Posted by:
steve benson
(
)
Date: August 14, 2013 10:02PM
--The Greatest Story Never Gold: Not only was there no gold to back up Joe's phony Kirtland bank notes, there was no gold-crammed caves inside the Hill Cumorah--
It's a matter of historical record that Joseph Smith's Mormon Church co-inventer, Oliver Cowdery, couldn't get his magic dowsing stick to function when it came to the Book of Mormon's translation junction.
Yet, despite this fundamental failure on Ollie's part, he supposedly was able to locate caves in the Hill Cumorah piled high with ancient plates.
Grant Palmer, in his book "An Insider's View of Mormon Origins” [Salt Lake City, Utah: Signature Books, 2002], describes the “discoveries” thus:
“The ability to see into hidden crevices within the local hills was not limited to Joseph Jr. and his father. Heber C. Kimball spoke of 'the vision that Joseph and others had [Joseph Sr. and Oliver Cowdery are identified] when they went into a cave in the Hill Cumorah and saw more records than 10 men could carry . . . books piled upon tables, book upon book.'
"[Brigham] Young named more witnesses in connection with these visits to Cumorah's cave . . . : 'Oliver says that when Joseph and Oliver went there, the hill opened and they walked into a cave, in which there was a large and spacious room. He says he did not think, at the time, whether they had the light of the sun or artificial light; but that it was just as light as day. They laid the plates on a table; it was a large table that stood in the room. Under this table there was a pile of plates as much as two feet high and there were altogether in this room more plates than probably many wagon-loads; they were piled up in the corners and along the walls. The first time they went there the sword of Laban hung upon the wall; but when they went again it had been taken down and laid upon the table across the gold plates . . . . I tell you this as coming not only from Oliver Cowdery, but others who were familiar with it . . . . Carlos Smith . . . was a witness to these things. Samuel Smith saw these things, Hyrum saw a good many things but Joseph was the leader.' . . .
"In 1873 Brigham Young informed Elizabeth Kane and others that the plates that Cowdery saw 'were in a cave; that Oliver Cowdery . . . would not deny that he had seen [and handled] them. He had been to the cave.'” Palmer adds that “Hyrum Smith related more about [Cowdery's Cumorah spelunking) to William W. Phelps, identifying still others who made the excursion to the hill's interior. Phelps recounted: 'Joseph, Hyrum, Cowdery and Whitmer[s?] went to the Hill Cumorah. As they were walking up the hill, a door opened and they walked into a room about 16-feet square. In that room was an angel and a trunk. On the trunk lay a Book of Mormon and gold plates, Laban's sword, Aaron's breastplate.'” In this regard, Palmer adds that in another statement, Young mentioned that they saw “ 'a Messenger' who was the 'keeper of the room' and that they conversed with him.”
Palmer raises doubts that Cowdery physically located such gold-crusted caverns, noting that Brigham Young's version of “recounted statements by Cowdery [of walking into a treasure-laden cave inside the Hill Cumorah] . . . may have been misremembered [as] . . . real events rather than visionary”--serving to further underscore that Cowdery was “seeing” things with his magic stick. Palmer notes, “It appears that this cave was not a physical reality but rather something that was visited in a dream-vision” by Cowdery and others."
Ya think?
Jerald and Sandra Tanner, in their book, "The Changing World of Mormonism" (Chicago, Illinois: The Moody Bible Institute/Moody Press, 1980-81), quote LDS apostle Bruce R. McConkie in his "Mormon Doctrine":
"It is reported by President Brigham Young that there was in the Hill Cumorah a room containing many wagon loads of plates {p. 454)."
Mormonism certainly carries wagon loads of something, but it ain't gold plates.
As the Tanners observe:
"An ordinary person would probably see nothing of importance about this hill but to Mormons this is one of the most important places on Earth."
Indeed, making a mountain out of a bull hill.
_____
No gold in Joe's Kirtland "bank" vault.
No gold in Joe's Hill-Cumorah under-the-stone-box vault.
Psssst, Joe: Cut your losses and build a mall.