I'm signing my name , liking, whatever to it! SO FREAKING ANGRY RIGHT NOW. Bishop just questioned my daughter tonight about her alleged sexual sins because some boy "confessed" to his bishop. Never mind that this boy has Psychological problems, or the fact that he is on an anti-psychotic or the fact that my daughter and he got into a big fight because he wanted to be more than friends and she told him no. So he quits speaking to her and a week later she's being questioned about her sexual sins by a grown man behind closed doors and told he won't tell her parents or friends. She is 14!! She is sooooo NOT one of those teens that is having sex at 14. She told me she didn't feel comfortable with the meeting and is very upset that he would even think she would be doing anything. She came out in tears. I told her I would take care of it. I just sent an email to both bish and S.pres. They will NOT meet with my children again without one of us present and that I thought it was ridiculous that they fell for 14 year old vindictiveness and gossip. Maybe writing while I'm angry was not a good idea, but I want them to understand how upset I am and how upset they have made my daughter.

Never mind...I found it! Thanks

Here you go, and thank you for the support!
https://www.facebook.com/pages/No-More-End-Mormons-Sexually-Invasive-Interviews-of-Children/503622079732706?fref=ts

I'm sorry that this happened and for the difficult time your daughter must be going through. Even going beyond the issue of invasive interviews with kids, this says a lot about the different in male/female treatment in tscc. You really did the right thing, refusing to let the church leaders meet with her alone. Good for you, standing up for her and saying NO!

ETA: Darn, a couple minutes too late. Still, all the best to you and your daughter. I hope there will be no more drama regarding this other boy.



Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 08/21/2013 10:25PM by msp.

I'd say that when you're angry it's the perfect time to confront the Bishop. It's time for action.

and I will say it again. The only way it is going to change is if PARENTS change it.

It's not writing angry that i think is the problem. It's that you sent an e-mail to the abuser instead of reporting this to the police. The police and CPS need to investigate this. Bishop and the kid who is stalking your daughter need to have restraining order against them to keep them, both of them, away from your daughter.

I just don't get how a parent would ever let their child be in the same room with someone who abused them, unless it was to testify against them at trial

When I was 12 1/2, I was pulled into the bishop's office for telling a crass, very mildly sexual joke during a Mutual activity night. I was tattled on by the Beehive advisor, & was pulled into a meeting without my parents' knowledge. The bishop shamed me so horribly, & even used knowledge of my past sexual abuse, saying something to effect that because I was sexually abused, I should know better that anything sexual is sinful & evil. He made me cry so hard, & when my mom picked me up later, she acted like nothing was wrong, despite the fact that I was still crying.

Good for you for taking the initiative; these invasive interviews--especially of impressionable and vulnerable children--are a disgrace!

Definitely inappropriate, but it blows me away that people submit to these interviews at all...

I was personally led to believe that any sort of interview also happened in other churches, & that worthiness interviews were akin to confession. I was lied to, & I bought the lie.

You were definitely lied to. Most mainstream Protestant denominations don't have official confession. People confess their sins to God directly. Even in the Catholic Church, which has confession, it is voluntary, not mandatory.

In the Catholic Church, going to confession once a year is an obligation. However, you don't have to go to your parish priest. You can go anywhere. If you don't go to confession once a year, the priests won't come after you. It is completely voluntary. The priests are also sworn to secrecy and take that vow very seriously. It is sinful for them to violate that vow. Also, you are only supposed to confess "mortal" sins. Venial sins are between you and God.

So I called the police this morning just to see what my options were if the bishop tries to "interview" my child again after I have explicitly told him not in writing. The officers were very concerned and sent on officer to the house. But he told me there was nothing legally i could do unless he exposes himself or touches one of my children. He said that it doesn't sound right at all and recommended we find another church. (obviously) He also recommended we got to the church "higher ups". I told him I had already gone one level up. We'll see how this plays out. But I informed the bishop again today that it is not up for discussion, either we are present or the interviews do NOT happen.