I'm mad at myself. I'm mad I believed all this. I'm mad I believed this was the "one true church". I HATE that I believed that the adulterous polygamous pervert Joseph Smith was a prophet. I'm mad at myself for believing so long that gays, lesbians, etc. that they had a choice. I didn't think they were evil, and I always thought "well if they love each other, that's what counts.". I always thought they chose who they dated, and now that I know better it bugs me. Just everything of this makes me so mad. Seminary is becoming ridiculous. Today we talked about church and you know, it didn't sound like he felt any better after the three hours, he just focused on how hard it is. I NEVER feel the "spirit" on Sundays. And whenever I've felt the "spirit" it's more been inner peace, and that doesn't exist on Sundays. You know what I wake up to? EVERY SUNDAY? My siblings. Fighting. Over ANYTHING! I don't know how my parents see this. I have come to sleeping all day Sundays just so I don't have to deal with this family on Sundays. Because we don't even act like a family!

A few more things. It makes me mad that they fought against equal rights for women without actually saying WHY. Sure they had the mask on that answered the questions but I know it's just a mask. It even makes me more ticked that they spent MILLIONS of DOLLARS to fight against equal rights for those who want to marry the same gender. As if it was an attack on them! These people deserve an equal life just like the rest of us. The $3 mill mall makes me mad, and I can go on and on and on. But I won't. How long does this "anger" stage last?

*sigh*



530 more days.



Edited 2 time(s). Last edit at 01/25/2011 10:24AM by anon123.

It might last awhile, especially because you are still in your parent's house.

All I can suggest is that while your anger is justified, don't let it consume you. You will have your freedom eventually. Keep busy with school and recreational activities. The misery will be over eventually.

In my case, currently 25 years.

Still feel all the emotions you do. I live in a small morg town. I see the kids in DI clothing at Christmas time, I see the rusted wrecks in the lot of the "church" on #Sundays. I see men who smile like a robot if they see me, but I know they live in silent agony (a few not so silent but if I repeat what they say they'd deny it).

I've said this before, so skip it if it's familiar, but I really do wish it was true. Then all of his anguish would have been for something.

Good for you for coming to the right conclusions. Anger is a tool, not a weapon, use it to move forward.

You are SO lucky you saw the light at your young age, you now have your entire life ahead of you. Congrats!

That depends on the type and size of the rock.

In your case, it will probably last as long as you are at home and not completely in control of how much LDS Inc is rubbed in your face. Like you said, 530 days.

On the bright side, 530 days will pass, and even a good portion of those 530 days will not involve LDS Inc. Take the long view.