I stopped attending when I was about 14. I hated everything about church immensely. I hated fasting. I now know that I am hypoglycemic and should not fast at all, and especially should not have been forced to as a child.

For thirty plus years my name remains on their list of members, and I keep refusing home visits and the like, politely and respectfully. A few years back, I asked to be removed from their member list. I thought this would be a simple thing. Instead, I received a letter from the local bishop, and in that letter contained a form that I was supposed to fill out stating that i was aware that...."blah blah blah...I know the church doctrine is true", and that I willingly want to remove myself from it. I refused to agree that their doctrine is true, therefore I still remain a member. I wadded the letter up in a rage, then later used it as kindling, so i can't quote the exact wording.
My family are still members and as an adult, I can see how this rift has caused severe family dysfunction, because, as most of you know, family comes first, until they stop attending church. My child was indoctrinated against my wishes by my family and it causes me endless, crushing grief. I can only hope that someday she will wake up and see the lies.
Today, as I am working on self growth and awareness, I am revisiting my childhood, trying to let go of impediments to self love and acceptance. By a fluke (or not!) I arrived here. What is this telling me? What is the next, logical thought process? The next thing that came to mind was the fact that my father is the one who converted my mother, and later, my stepmother to mormonism. All subsequent offspring were indoctrinated.

Why was he attracted to this religion? He was a womanizer, had at least 5 wives, 9 children (that we know of), and was a criminal and a pedophile. I searched the archives here for "pedophilia" and lo and behold, there is Joseph Smith. A fraud, con man and pedophile. I guess this explains much. I guess I don't need magic eyeglasses to see the truth. Angry, but not necessarily surprised.
Thank you all for being here in this time of my trying to make sense of nonsense. I view this religion as one of the many ways I endured child abuse.
Love and light to you all.