Very interesting!! When I served in South Korea years ago, it was so f%&$# hard. It was the hardest thing I had ever done. The language (I was an early missionary and they hadn't figured out how to best train the missionaries in the difficult language). I enjoyed the people, the culture, and the experience. For the first time, I started to realize this was a cult (or something like it). It w
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Thanks bradley. I relate to your post.
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Thanks very much Breeze. I appreciate the encouragement and your wise words.
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I do not post on here very often. But, as lifetime member/leader in the Mormon Church, I can say it is never too late. I was a Bishop, on the High Council three times, EQP, and so forth. After finding out the "truth" about this church, I struggled for a number of years to muster up the courage to do what I needed to do. I was trapped (it felt like) and was in shock. I had doubts
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Red wine (cabernet).
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Excellent post by "another simi valley sunday" My experience (both as an leader/insider and apostate) generally supports each point. Of course, there are exceptions on the shunning. But, the basic point of the post--members being treated as objects is true--in my opinion.
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I grew up in Utah. I would rather go to hell than live in Utah. Lived there, didn't live there, moving back to Utah, Utah is great, Utah sucks, the church sucks but Utah is great, Utah and the church sucks, and on and on and on. I get it but I visit Utah every year (because of family). If the church sucks and the church controls Utah, I would rather live somewhere else. Given your comments, I
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Quitting is the best thing. I realize the pain and the challenges (I have gone through them). But, it is the right thing. The wasted time, money, and worry (about going to hell) is sad. Leaving will make you free. But, it takes time (for some) to get there (I am an example). This church is not what it claims to be.
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Divorce, one child is pissed (he is TBM), others seem to understand. Very tough!!! But, to be honest, if someone loves the church more than they love me, fuck them. The church demands a woman to be married to the church and it breaks up marriages.
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So, I have now gone 8 years not going to church, not attending the temple, not wearing my garments, not attending leadership meetings, not listening to General Conference, not reading the BOM, not obeying the WOW (I drink coffee and wine), and not paying much attention to the bull shit. Well, it is has been hard after 30 years of total obedience, mind control techniques, many hours a week in doin
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I gave hundreds of priesthood blessings as a Bishop, EQP, missionary, and father. I actually received hardly no blessings from others. I always had issues with blessings. I cannot comment on the outcomes as much as the inspiration I felt. I didn't feel inspiration--I just went through the words and the proper things you would say in a Mormon blessing. But, most of the time (or all of the time),
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Characteristics Associated with Cultic Groups - Revised Janja Lalich, Ph.D. & Michael D. Langone, Ph.D. Concerted efforts at influence and control lie at the core of cultic groups, programs, and relationships. Many members, former members, and supporters of cults are not fully aware of the extent to which members may have been manipulated, exploited, even abused. The following list
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That makes sense. However, I have never had an MBA Bishop before. I think it might depend on the area you live and the level of education in that area. The west might be different than the south and more rural areas. But, I am sure it varies a great deal. By the way, I have an MBA and Ph.D. I always tried to be kind, loving, and personable to each member. I tried to be helpful but realized I
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I see this question raised from time to time. I like to answer this as a former leader (Bishop, Counselor, etc.). Bottom line, a Bishop is as good as his own wisdom and people skills. I saw good and bad leaders. But, I think those same good leaders would be good in other places (business, government, and so forth). One of the things that started to cause me to have doubts was this question a
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Socially much more liberal. Fiscally, about the same--moderately conservative.
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Thank you!! Your posts are very helpful to me. Just wanted to say that.
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Thanks!! Yes, I was approached about issues where I had absolutely no training or professional understanding. Some members think Bishops know everything or have a pipeline to God. Others question the things you mention. Some of the intimate worthiness questions were tough and I felt very uncomfortable. This board helps me a great deal to be more open and honest with my feelings, experience
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I am aware of many that have left the church or have distanced themselves from the church. I am one of them. I have been talking with a number of them that were in the same ward as me when I served as Bishop. To me, this is actually pretty amazing. I am thinking where we all were then and now. Maybe some of them were already ready to exit at that time. It was when I served as Bishop that I sta
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I wore garments for years-one piece and two piece. I never liked them but when you are TBM extreme, you don't think about it too much. But, as you realize this is a cult, garments are one of the things that bothered me the most. The day I stopped wearing garments was truly a very enjoyable day. I think the wearing of garments (24 hours per day) is another strong control mechanism by the church.
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I do find it interesting that others ask if I still have my garments and if they could borrow one. About 10 people I know had a party where they all wore garments (on the outside of their clothes).
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I think my other favorites are: my glass of red wine each day and my Sunday brunches with others. Both of these things have enhanced my life.
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NO GARMENTS. It means, -A feeling of freedom -Sleeping in the nude or close to it -Shorts in the summer -No garment line -Wearing whatever undergarment I wish and enjoying it The best feeling ever. Freedom!!!
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I had a Punk'n this afternoon here on the west coast. Loved it!! Any other pumpkin flavored beers you can recommend. It 'tis the season.
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Do you believe that prayer is a good thing or a fairy tale kind of thing? Did you used to believe in prayer? Is it possible there is one God out there that answers (in some way) prayers for all people (no matter what their religion)? Or is that crazy? Over many years, I have had mixed experiences but usually it seems worthless to me. Does prayer make a difference in your life in anyway? I know
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Love it!! Describes the church perfectly
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I have actually had many glasses of each. I prefer California wine.
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I was visiting a friend in California who has a sizable wine cellar (a few hundred bottles of wine). The couple took strong positions on wine--one says French Wine is the best and the other said California is the best. It was interesting as I had both. But, I realize there are different opinions on this. Any strong opinions on which is the best?
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I am close to the end of an ugly divorce (almost fairy tale world of the Mormon Church--facts do not matter--make up things--people are going to hell that leave--I am one of one of them). I am disgusted, sometimes depressed, confused, and 100% know that I have been screwed by the cult. I have moved forward but finally am trying to put everything behind me. It is a little tougher than it seems whe
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Sitting out by my pool and smoking a cigar and enjoying some red wine. It is peaceful, quiet, and I am happy. Life is so much better without the cult in my life. If I have learned anything in my life, it is to be yourself. That is what I am trying to do.
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For decades, I felt uncomfortable going to socials when alcohol was served. Actually, I wasn't invited most of the time. Tonight, I went to a party where we drank and did other things. People (for the past 10 years) have seen me change. A few people have said how nice this is that I am NORMAL. All I know is that MORMON DOESN'T EQUAL NORMAL. It is nice to be happy and I wasn't happy for ma
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