Wasn't going to join an exmo forum but just be content to read postings when I felt I needed a boost on my journey to deprogram myself after 40 years of believing. After my resignation, an incident by the church, meant solely to intimidate me, has propelled me to speak up.
I was indoctrinated with the cult script circa 1970 and I internalized it well. The church of forbidden truths owned me womb and all. Although on the books I was considered more inactive than active (due primarily to my social phobia) over the next 40 years they would maintain their grip on my heart and mind. I had their 4 cornerstone teachings down pat..fear, shame, guilt and what I will call their Simon Sez Syndrome of permission. Didnt realize until I got out how much I felt infantilized by the gen. AUTHORITIES indoctrination. I gave them 99% of my personal power in exchange for my third class membership in their elite "only true church on earth" and I was only 17. I sat still and allowed them to do a number on my head with their sugar coated abuse because I wanted to believe them for a chance at their monopoly in heaven..succor the dumb sucker.
I had my "oh crap" moment in the summer of 2010 and I resigned in the spring of 2011 although theyve yet to confirm my resignation with an official letter so guess I have to write another one..now where is my mo# they assigned. Oh how Simon Sez love their hoops.
Of course there is a lifetime in between the lines but not up to anything but condensed version for now.
I appreciate this forum as another step in my deprogramming from Joseph's massive mess of a paradigm of bs. Oh how I'm holding back;)