Posted by:
enigma
(
)
Date: March 14, 2013 04:25PM
So here is my reply to the emails sent by my son's teacher... warning: LONG!!!
Mrs. _____,
Thank you for following up with more details into the issues that you alerted me to today. After reviewing the matter and discussing things with DS, I respectfully submit the following for your review.
With respect to DS's treating the hat/strainer as a toy, I have addressed the issue and DS understands that this is distracting to the class and he will refrain from doing it again. He understands the expectations for students with respect to classroom conduct and will redouble his efforts to comply with school policy in that regard.
I would like to spend a little time responding to the other concerns stated in your original email. I will speak to each point individually so as to facilitate a clearer understanding of our position(s) on these matters. I apologize in advance for the length of this response but I needed to make sure that I thoroughly covered all of the points you brought up. For convenience, I have included your quotes in italics.
1. "I understand religious practices however I question his motive with this new accessory."
Implicit in ‘understanding’ others mythological beliefs/practices is the realization that the motives of an adherent are, quite frankly, no ones business. I will use the following example in each of the points of concern that I address: If a practicing Jew were to walk into your classroom wearing the Kippah ( כִּפָּה), as most practicing orthodox Jews do, would you take the time to email that child's parents questioning his/her motives for wearing the symbol of his mythology? If I insert the Islamic Burqa or the Catholic Rosary, the question would be the same.
Just because a religious practice is unfamiliar or strange, that does not warrant calling into question the motives of those who choose to follow a mythological tradition in whatever manner they see fit. Similarly, I doubt that you would ever question the motives of an 8-year-old adolescent who chooses to don white ceremonial clothing, walk into a large tub, and be submerged in order to join his/her parents mythological construct. By that age standard, DS is more than old enough to choose to wear a symbol of his chosen mythology and the argument could be reasonably made that his motives are more legitimate than the 8-year-old mentioned previously as he has made this decision free from the constant and pervasive indoctrination of his parents since his birth. His decision to wear the prescribed head piece for a practicing Pastafarian was made completely independent of input from either his mother or myself.
2. "My main problem with this is... that he... is being extremely disrespectful of other religion. He does not have the right to judge other and make comments that make them feel uncomfortable for their choices."
I asked DS about this issue and he related the following to me:
DS was walking by another student in the process of (most likely getting his bell work out of his folder) when the student asked DS: "Why do you believe in that kind of stuff? It's really weird..." To which DS replied: "That's like me saying that you believe in some hippie dude living in some heaven beyond space..."
In addition to this, DS has come home in tears on several occasions from being subjected to ridicule by several other LDS students who, for some strange reason, thought it was appropriate to promote their particular mythology and demean DS for not participating in their myth club. So my question to you is: Have you sent a similar email to the offending student's parents for his blatant discriminatory behavior and, could I please see the copy of that email - as I'm sure that you're dedicated to treating this episode with impartiality to any particular mythological construct? DS is made to feel uncomfortable for not believing in the dominant cultural mythology on a routine basis. What are you and your staff doing to ensure that no one is made to feel uncomfortable for not participating in that dominant mythology?
If I am to understand the situation correctly, DS was only pointing out an observational parallel regarding the irony of persecuting someone for their beliefs while subscribing to a mythology that is, by any objective standard, just as ridiculous as the belief system that the persecutor is choosing to single out. The only difference between the two students, as I see it, was that DS was mature enough to point out the parallel in mythological absurdity and let the whole issue rest at that - while the offending student, it would seem, is behaviorally incapable handling a conversational rebuttal to his discriminatory behavior and choose to whine about it to a teacher.
So, I propose the following: If the school is willing to enforce a rigorous exclusion of the discussion or promotion of any mythological construct in any way, shape or form on school property with the exception of observing mythology's role in a historical context, then all students can interact and learn in an environment where the potential of being persecuted (as my son has been on several occasions by LDS students - and which students have never been upbraided for their bigotry and intolerance) is markedly reduced - if not altogether eliminated.
3. "He refused to take his hat off all day in multiple classes. And in my class I had to ask Mr. ____ to help with the issue... I just need to verify that he is in fact part of the spaghetti monster religion from Kansas City."
I asked DS about this issue and these were his remarks:
"In 1st period, Miss _____ asked me to take off the hat and I did and then I started playing with it (which I have addressed with DS) and she took it away from me. At the end of the period we had a talk about playing/fiddling with stuff and then [she] gave it back to me to put into my back pack. In 2nd period, Mr. ____ told me to take it off and I did but I was acting (in drama class) so I didn't play with it. In 3rd period, Mr. ____ let me keep it on because he said that, legally, I don't have to take it off. In 4th period, I took it off myself because I was in dance class and I didn't want it to fall off. And then at lunch Mr. ____ told me I had to have permission to wear it so I went to the principal's office but he was in a meeting. So I took it off for lunch and then put it back on to go to science class which was my final period."
So if I am to understand this all correctly, the only issue of concern that I see is that of playing with the hat like a toy during class. I will point out that there seems to be some confusion as to what is or is not allowed with respect to mythological accessories or trappings (as evidenced by Mr. _3rd period_ comments), In fact, the day prior, Mr. _3rd period_ advised DS that he should wear the hat/strainer if he truly was a Pastafarian and then took the time to show his class yesterday, via overhead projector, that Pastafarianism was indeed an established religion.
While DS has grown somewhat accustom to the fact that many LDS children are patently incapable of realizing that people do, in fact, believe different things than they do; he is always confused that they cannot see the absurdity of their own belief system when it is lined up beside other equally absurd belief systems. Honestly, I believe the simplest way to solve this issue is to allow DS to wear his mythological attire of preference as you would, I assume, allow the Jew to wear the Kippah, the Muslim to wear the Burqa, the Catholic to wear the Rosary, or the Mormon to wear the temple garment.
Also, I need clarification as to this supposed school policy of verifying the membership or adherence of every student to the mythology that they proclaim adherence to. Could you please forward to me the section of your policies/bylaws/etc. that delineate this practice as I've never heard of a school, public or charter, engaging in such a blatant violation of an individual's privacy or civil liberties. If such a policy is included in your bylaws then I would, respectfully, like to receive said copy and submit it to a trusted friend of mine who is an attorney for review.
In closing I would like to state for the record that my wife and I are fully supportive of the school's efforts to maintain appropriate behavior in class. As Mr. _3rd period_ will attest to, we have been very cooperative in working with him to correct DS's distracting behavior issues when they arise - to the point of even shadowing him in class as needed. If DS persists in playing with his hat, he understands that he will not be allowed to wear it.
However, with respect to the other points you brought up, I must offer the above as my understanding of the situation and my rebuttal of certain assumptions/positions offered up in your original communiques. DS's choice to adhere to Pastafarianism and wear a pasta strainer may seem strange or even silly and many may be wont to dismiss his choice on those grounds. But, I would politely remind you that the majority population in this state adhere to a mythology that includes, among other strange oddities, the following in its lexicon of belief: Disappearing gold plates, an invisible ghost that inhabits a person's heart, atonement for sins through human sacrifice, an anthropomorphized man/god that lives near a star called "Kolob", and a myriad of other peculiarities that, for anyone outside that construct of belief, would seem equally strange and silly.
While we have taught DS to respect individuals and their choices of belief, we reject the idea that belief systems themselves must be immune from scrutiny, criticism, and rebuttal. And while DS will NEVER actively denigrate the personal beliefs of another, rest assured that if someone approaches him and attempts to point out the absurdity of his beliefs, he WILL CERTAINLY offer a simple and appropriate observational parallel in rebuttal. So long as the school does nothing to prevent LDS children (or any other myth-club adherents) from persecuting and vilifying those that don't happen to belong to their respective myth club, I will not prohibit DS from defending his right to believe as he chooses and pointing out the hypocritical absurdity of any believer denigrating the mythology of another. It's a classic case of the pot calling the kettle black and we've taught DS to treat it as such.
I hope this helps you to understand our position. Again, DS understands that if he continues to play with the strainer, he will not be allowed to wear it. And I trust that, from this point forward, my son's adherence to his mythology of choice will be subject to the same respect and treatment that other students are accorded.
Thank you for your time.
Respectfully,
Enigma.