As a Middle Eastern guy and former investigator (I was never baptized) in an all-white LDS ward,
the attitude of the church towards interracial relationships always interested me.
From what I could tell the church seemed to feed its young members covert racial purity doctrine.

I experienced an example of what I felt was hidden racist teachings during the Eternal Marriage class.
The teacher was telling the story of a female missionary from the U.S. who after returning from her mission,
married a guy from another culture (without specifying what he meant by "another culture").
He said the guy ended up lying to her and cheating on her. The teacher was speaking directly to the girls
in the class and warning them to be careful about cultural differences.

Notice the subtle message he was sending the girls. He was implying that if they marry a guy from another culture,
they will be lied to and cheated on; as if things like that do not happen all the time in relationships between
people of the same ethnic and cultural background. Consider why he was not warning the guys to be careful
about cultural differences when choosing a girlfriend or wife. Because it is my impression Mormons do not
mind when white men marry non-white women, since it seems they secretly consider light-skinned people
superior to dark-skinned people. It is only the combination of a white woman and a "colored" man they do not like.

When questioning Mormons why they and their church seem opposed to interracial relationships and marriage,
they strongly denied any such opposition and were happy to give me examples:

"Our stake president is married to an Asian woman!"
"Our bishop's wife is Hispanic!"
"My cousin is dating a black girl!"

They just forget all those examples involve white men dating or married to non-white women. It seems as far as
the other way around goes, white women dating or marrying non-white men, is where the LDS church draws the line.

At the local LDS ward I was an investigator at for six years, I saw several examples of white guys dating non-white girls
among the Young Single Adults, but never once saw any example of the opposite, white girls dating non-white guys,
and it made me wonder why interracial relationships are so rare among Mormons, and even when you find them,
they always involve white men dating or marrying interracially.

Maybe the secret racial purity indoctrination the church feeds the young women from an early age got to their head, and the
young white women believe it is their duty to keep their race "white and delightsome" by exclusively dating and marrying
tall, blonde-haired, blue-eyed white males, whereas the church being a male-dominated church, gives its men the freedom to
marry interracially if they choose.

After all, the LDS church is essentially a white church.
It is all about being white and right.



Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 10/06/2013 10:45AM by mogambo.

I don't know that it's common, but I know of a black stake president married to a white woman. I think the church (outside of Utah) is getting better at accepting interracial relationships.

That said, I do think that there is some residual tendency to shy away from that, because the church used to teach that races shouldn't mix. Especially from the older members.

Wow - hadn't considered it but you are right. I can think of three interracial couples in my ward, but all three are white guy married to non-white girl. One is white guy - hispanic girl, another is white guy - japanese girl, and the third is white guy - west indian girl.

Just drives one more nail in the coffin of my belief in mormonism.

My departed wife was "lamanite".
How she was treated changed immensely for the better when members realised she was not hispanic but "lamanite"
It was interesting to then see how many members were part lamanite and started to brag to one another about it.
As far as I know it is also the only race Brigham Young specifically endorsed if not commanded white males to marry.

On the flip side. I found it interesting that Moses married an Ethiopian (black) woman and God cursed those that spoke against it. Number chapter 12.

I'm a child of the 70's-90's in Mormonism when a barely-covered layer of racist "doctrine" spanned my experience.

My two younger cousins who converted to Mormonism fairly recently are half white but not European at all as far as their appearance. One converted because she is engaged to a white Mormon guy. The other one is also dating a white Mormon. I wondered at first if they would experience racism from other Mormons for that reason, but according to the OP, it sounds like white guy/non-white girl is generally not a problem. I wonder what would happen if one of their brothers also converted and started dating a white Mormon girl, though.

Since the LDS church seems preoccupied right now with falling membership, maybe going forward "interracial" relationships won't be such a big deal (?). Who cares what color people are if they're having kids/new members and tithing?

The young women president in my ward is married to a black guy. But I also don't live in Utah or Idaho, the Mormons where I live are pretty tolerant (comparatively).

I've noticed that too with Mormons and racist mentalities in general. It seems to be more acceptable for a white man to marry a woman of another race, but it crosses the line when a white girl does the same.

I think this also stems from a sexist mentality too. It seems to be more acceptable for a man to have sowed his wild oats than it is for a "pure" woman to "lose" her virginity.

There are number of Japanese/Caucasian married couples in S. Alberta...have been for years....but I do remember when one of the first ones were first married...there was some cackling by some old "hens" (my mother, who was raised Presbyterian among them) about it. Never could figure out why.

Ron Burr

"Shall I tell you the law of God in regard to the African race? If the white man who belongs to the chosen seed mixes his blood with the seed of Cain, the penalty, under the law of God, is death on the spot. This will always be so."

Remarks by President Brigham Young, made in the Tabernacle, Great Salt Lake City, March 8, 1863, reported by G. D. Watt on pp110 of volume 10

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gzgzdgKiGg4

" ... [W]e recommend that people marry those who are of the same racial background generally ...."

https://www.lds.org/manual/eternal-marriage-student-manual/marriage-for-eternity?lang=eng


I recently made another post with some additional analysis of this quote:

http://exmormon.org/phorum/read.php?2,1025051,1025051#msg-1025051

My niece married a man of Tongan descent (great guy, btw). I obviously couldn't go to their temple wedding. At the reception his dad spoke along the lines of how wonderful it was to have a white girl marry a Tongan to bring about the lighter skin. That may not have been the exact term he used but the words he said were very clear. He believed she was helping the Tongans to become lighter through her offspring and that more young women would do the same. Hes was dead serious. At first I thought he must be joking as I have never heard such a thing before, but he wasn't. Has anyone else heard this? There were a lot of people there and the only jaws I saw drop were my nevermo husband's and mine.

"Mormon author George D. Smith notes that Joseph Smith was given a revelation which foretold of a day when intermarriage with the Lamanites would produce a white and delightsome posterity. George Smith wrote:

"'This unpublished 17 July 1831 revelation was described three decades later in an 1861 letter from W.W. Phelps to Brigham Young quoting Joseph Smith: "It is my will, that in time, ye [white, Mormon men] should take unto you wives of the Lamanites and Nephites, that their posterity, may become white, delightsome and just." In the 8 December 1831 Ohio Star, Ezra Booth wrote of a revelation directing Mormon elders to marry with the "natives"' (Sunstone, November 1993, footnote #5, pg. 52)."

http://www.mrm.org/white-and-delightsome

Great work Fetal Diety. That's probably essentially what he said.

They said the lamanites have become white and delightsome by mixing with the spanish.

Three of us from our single ward here in Utah married interracially.

I married a Mexican American, my one roomie a Mexican, and the other a Chinese man.

But, all three of us were from MI.......

Also, one of the girls in our ward back home married a black guy, though she doesn't go to church.

So, it seems that where you are raised has something to do with it, and this was 26 years ago.

Many men in my family have married someone of a different nationality, ethnic background, race, & also women of multi-racial backgrounds. But if a woman in my family were to even marry a blonde-blue eyed white Brazilian or Puerto Rican (just some examples) they would be disowned.

Before I left on my mission my mom said "Cornelius, remember, Venezuelan girls are for Venezuelan boys". I think she would have freaked if I had brought one home.

And Brigham Young said: The penalty for mixing the seed of white men with the seed of Cain (as they considered Blacks to be) was and will forever be "death on the spot."

I was asked what my family thought about having a black uncle (who is a brain surgeon--no lie). This TBM that asked me this has an Asian sister-in-law who is on her 7th kid.

He wanted to know my family's reaction to my aunt marrying a black neurosurgeon, but it was okay for his brother to marry an Asian who is only known for being fertile.

Older white members of other religions are just as racist as the older white members of the Mormons. I think you're just generalizing

Well, now, who's "just generalizing"? I could swear that it is you, Gloverboy6. What you say may be true in some parts of the country --- I once lived in a city where many of the older white people whom I knew were (to me) amazingly racist.

But it certainly is not true where I live now. Quite the opposite, and I routinely mix with folks from a very wide range of churches.

So maybe it would be good, if you disapprove of generalizations, to avoid them yourself.

Up until just about two years ago, the LDS church Aaronic priesthood manual specifically taught young men to avoid interracial marriages.

The LDS church should not get a free pass just because other churches had racists members too. The Book of Mormon specifically says that the curse on American Indians will pass on to the descendants if an un-cursed person marries a "lamanite". No other scripture in the world is that detailed about America's indigenous peoples and it is taught that the Book of Mormon is applicable to living "lamanites" in current times.

Most LDS members today are not racist like some members of the older generation, but the real problem is found in the canonized scriptures of the LDS church. If Mormonism is what it claims to be, the only true church on earth restored through Joseph Smith, a supposed prophet, then they have more explaining to do about the generational curse on the Lamanites than they have provided in their racism essay.

Growing up in the Las Vegas 2nd Ward I was always very Mexican looking; I had the dark skin, sullen, sultry expression, huaraches, sombrero, pet burro named Einstein, complete with fuzzy dice looped around his neck... Yeah, I was the total package. All the MiaMaids and Laurels I dated were White and delightsome. Only two TBM moms played the sinful-Lamanite-who-keeps-getting-darker-in-the-summer card.

One mom was from mormon royalty (even though she was pregnant when she got married) and the other was the Stake patriarch's wife.

The regular folk, no problems.

After my mission, at the Y, no problems. I only dated three other women before I met my BYU bride, and I suppose that in the dark they couldn't tell the difference, so it was all good.

Only one wackadoodle; we went out twice, she initiated the dry humping, and then made us pray for forgiveness afterwards. Only time something like that ever happened. I suspect that it was because she was from Canada...

In my generation and background, us white girls married interacally.

I am from Michigan but ended up in Uth with friends. I married a latino, my bff married a latino from Mexico, my other friend married a Chinese man, my other friend married a black man. We are all fom the same ward/stake in Michigan.

But we, except for the one, met here in Utah. my friend who married the black man met him in Japan, even though he was from Compton.

I would never had imagined it would wok out like that, but it did.

oops, missed my old post, sorry!!

The funny thing to me is, as a middle eastern - a Semitic - you would be classified as Caucasian from a genetic perspective.

married a Japanese guy, who also became a very dear friend. He ended up being called as a bishop.

I have been shocked by the comments people have made about their marriage.

The white and delightsome folks in our neighborhood love my wife "Chinese/American" mostly because they want to be the one to bag a lamanites convert. They get extra points for lamanites.

inter-Cultural relationships can be a challenge of different expectations & habits, etc.

Add to that the hatred of blacks & racial strife in the 1800's U.S.; that's the position that Joe & Brigham were born into.

then, there was the LDS expectation that prophets speak for God, Well, 'it must be so!' was the dominate attitude for Mormons.

Unfortunately, that much out-lasted any positive usefulness (?) that may have been.

Even now, couples from vastly different social-economic origins can still face challenges.

BTW, I'm NOT excusing anyone

I come from very proud and spiritual Native American stock, and married a white atheist man.

Some of my relatives lost their shit, because they prefer for well educated native women to come back to the reserve, and they now finally understood that it would never happen. Didnt help that I married a white boy, even though I am half white with a Russian father.

I don't know that racism is a mormon thing, really. White supremacy, white power, is a white thing. There is an undercurrent in white culture that wants to keep the blood line white. Sentiments haven't really changed since Hitler's time. What's changed is that people are more "civil" to each other than in the past.

There is also proud blacks and proud Chinese that wouldn't think of myseginating. They love their skin and heritage and they should! There are probably more white men that are in active multiracial families because generally women will follow their husbands lead in religion? but the same doesn't hold true the other way around, men are stubborn. This doesn't have anything to do with Mormonism.

I think we're all Heinz 57 to one degree or another! We're all just people.
That said, I do think marriage stands a better chance when people are from the same basic cultural strain.
For example, my Godson is white European catholic, he married an American, dark skin from her Italian/Mexican background. She is non active catholic but was able to marry 'in the church' after classes and their civil ceremony. And ANYBODY could go to both. She's pregnant I think their child is going to be beautiful- that creamy olive color of the mix...
His sister is marrying a 2nd generation American, his family is from Tahiti or Figi, and Catholic.
So racially it's all mixed up, but religiously/culturally connected.
LDS have that sticky scripture/doctrine issue that's already changed, and will require more revisions to keep up with marriage trends!
It also could be that most girls like clean cut blonde hair blue eyed guys...ain't nothing wrong with that!!

Well I'm half native Australian and half white and I'm about to marry a white Mormon guy from Utah, everyone of his family and friends are nice to me and makes me feel welcome.

That is good to hear. Many LDS members are not racist and are fine and decent people in spite of the scriptures and doctrine. I'm glad your experience isn't like mine. If you don't mind me asking, how do native Australian LDS members view themselves in relation to Nephites and Lamanites? Do they consider themselves Book of Mormon peoples?

Most people who see my husband and I together think it's an interracial marriage. I can't tell you how many people speak spanish to my husband. He's even been asked to translate for the missionaries.

One tiny small problem. He doesn't speak any spanish. He's often mistaken for being Mexican, even by the Mexicans. We have yet to go to dinner at a Mexican restaurant without them speaking to him in spanish. I get treated much better in the Mexican area of town when i'm with DH. It can get interesting.

In reality, he's an American born German, Dutch, and English. His son who has a full blooded Polish mother, looks like American/Chinese. He went to Taiwan on his mission, so he at least knows Chinese. I like going down town Seattle with him. He can tell me when we're being talked bad about. It does happen, just because i'm white.

Racism is alive and well in small-town Utah. Like the OP said, though, white guys with ethnic wives are envied, while white girls almost never date or marry ethnic men. I've heard many disturbing, sexist, racist remarks (from both men and women) about how tiny/skinny (and therefore beautiful/desirable/hot) the ethnic women are and what hard workers they are. Bonus points if the women don't speak English very well and are happy to stay home, barefoot and pregnant, cooking and cleaning all day.