it says having kids is the most exhalted power ever. it has a picture of a baby. now, i am a 30 yr old single woman who has physical problems which mean I can't have kids. where does that leave me? is my life less exalted due to biology? am I never going to live up to what's most important to God, no matter what, just because someone hasn't decided to marry me? at least men's priesthood, which is their life calling, can be accomplished by themselves, no matter what their life situation.

it makes me sad.

If you want to have kids, I am so sorry that you are unable to.

You did not say what your status is concerning the LDS church. If you are a member who is happy in the church except for the mom-thing is adoption an option? I realize you said you are single, but adoption is a possibility in this situation also. Have you thought about counseling if the issue of having your own kids consumes your thoughts and passions?

I wish you the best, and keep sharing with us.

presleynfactsrock Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> If you want to have kids, I am so sorry that you
> are unable to.
>
> You did not say what your status is concerning the
> LDS church. If you are a member who is happy in
> the church except for the mom-thing is adoption an
> option? I realize you said you are single, but
> adoption is a possibility in this situation also.
> Have you thought about counseling if the issue of
> having your own kids consumes your thoughts and
> passions?
>
> I wish you the best, and keep sharing with us.


thanks. It's not bad enough for counceling, but I would like a family.

Wish mormons knew how offensive it is to women who can't/don't/never got the opportunity to have kids. But, don't worry, you can have kids in the next life! In this life, you can help raise other kids in the nursery! :D :D

I wonder how men would feel if their priesthood was taken away from them if they were sterile... but, don't worry, guys, you can have the priesthood in the next life! You can't be a bishop because your boy parts aren't working.

Clear message that mormon women are most valued for their reproductive organs.

I always wanted children, but that didn't happen for me. But as a young woman, though I respected mothers, valuing women just for their reproductive potential seemed distinctly wrong to me. Any b*tch can have pups. It makes having a productive uterus more important than bieng intelligent, talented, creative, kind, giving, anything about a woman beyond child-bearing is secondary.

"Any b*tch can have pups" You made my day a nonny mouse. That says it all.

The insensitivity of Mormons knows no bounds. The arrogance is limitless. And you don't even get fries with it.

And to jujubee, don't let shallow people make you feel bad, or shallow gods.

Bragging about childbirth is meaningless. Rabbits reproduce. My wife and I have a son we love very much. Her pregnancy was a natural event over which we had no control. I want to brag about how I treat him. I raised him with the freedom to interpret the world as he sees fit. I shared my resources with him, and it was my pleasure to provide for him. To Mormons children are a means to a selfish goal--an imaginary salvation. My son himself is my goal. His happiness is my own.

There was a woman in my ward who was infertile. She and her husband tried to keep it a secret, but I found out by accident one day when I was at their house that the wife was having fertility tests and treatment, and they were spending a LOT of money on it (they didn't know I found out). But after that, it all clicked for me, and now the couple have split up. Both still go to church though, and a TBMs. But it goes to show, even some currently practicing mormons are heartbroken by this. I wish them well, since it's really not their fault.

The church needs to calm down the emphasis on being mothers, giving birth, etc. I think a lot of mormon women get depression in part due to that.

That is their only pacifier; all they have of importance to cling to and brag about accomplishing.

This may not be popular to say but motherhood is a little overrated. I know three women who have never had them, my step mom being one of them. She is 87 years old and is happy as can be. She's been all over the world and done as she has pleased on her own terms with her own life. I LOVE her. And she is a part of my dad and all of us. I consider her family.

I have a friend who doesn't have them for one reason: She doesn't want to be a mom. It isn't in her.

I will tell you. There would be worse things. Those babies grow up. Life isn't all peaches and cream and they don't stay gurgling babies forever.

Ladies in the child bearing years can be pretty insensitive IMO.



Edited 3 time(s). Last edit at 10/07/2013 06:35PM by snuckafoodberry.

I am sorry you cannot have children if you want them....but I do call B.S. on that whole idea that having children is some sort of power or whatever else. Like was pointed out above, being able to reproduce is nothing but biology. Not everyone's ewuipment works, and many spend a lifetime trying to prevent it working, but it really is just biology. Reproduction. A survival of the species.

I don't want kids, and certainly don't think I am missing out or any lesser for it. Motherhood to me sounds like a trap (others may enjoy it perfectly fine...but it is not for me). There are a lot of benefits in not having kids too, even if you had expected or wanted them. Do not envy the lives of others...usually they are only showing a small part. In my experience those who need others to validate their choices to have children like that are a lot less happy than they would like others to believe.

Adoption will give you kids you really want.
Also, not that it matters, but the whole entire LD$ church is "adopted" into the house of Israel, so they can ALSO be "chosen people."

Yes, I plan on adopting / foster care when the time comes.

...I have been told flat-out that I am a "waste of oxygen" and that I must have some "grievous sin" on me or in me or some such ₵ʁ₳Ᵽ. A fellow I was dating long ago even told me I wasn't a "real woman"!

People $ƱȻҜ sometimes. All those mean, hateful souls could and did reproduce,raising a new generation of mean people.

I know what you mean. I'm not able to have children either. And it can really hurt when people isolate you or talk down to you because of it.