I've left the church and my wife who I still love very much is making life a misery and my grown children are doing all they can to push me out of my marriage in the hope that their mother will marry some righteous mormon. Not much I can do. I've become a family of one, no light at the end of the tunnel.Just need to vent, I hate this stupid church, it a cult that's what it is. I know of no mainstream church that has this kind of effect on families. I hope I can hang on.

Do you really want to be a part of a family that treats you that way?

My thought is that he loves his children and it breaks his heart that they are so brainwashed. Guilt feelings from having been a Mormon Dad, and contributing to that brainwashing, can seem overwhelming.

I'm really sorry anon, it is REALLY rough!!!! And VERY hypocritical of your family. As I have always thought, I don't remember the vows in the temple saying anything about ;unless one of you leaves the Church;, but that is the way it seems to be.

Hang in there love, and come and rant here as often as yoiu need to!

Jesus himself said to a man once... Let the dead bury the dead.

My entire family refuse to even listen, but as hard as it is sometimes to bear, they are spiritually dead already. They are being blinded by the god of this world - Satan.

You must get yourself cleaned up and learn how to take spiritual authority over the Devil.

Find a local ex church meetup group in your area and get connected. Jesus died for everyone and he wants all to accept him and to know the truth. NOT Joesph's Myth, but the I AM.

God is with you and will provide you strength if you will trust in him and get into relationship with him.

I have fallen so in love with my time with him. I have been knocking out 1 hour a day in the Bible. You can read the entire Bible every 90 days in just 1 hour a day.

May God bless you on your path and the Holy Spirit comfort you from the inside.

I'm curious if you spend as much time on the parts that show the bi-polar I AM endorsing slavery, genocide, tribalism, rape, murder, pillaging, and the subjugation of women as you do on the parts where he puts mud in people's eyes and turns water to wine?

Yes. Know the truth and the truth shall make you free--from Jesus too.

Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 08/05/2013 10:03AM by blueorchid.

mesajwilson Wrote:
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>
>
> You must get yourself cleaned up and learn how to
> take spiritual authority over the Devil
>
>
WTF?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!??!

Sorry to hear of your troubles. It's our misfortune to have been unwillingly thrust into the grip of a cult--an ANTI-family cult. RfM is a great place to share and vent.

Hang in there!

: )

THIS IS SO HORRIBLE! That grown children would turn on you like that!!! I really feel your pain! I wish church families would see how unchristian that is! Once when talking to an explyg. about missing my family; she gave me some good advise. she told me to find one member in the family who will talk to you & work on that, as a means of communication. Outside of that, Id say find a church that will give you moral support. VENT ALL you want! WERE all here for you. I'll pray for you good luck!

Fuck Man!!!! If you played scared and status quo you will lose...
Your wife has to choose you first.

I don't recall how many many times my step kids try to pull this shit on me (mine was an orthodox Jewish Patriarchy BS).
By all means....Have your Mother, if she chooses CULT & you over me.

Especially if those idiots are grown & has nothing to say in the matter.

Stand your ground.



Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 08/05/2013 09:32AM by quinlansolo.

I'm so sorry. It breaks my heart the way this religion controls everyone who is in it. To think that God would sanction your family being ripped apart because you're "apostate" is SO wrong. I thought about divorcing the love of my life- when it finally hit me...I CAN'T BELIEVE IN A GOD THAT WOULD WANT THAT. That is when I started researching. My parents don't know that I've left TSCC yet. When my little sister left, they were absolutely horrible to her. My father told her that she couldn't be around the grandkids because she was contaminating them just by her presence. Very Christlike indeed. I hope the very best for you. I'll pray for your comfort. I hope that you feel the love and support from those of us on RFM who completely understand what you're going through. Keep us updated.

I second the sentiment to encourage you to stand your ground. You be the example to them of integrity, honesty, and truth. Maybe they will see the light from your life.

I think I would start by changing your will. The second thing I would do is to specifically let all of your kids know about it. Are these step children or ones by birth?



Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 08/05/2013 09:57AM by Bite Me.

Worst situation. Just stay strong and look for people who do like you for who you are. You need real friends when you don't have real family. I hope they come around.

Quote to your family the words of the apostle Paul:

"...If any brother hath a wife that believeth not, and she be pleased to dwell with him, let him not put her away.
13 And the woman which hath an husband that believeth not, and if he be pleased to dwell with her, let her not leave him.
14 For the unbelieving husband is sanctified by the wife, and the unbelieving wife is sanctified by the husband: else were your children unclean; but now are they holy.
15 But if the unbelieving depart, let him depart. A brother or a sister is not under bondage in such [cases]: but God hath called us to peace.
16 For what knowest thou, O wife, whether thou shalt save [thy] husband? or how knowest thou, O man, whether thou shalt save [thy] wife?" 1 Corinthians 7:12ff

This +1

I don't see how I can forgive the church as an organization when there are those at the top who perpetuate the lies and abhorrent behaviors of members knowing fully well about the lies and what the members are doing. They never preach AGAINST such things as shunning or breaking up of families when a spouse leaves the church. But they will adamantly say they don't preach in favor of such things when they know very well they are wide spread in the church. It's cowardly and deceptive. They are still sinning by omission. Not revealing the truth when all about you are trusting your leadership and believing a lie is a sin of omission in my opinion.

When families are in crisis due to TBMs willing to divorce no longer believing spouses, I find it unimaginable that the GA's never mention the importance of keeping families whole at general conferences. They turn down the lights, rise to the lectern and begin their repetitive, monotone blather about praying, paying tithing, staying away from church history studies (that is about the only thing they preach AGAINST) and, I'll bet anything, this October it will be a big push for missionary work. It would be astounding if something inspirational was actually said during General Conference. The real preaching is handed down in the form of official letters from COB to stake presidents and bishops. The General Conference stuff is JUST FOR SHOW.

If the wife does not chose you,walk away.

But ask her first to talk to some divorcees in the church and how their life is going.

I'd be up front with her and ask if she still wants to be married to you or if she wants you to set her free. Tell her you will never be Mormon again so she can kiss that option goodbye. If she says she wants to remain married to you tell her then to shut up forever about preaching the party line to you. That you don't care and you won't see and will never be convinced. After that tell your kids you are angry at them for even thinking about attempting to break up your marriage and they should back off on that because this is YOUR FAMILY!! And no one will push you out or take it over. And if they don't want to be in your family then they can leave. If you have to be a family of 1 then so be it!! But they choose to walk away. You won't be pushed out.



Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 08/05/2013 11:42AM by snuckafoodberry.

I can't offer better advice than all of the above RFM'ers. All I want to say is I am so sorry you are going through this. And that I have been there -- or almost there. I'm a never-mo but part of the reason I started lurking here over a year ago was because of all the pain & anger pent up over not just what they did to one of my two stepsons & how they were attempting to indoctrinate my step daughter behind my back, but also how they aggressively pressured my husband to pressure ME to give 10 percent of my income to the "church" because he was unemployed at the time & way broke thanks to paying for his tweaker ex's child support. They were also well & pissed off that I refused to set foot in their "church" with my husband, who started attending when his ex started attending to get free food from the church thanks to her then-friend & fellow tweaker who's an off & on-again Mormon, so they could sell their EBT for cash & still feed their kids. Oh god anyway -- if you're still a Christian take mesajwilson's advice because to have people that are going through this themselves, no matter how they define themselves, is so, so wonderful. Like was said above, to find out that you have in effect no family is when you need real friends. I'm not a Christian myself, I'm a practicing Buddhist & if that was the only group around me at the time of my war against the invasive Mormons, so to speak, I would have gladly dived into a group like that for support. My support thankfully came from my Buddhist group & my family & friends -- live in CA, makes a big difference I've learned on this board whether you are in heavily LDS state or not. Anyway (((HUG)))

Thank you all very much for your support and advice. I am not giving up on my family.

I definitely seen things get much better for some people I know after everyone got over the initial shock, and started to let their real feelings for each other come through again. I hope this is the case for you. All the best.

Anon, I was in a very similar situation 7 years ago. I did my research & just could no longer accept & believe in the church. This caused all kinds of problems with my wife of 38 years. We had six children who were out of the home except for our youngest disabled daughter. I, like you, did not want to have this breakup our marriage & fought hard to keep it intact.

In my case I do not think my grown children tried to influence my wife one way or another. I felt strongly that the marriage should continue even if she continued to believe in the church (which is her right and a personal choice) while I knew I could not anymore. Despite all I could do, she did leave me & we were divorced. She told me her advice from our ward & stake leaders was not to stay with me if there was no chance I would change my mind. Neither one of us are now that happy & are having our problems & it probably would have been better if we had stayed together & worked our way through it.

I can only wish you the best & hope that you & your spouse can find a way for you both to be happy & keep your family intact if it is possible.

I like snuckafoodberry's attitude.

This is YOUR family! A stupid, fake, polygamous cult does not belong in the middle of your marriage. (Even so, the marriage vows in the temple say that the new husband and wife are sealed "in the everlasting covenant" of the Mormon church. They marry the church, and don't even know it.)

Your adult children were taught in Primary, that their family will not be a "forever family" if one of their parents becomes "a wicked apostate", and that is a fate worse than death for you. Bla-bla. The brain-washing was done years ago.

Why can't we just yell out the Truth, and cry, and throw a tantrum, like the Mormons do to us? Tell your kids you will dis-inherit them if they stay in the cult, because they will give 10% of it to the cult, and you don't want that. A lot of our neighbors dis-inherited their children for not going on a mission, not getting married in the temple, and for being gay, etc. Why can't ex-Mormons be tough, too?

You are a good guy, and a "catch." Maybe you ought to flex your muscles and threaten to divorce your wife. Accuse her of alienating your children!

Religion has no place in a marriage, and that is the truth! If you take your wife out to dinner, or to a movie, or for a drive, or make love to her--all this has nothing to do with religion. Take your adult children fishing, or to a ball game, and if they bring up the subject of religion, tell them that what you are doing right how has nothing to do with religion. (I don't allow religion in the work place, and everyone abides by that.)

My husband got tough. He told me what snuckafoodberry said, and he stood his ground. He called TSCC a hoax and a cult, and told me that it was absolutely false, and that he would not support it in any way, or give one dime to it. He said he would not give me any money, unless I promised to not pay tithing on it. He said the children and I were free, just as he was free, and that he would not stop us from going to church, and would not give us a hard time. After this initial talk, he kept his word. He would answer questions, and that was all. He did tempt us with fun and happiness, and love. We began enjoying our Sundays more. The answers my husband gave me made sense. Especially, the nasty way the Mormons, and my husband's TBM family treated my husband, made us happy to leave. Mormonism is not about love. It is not about Christ. It is not about families. It is easy to find the flaws in their stupid scriptures and history, once you realize that.

Since Mormons rely on "feelings" for their testimonies, you can begin there, like my husband did. Point out what the Mormons are doing and saying, and let the cult shoot itself in the foot. Time is on your side. Don't panic at this stage.

Remember, Mormonism keeps its members through FEAR.

I'm sorry you are going through something so UNNECESSARY, but I know you have the courage and love to get you through this.