became an exmo, but I had grown up swearing I would be a regular temple attendee. I went 4 or 5 times (not counting the few weddings I went to). I'd rather go to the dentist than the temple.

One thing I do know is that I had to make it to the temple before I could ever leave the lds church. I would have always thought I was missing something marvelous--even with the stuff on the internet, I still had to experience it in real life to realize it was all a sham.

I thought it was weird and ridiculous about 10 minutes into my first session. My mind never changed.

The key to learning in the temple is to realize that there are hidden messages in Reformed Egyptian across your forehead. Most people mistake these revelations as marks from the elastic in the cap, and then miss out on "awesome learning experiences".

I always liked the celestial room. I knew I was less than 30 minutes from having a great meal and could sleep on the way home.

I'm thinking if you were born into an organzation, or brought into by by enthusiastic proselytizers, and were told over and over and over again that when you finally went into that Magic Treehouse where the most wonderful thing was going to happen, and then discovered that the magic thing was getting smacked up the side of your head with a rusty shovel, you'd come out saying: "Wow", even if all common sense deep inside you said: WTF!!??"

Thankfully, I never did go the temple. Instead I chose to spend my time doing something a lot more interesting -- I went to the railroad yard and watched the tracks rust.

Lucky!

But I was so brainwashed, and had such a low self esteem, that I thought I was too stupid, or too unworthy to 'learn' anything new.
When others around me kept saying they learnt something everytime.. By the time I had pretty much memorised the whole thing (didn't take long) I couldn't for the life of me figure out what I was supposed to be learning and I kept looking for hidden messages somewhere...

I never found them ofcourse.. and because of that I felt stupid and unworthy..

fucking cult..

When I was a HP group leader (very embarrassed now for this) I had monthly ward temple visits ------ in a Zion ward average attendance at the temple was 3-5 ----- really committed morbots! Actually, I did pray in the temple for answers and got a lot. Just didn't ask the right question until last year.

I did find a book about temple symbolism (from thesealedportion.com) I thought was pretty good on this subject ----- and have no clue why they should be able to produce something this good. As far as this site overall ----- I don't agree with most of their claims!

As far as the temple ceremony I think we all should be aware of how the cult has changed it over time -------- the god of Joseph Smith was not very good and so the temple rituals had to be changed over time to not scare the morbots from paying tithing or going on missions!

I always tried to look for meaning in the symbols and handshakes. Ridiculous waste of time. I wondered what it was that others were learning, and what was wrong with me to not be able to figure it out, but kept that to myself because it was too "sacred" to discuss anyway.

For those who have a temple in their back yard, I ask why don't you go everyday? If it is a place of god, the most wonderful of places, wouldn't you find an excuse to drop a daily task so that you can go to the temple every day?

I hated going to the temple. I always expected this great spiritual experience and ended up feeling alone and freaked out by the weird crap going on, which made me think there was something wrong with me because I thought it was weird.

I tried so incredibly hard and NEVER, EVER had even the slightest "spiritual" experience going to the temple. I felt borderline violated by the "entering the veil" stuff, it was so intrusive and it was just so strange and artificial. It was awful. The whole experience and especially the way it made me doubt myself and who I was and what I had experienced. I always felt that I was failing in some way because I hadn't had a spiritual experience and being in the temple just totally weirded me out and made me feel inadequate.

Horrible, horrible place.

Very well said.

I didn't enjoy it in the temple at all, but I always felt really good after I went, because I thought that I was genuinely helping a soul to progress in the afterlife. It just felt good because I was helping someone.

It was maddening to discover that they just go around recycling the names.

My first time to go to the temple was in 1980 and I was completely unprepared, even though I had been to those stoopid temple prep classes beforehand. I was not warned beforehand about the washing and annointing in preparation to put on those ugly g's for the first time and it was pretty darn creepy. I don't remember much from that first trip, but subsequent visits many times over many years I always felt confused. What did any of it have to do with Jesus and what did any of it have to do with those dumb super secret handshakes and why was there a punishment included with them? I stood many times in the prayer circle chanting pay lay ale or whatever it was.

A spiritual experience? Never. Not a single one. I always wondered if I could just talk to someone about it, have someone explain to me I'd understand. but no.

Gods, what an effing joke and waste of years of my life.

"The King's clothes, aren't they divine?"

http://www.umc.org/site/apps/nlnet/content3.aspx?c=lwL4KnN1LtH&b=2789393&ct=9135453

I remember the temple ladies, of whom I was the youngest, comment on how much happier patrons looked coming into the celestial room.
No shit, Sherlock.
Now we could pretend that the self-slashings were not what they were.
And, the new film was SO much nicer than the outdated plastic garden of theold films.ld

The Royal Couple who played Adam & Eve in the then-new 1990 film visited our temple one day when I was 'working' there...they might've been the f-ing Beatles, the way the elderly ladies mobbed them. Poor kids looked shell-shocked & fellow t-worker pushed me toward them, 'Go on! Meet them! You know you want to!'
Yikes!
I had all the rituals memorized & *still* learned nothing at the time.