And today after a lifetime membership (in my 40s now), I'm fully inactive.

Sometimes I almost wish it were true, it can be a great life, I loved my time at BYU in the 80s.

But the Church isn't what it claims to be......

I could go on and on, but this is my first post.

We would love to hear more about your journey. I, too, am a former HP Group leader, although not nearly as recent as you.

Welcome "regularguy". I think your background is more typical than not of those leaving the fraud that is COJCOLDS, mine included. Enjoy your stay...I certainly have.

I was at BYU in the 80's. I had an amazing time there... wish I had received an "amazing" education.

I hope that very soon you're able to fully enjoy your newfound freedom from the real and imaginary Patriarchal Dictators.

sonoma Wrote:
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> I was at BYU in the 80's. I had an amazing time
> there...

I suppose if I had gone to BYU in the 80's... Then there wouldn't be all those pictures out there of me with a mullet!

Welcome, and looking forward to hearing more of your story.



Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 01/30/2011 11:08PM by DNA.

Welcome

It will take time to get used to your new life. Come here often,it has helped me tremendously. Some people are able to "shake" the church easily, others have a more difficult time. My husband said good bye and never looked back. I, on the other hand, am having a more difficult time, and don't really know why. Be thankful to have discovered the truth (or the lie) and acted upon it, rather than so many who doubt, or even KNOW the church is not true and continue to live the masquerade. I wish you the best!

Hi Regularguy. Your name says a lot about the journey out of Mormonism. I left at age 50.

I'm female, so didn't hold the all-important Priesthood. But all Mormons are told that we are the Elite of the Earth. It takes some time to get used to the idea of just being a normal, every day person.

There was a brief moment for me where I almost felt like, "But I'm not special anymore. I'm just a regular person." You do get to the point where you think, "Thank goodness. I'm just a regular person." But it does take time to adjust to that new reality.

I loved it when the bubble popped, and that "aura" of feeling as if I knew something cosmic that others did not dissolved for good. I loved taking off the "bubble" garments, the false insulation from evil and harm, the robes of delusion.

I escaped the bubble at 18, but sealed myself back up in it from the age of 28-42, cocooned in it while I wished, really, to isolate part of myself from myself.

The feeling of living in reality amazes me still. Each day comes as a gift. As I type, the neighbor is rolling out of the driveway, jerking the car, dressed in Sunday best, honking emphatically at children who slowly approach the car. They're off to the 1:00 church. The suppressed fury of their departure pierces the tranquility of the afternoon, then dissolves into silence.

Ishmael Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> As I type, the neighbor
> is rolling out of the driveway, jerking the car,
> dressed in Sunday best, honking emphatically at
> children who slowly approach the car. They're off
> to the 1:00 church. The suppressed fury of their
> departure pierces the tranquility of the
> afternoon, then dissolves into silence.

Wow, eloquently described, so reminiscent! This is the archetype of the innocent victim in the cult.

Regular Guy, please tell us more about your journey out of the church! It is so helpful to hear individual's stories...

What I really want to know is about wife and family, how did they take it, are they still active? Did your wife leave with you?

Greetings! Also a BYU grad from the 80s, also a former PH leader, and ALSO a hopeless romantic alternating between inexplicable sadness and anger at the tragic legacy of unnecessary destruction caused by TSCC in my extended family (and through all generation of time and throughout all eternity, lol), and a silly yearning for the innocent time of imaginary truth, imaginary cosmic reality and imaginary community.

It's all bullshit. Generations have hung on the imaginary gross of honorable sacrifice and put themselves through a lifetime of unnecessary anxiety and guilt for nothing. I am relieved every day to be through with it.

Nevertheless, I have said before that it is like an amputation -- you have to have it off to save your life, but in many ways you'd just as well keep it.

Leaving is a process and a journey -- and now for you it is inevitable, once you know the facts you thankfully cannot go back.

Welcome and hope you enjoy the feeling of being just a regular human being. More than that I hope you enjoy interacting openly with all the regular (not special) people of the world.

Before I came onto RFM, I thought that since the Mormon church is male-dominated, that men would naturally be happier in that society than women--but I was wrong. It has been so interesting to get the men's perspective on Mormonism.

Regardless of how high a person is able to climb on the ladder-day-saint ladder, regardless of whether or not a person enjoys the feeling of belonging to a closed, elitist society--the doctrine is still false.

You said you "almost wish it were true." For me, that indicates that, as a man with high status, Mormonism was easier on you than it was on me, for example. I'm a single divorced working mother, and when I found out Mormonism is a hoax, I and my children were very relieved and happy to escape.

Being single, I didn't have a spouse to deal with. I hope your wife and children are supportive of you. It was important to me to get my children out of the cult as well.

LOL, never thought I had "high status", never was really into that.

I guess I should post some of my "exit" story, maybe a new thread? Not sure of the protocal here.

Call it "My Exit Story" or "My Story."

Amazing what a year can bring. It's a real journey that goes on and on. I've been hanging out here for a solid 10 years now and am still learning.

Welcome! Tell us what you think. I was a HPGL once, too. What a nightmare! We also have former bishops and such here on the board.

Most of us can say: one year ago I was _________ (fill in the blank) in the LDS Church.

I was at BYU in the 80s - graduated and everything. I liked BYU but could never get used to the redneck attitudes of some of the Utah/Idaho Mormons even then. I was in the Primary presidency when I found out what the church really was and how many lies there were. It's really helped to have people on this board to validate what I'm going through and answer any questions about history or doctrine. I've learned so much here. Good luck with your journey out of the church.

At least, the Bishop told me he had submitted my name to the Stake Pres, who was going to be calling me.

At that point, I knew that I would have to talk to the Bishop about my testimony. Three months earlier I had discovered some truths about the church and had been seriously studying ever since, and was in the depths of despair. So we had a very long tearful talk, and he had to call someone else.

Wow- one would think that with the mantle of discernment, he would have been impressed, not to call me as HPGL, but to call me and ask me if there was anything the matter.

Hard to believe God would have remained silent on such an important decision process, much less the situation regarding the spiritual welfare of one of his members...

But that's onme thing about a Bishop- you can sit next to one in the depth of agony and unless you or someone else tells him, he'll never know.

sorry- sometimes I forget my manners...

Welcome RegularGuy. Definitly share your story. I just jumped in about 10 months ago and it's not the way to do it.

One year ago I lied my way to a Temple Rec,then had to sit in the sealing room while my dd and SIL were married. I was heart sick for them and wanted to stand up and share things with them. Of course I didn't,and I am all the way out now.

I left at age 70, after 52 years in the church. I taught the High Priests for years. Prop 8 did it for me. I thought about my own
dear gay relatives (two brothers, one son), and decided they had more kindness and better human ethics than the LDS church. I am very happy in my choice of family first, man-made religion 2nd.



Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 01/30/2011 10:15PM by george.

Welcome Regular Guy! It's amazing how much we all have in common and how open we can all be about things now that no one controls what we say any more.

I was a BYU student about the same time you were there. DH and I (along with the rest of our family) left the church for good just after he was called but declined a calling in the Bishopric a couple of years ago. It's so nice to be out of the church and more or less a normal person for the first time in my life! It seems like I'm seeing more and more people leaving the TSCC in their 40s+.

Again welcome! (I'm mostly a lurker here).