I don't understand why some people leave their names on the rolls...
If it won't cause 'problems' in your life, why would you leave your name on?

These are the reasons I can think of for NOT leaving your name on:
-authenticity
-not having to worry about them contacting you
-not having to worry about them trying to reactivate you
-the church is numbers driven, so why bolster their numbers by leaving your name on?

Are there more reasons either side?

I refuse to play by their rules. I have not attended nor paid tithing for almost 9 years. I am no longer a member, period. I don't recommend this for all as I agree, in general, it is better to formally resign.

To answer your Points :-

"These are the reasons I can think of for NOT leaving your name on:
-authenticity
I do not class myself as a Mormon as stated above.
-not having to worry about them contacting you
They don't contact me after 3 different Area Presidents tried.
-not having to worry about them trying to reactivate you
They don't. Even Elder Holland said he doesn't care what I do.
-the church is numbers driven, so why bolster their numbers by leaving your name on?
Resigning does not reduce their fictitious numbers. You will still be counted in their claimed 14.7 million members, instead of the 4 million they actually have.

Let me emphasise I am not advocating this for everyone. Most people will feel better if they formally resign and it sends a message to those who process the resignations. (We also send a strong message by not attending and nor paying tithing). Some will not formally resign for family reasons. I know exmos who will wait until their parents die before they formally resign.

I think whatever a person decides is right for them, to resign or not, is OK. It is a personal decision.

I stopped being a member the moment I decided I was no longer a member. It's none of my business or concern what symbols that church has scribbled on their internal documents.

Submitting a letter of resignation (in my mind) is tantamount to asking permission. It's like saying I don't have the power to make my own decisions or decide my own course.

Some people believe their resignation isn't "real" until they've notified the church. I think that's crazy. I think notifying the church of my resignation would be completely unnecessary and it's exactly what they want.

- Authenticity? I call the shots. I don't need to loop the church in on my decisions.
- Not having to worry about them contacting me? They're welcome to contact me all they want.
- Not having to worry about them trying to reactivate me? Again, they're more than welcome to try.
- The church is numbers driving, so why bolster their numbers by leaving my name on? You're kidding, right? Do you honestly think the church stops counting people after they submit letters of resignation? That's absurd! Can you back that up with anything?

Based on my observations, one reason to stay on the rolls is when you have low income and know how to play the bishop for resources.

Either resign or don't.

BUT don't ask anyone about your name.

If you want to be officially out of the morg, say, "I resign as of today."

I never thought I would resign, because it just didn't matter. But now that they're going after my daughter my feelings have changed. I want to be able to say clearly and without hesitation, no I am not a Mormon.

However, when to resign is another question. Like many others have stated, there are family issues involved. So I will wait until I feel the time is right.

I think that's how I feel too. I mean, I get what others are saying - about 'I decide whether or not I'm a member', etc, but if someone asks me if I'm a member, I feel like I can only truthfully say 'no' if I'm formally resigned.
Also, I think about, what if my husband and I both died with our names still on the rolls....With our daughter still so young, would our parents in law try to use that argument on her when she's older to say 'see, your parents left their names on the rolls. They still believed, they just weren't active' or something to that effect.

I think it's kind of a personal choice whether or not you resign. I can see why someone wouldn't. Think of it this way: you a asking the Morgue permission to leave. You don't need their permission, and you never did.

Yes, it is a personal decision.

I was BIC and left the second my parents let me make that decision (early teens). I never chose to be Mormon so why should I have to formally resign from an organization that I never signed up for. In a way, the act of resigning would be an admission that I currently recognize them as a presence or as an authority in my life.

For those who wish to resign but do not wish to seek their permission or be subject to their rules, why not simply state:-

I (name etc.) hereby formally resign my membership in the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints with immediate effect. I fully understand the consequences of this action.

I require no acknowledgement from you and I deny you the right to make any further contact with me. If you do contact me, for whatever reason, I will consider it an invasion of my personal privacy and will consider legal action against you.

By law, this formal notice of my resignation is effective immediately on receipt by you. If I am sending an email, that will be within seconds. If I am sending it by registered post, it will be on receipt at your office.

...thus playing their games.

No I am not playing their games. I am merely informing them that I have left and warning them if they try their games by contacting me, there will be legal repercussions.

I only wrote this as a suggestion for anyone who wishes to resign. My personal choice is not to play any of their games/rules. My withdrawal from activity and paying tithing is my "resignation" on my own terms.

I would say that is playing their game. It is playing their game a hell of a lot more than just not resigning. requiring resigning being part of their game to begin with.



Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 08/19/2013 09:47PM by MJ.

You are absolutely right about this, you do not have to get permission to stop association and membership.

Do listen though, that for many it turns out to be a more validating experience than they thought.

I think people should consider the process, but not feel obligated to ultimately resign, but do consider the process. It can be done without relinquishing your power.

For many it will be a chance to tell a Mormon self–important authority, I'm done with you, don't contact me again. The passive aggressive language of Mormons behind the scenes is well if they really wanted out of the Church they would resign so we are just reaching out to our lost sheep.

Resignation--I know how to find you, forget how to find me. I don't want to be associated with you any longer.



Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 08/19/2013 08:55PM by gentlestrength.

Its nice to see others that see it the same as I do, even though I totally recommend that people do what they want to in these instances, that those who definitely feel inclined to resign should do so for their satisfaction.


I baptized people into MORmONISM. LDS INC Never instructed us to make sure to serve formal notice to their local diocese or congregation that the new MORmON convert had left their original church by joining MORmONISM. In my opinion its because LDS Inc. just did care enough about all those other, hopelessly apostate churches enough to be bothered with such a thing, and if they did care it was LDS Inc's way of showing contempt. So why give LDS Inc any more respect or any better treatment than that?

"I don't understand why some people..."

the best part about not being a Mormon, for me, is that I don't have to worry about people that choose to do things differently than me - I don't have to try and sell them on my way of doing things or try to get them to play my kinds of numbers games, because, well, I got my fill of acting like that as a Mormon

Absolutely.
And then, to be subtly accused of being unauthentic....

I didn't resign according to the church's rules because I felt that there was no reason to follow their rules. I verbally resigned. I have since discovered that even if you resign the supposed "right way" , that the chuch does not remove your name anyway. So why bother ?

I've seen a few comments to this effect - how do people know this? Is there proof?

No business would delete the records of transactions done. It could have serious legal ramifications.

Not only legal ramifications, but even data management ramifications.

It's a standard best practice to not delete data in a database, but instead to simply mark it deleted and then skip over it when doing searches and reports. Databases can have so many links between different bits of data that deleting something can create holes and broken links.

dogeatdog Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
First off, let's get authinic, TSCC does not remove your name from the records, the record is still kept, only flagged as inactive or something of the sort.

> -authenticity

Nothing unauthentic about not being bothered to do something one does not care about.

> -not having to worry about them contacting you

If one is not "worried" about being contacted, why make the effort to resign?

> -not having to worry about them trying to
> reactivate you

If one is not "worried" about being reactivated, why make the effort to resign?

> -the church is numbers driven, so why bolster
> their numbers by leaving your name on?

The numbers TSCC gives out are probably fraudulent anyway and resigning probably will not make the numbers honest. Then again, if one does not care what the LDS church gives out as numbers, why should they bother?

I have a cousin that was baptized when she was 18. She never went back after 40 years. She has never been bothered or contacted, she doesn't give a squat about the LDS church or the numbers they give out.

So, why should my cousin let the LDS church intrude enough into her life as to go through the resignation process?

This has more bearing on a person/family depending on where they live. I live in Utah and though I want to move away I am stuck here for at least eighteen more months. My daughter will be eight soon and the primary and possibly missionaries will be out in full force to try and befriend her to sway us to allow her baptism. If I were to resign and take them off record as well, then more than half that pressure would stop. I like the idea of just completely ignoring their rules but in Utah it's unignorable!

I am secretly (Not so secretly anymore) leaving my name on the rolls for awhile longer so that as my friends and acquaintances from my youth return from their missions, they will track me down and I have the opportunity to offer them an explanation, and maybe even some sense and reason. I don't expect it to have much of an impact. At best I can hope to give them a thing or two to stack onto their shelf.

I have had a few completely cut ties with me, and one who tried very adamantly to reactivate me, to the point of harassment, so I cut ties with him. I am also secretly hoping that the word gets around so that I actually get excommunicated, leaving almost ALL of the procedural and clerical responsibilities entirely on the church. And of course, I kinda want to experience the infamous 'Court of Love'for myself!

All you have to do is send a one paragraph letter/email resigning. Everything else from that point on is their problem , not yours. They send out the Please Come Back letter. They roust out their bishop, and give I'm paperwork to fill out. He sends it to the SP, who signs off on the paperwork. Then the COB sends you the final letter.

All the hoops are hoops they are jumping through, not you.



Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 08/20/2013 12:57AM by Brother Of Jerry.

then resigning your membership may cause them to disown you -- write you out of their will.

If you are simply inactive, but are still officially a member, then your TBM parents are more likely to be generous and leave you an inheritance. I speak from experience.

Mormons conflate church membership with faith. This hasn't been the case in my experience as a member of several mainstream Protestant churches. I can still be a believing Christian without formal membership or regular attendance in any particular church.

After leaving one particular church to attend another that we felt better met our needs, I did receive a call from the pastor who called because he hadn't seen us in several months and wanted to make sure we were okay. When I explained our decision, he wished us well and asked me to call him if we every needed anything. I still got the monthly newsletter for about a year but eventually that stopped coming. No harassment, no accusation that I was no longer Christian, no love bombing, etc.

I don't regularly attend church anymore but am received warmly when I do come. Participation is voluntary and not coerced.

This is a good point you've touched on. I feel like I'll be 'sending a message' to TBM family members and friends by resigning- that I have no faith in TSCC.



Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 08/20/2013 10:05PM by dogeatdog.

Also, there's a difference between submitting a letter of resignation vs. submitting a letter of resignation AND a request to have your name removed from their records. A big difference..

Why not?

Because my mind and spiritual life are elsewhere. I don't care about TSCC or their records. I was baptized into a different religion when I was a small child, and their records are meaningless to me, too. Resigning means I think there's some validity or relevance there. There isn't.

Because I still have a lot of Mormon relatives, some in my immediate family.

Because my ex's new wife (who is a b!&*h on wheels) gets to spend her life thinking about sharing him with me in the CK. That scenario will bother her much more than it will bother me.

I left 35+ years ago, back when there was no resignation, and I returned to the religion of my youth. I have never been contacted, although they must know where I am because I get the BYU alumni magazine.

I do not feel they have any power over me with their stupid fake authority and rules. Resigning now would feel stupid to me since I am long gone.

I sure like this board. I'd have left even sooner if I'd have had it back then. Keep up the good work and thanks everyone.

But resigning isn't playing by TSCC rules, it's following rules put into place by law to stop things like harassment from the cult minions or excommunication and reputation slighting over the pulpit. Yes, they don't always comply, but it certainly establishes a nice paper trail for YOU should ward or family members get extra stalky and overconcerned with your salvation.

I mean great, nobody in this thread had an excess of morg contact or narcissists playing the church game coming after you destroying your character, that's good! I hope the nuts and crazies DON'T ever bother you, but some of us had an assfull of it and are glad for any token provided by law to get them to stop.

Now meeting with the bishop, and allowing talks with patriarchs and high priests with mumbo jumbo apologetics, humoring their attempts to change your mind... THAT'S playing their game.