I need some advice.

I'm finding since moving to UTah, especially, that people do not like to take responsibility for their actions or those of their children. It's so crazy and annoying.
I grew up in California and was raised to be overly accountable for anything and everything I did. At times it was hard and uncomfortable but I think I'm a better person for it.

First I worked in the school system on an elementary level when I first moved here. More often then not, I noticed that the Kids were always being rescued by their parents, tons of excuses made and the kids would be defended by their parents even before they had any of the facts. It would just blow my mind.

BUt, My particular problem is this, my daughter was stopped at a stop light and was hit from the back by a 30+ something guy who was towing a trailer and just couldn't stop. When the cop came this guy was sighted because he didn't have insurance even though he kept claiming he did. We had all of his info and tried to get in touch with him. At first he was very willing to take care of the car and wanted us to go to a certain place to get it fixed. HE got an estimate without the car there so we took the car to where we normally go to see if it was comparable. When we told him we wanted to take it to this other place is when we had a hard time getting in touch with him.Our daughter was also going to need a rental because she is 20 and has a job. She paid for most of this car herself and was hit another time, this women wanted to give her a cash payout less the the repairs and she still had it fixed. She is not interested in the money but only having her car restored to it's original shape.

Anyway, since we weren't hearing form this guy my husband went to his house YES, he was surprised and seemed embarrassed. He explained that he wanted to go to this certain shop because the owner would give him a deal. My husband said no problem because we weren't trying to be jerks. We agreed and also told him not to worry about the rental car, we would work out our car situation.

So, my daughter tried to call and make an appointment. This shop was like 2 months out. Where our guy could have taken it that week. We texted the guy and told him that was too long and for him to call and set something up sooner. That is where the trail ends. It's been a week and he has not gotten back to us.


My husband wants to give him more time, he may not have the money. He didn't say that but after he pays the $1,000 (for lack of insurance) fine he may not have any money.BUT, I am worried because this happened in another situation where a teenager hit me and then after we gave her a couple of months to tell her father she told him another story and he said "who should I believe you or my daughter?" And I said, "it depends on what kind of daughter you are trying to raise." and he laughed!(we handled it poorly but that was our first experience in trying to get money from someone in Utah)


So, how can we make him pay for the damages? He has given us no reason recently to make us think he is going to take care of this and the longer it goes on the less likely he will pay.

Any experience with this or advice.

I'm not sure if I'm just being overly justice oriented which I can be or if he deserves to be hunted down!!! It really makes me mad that sometimes people just don't do the right thing!!

Don't get bull dozed over. If your husband is comfortable with it, I would stop by and see him one more time. Tell him that he needs to take responsibility for his actions, and if he is not willing to do that then you will have no choice but to take legal action.

It is not your fault he didn't have insurance.
It is not your fault that he can't afford it.
It is not your DAUGHTER'S fault for being in the wrong place at the wrong time.
It is not your fault for not wanting to wait 3 months for work that could be really bad and not the right fit for your car.

It IS your fault if you let him get away with it.

Hey Luvcake,

If you're in Salt Lake, call this guy... Russell Gray at 801-305-4851. He's an attorney that deals with that kind of thing. He's really good. I've sent a lot of clients to him. Never a complaint.

Take him to court. He is stalling.
He will not pay you. If he was a responsible person he would have insurance. File in court today. Take the car to your shop and get an appraisal, soon. Get the police report also. You need to take action now, don't put it off.

Good luck.

Thanks for your replies-

We live in utah County so SLC is not far. Also will taking him to court or getting a lawyer cost ME a lot. I don't know how that works? The damages were about $2,000. Thanks!

Call Russ, he shoots straight. This kind of stuff is his specialty.

Oh, and you can mention this board. He's a "friend".



Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 05/23/2013 05:24PM by Bite Me.

Get his committment in writing or recorded in some way. Maybe a recorded phone conversation? (I don't know if Utah requires notification to record a conversation or not...)

That will at least prepare you for a worst-case situation, so you don't end up like the "who should I believe" situation again.

Welcome to Utah, and welcome to the concept of trashy, irresponsible people who go to church every Sunday.

rationalguy Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> Welcome to Utah, and welcome to the concept of
> trashy, irresponsible people who go to church
> every Sunday.

That's what it feels like.
We fell into the trap of if a mormon neighbor says he'll pay for damage then he will because he's mormon and mormon's don't lie.

What if I just scared him by saying I was going to talk to his bishop? Is there any fear in that for a member? :)



Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 05/23/2013 04:55PM by luvcake.

Unless you have uninsured motorist's coverage you may be out of luck. If you lack uninsured motorist's coverage, an attorney will probably be unwilling to take your case, especially if there were no injuries (whiplash, etc.).

Is there a small claims court in Utah? If so, do you have repair receipts and the man's driver's license info, or driver's plate number or other identifying info? You may be able to get a judgment against him for the repair amount, but that doesn't mean that he will ultimately cough up the money.

Yes, Utah has its share of irresponsible people, but being from California (your former state), you know the amount of uninsured driver's traveling the roads these days. What if he had totaled your car, or injured you or your family and sent you all to the hospital, and you lost your job because of your injuries or disabilities? You would have been SOL.

So ultimately, you must take responsibility for your own sake.

I suggest you try and visit the man one more time, and really lower the boom on him. If he doesn't respond, then proceed to small claims court, if it is an option in your state, and if you meet the monetary damages ceiling or guidelines.

I wouldn't deal with him *at all*. This is the job of your auto insurance company. File a claim. Hopefully your daughter has uninsured motorists' coverage.

I'm at a loss as to why people seem so reluctant to file claims. As long as you don't make a habit of getting into accidents, the amount that your insurance goes up is quite minimal.

Another reason to let your insurance company deal with the other driver is legal liability. Anything, and I mean *anything* that you say to the other driver can come back to bite you. This is why the classic advice when you are in an accident is to trade necessary information only (driver's licence, registration, and insurance,) and ask if the other driver is okay (or needs immediate medical assistance.) Don't discuss the accident, and for heaven's sake, don't apologize, even if you were in the wrong.

If your insurance won't cover this, go to a shop of your choice and file against him in small claims.



Edited 3 time(s). Last edit at 05/23/2013 07:54PM by summer.

I used to work auto/property claims for Allstate. What everyone has said about UMPD is accurate. If you have it or even collision on the policy, file a claim with your insurance. They will pay for the costs with you only paying your deductible, provided you have the coverage. Save ALL receipts, because it's possible to be reimbursed for any windfall from the accident including wage losses.

Provided you have the correct coverage, your company will pay the mechanics fees, including a rental if you have it after you pay the deductible. After the company has paid for your repairs (legally, you are allowed to choose ANY mechanic you want), they will subrogate the liable party because they want their money back. It's possible you will even get the deductible back.

Unfortunately, if you don't have the coverage, your insurance company can't help you. Aside from PDL (required in most states), UMPD and Comp coverage are the best add on covarges to protect your ass. There are SOOO many people driving around without insurance.

Get him to say he'll fix it in front of another mormon.... that might help...

Am I the only one who finds it offensive that the government fine of 1000 for no insurance is paid before the victim?