I just talked with a friend about how her kids (12 and under) aren't allowed to go to sleepovers because a general authority said that it can be bad. Since I'd heard other people mention this before too, I looked up the talk that mentions sleepovers. The very first line says that it's directed at parents of teenagers. A lot of people are taking that to mean that sleepovers are bad for children of any age, though. My friend said that it's because you just don't know what's going to happen when the kids are away; I said that you don't know what happens when they're on the school bus or at recess either, but that we still let them do that.

Anyway, does taking counsel to the extreme happen for everything in the church? Do leaders encourage that? What's the deal?

All I know is that several of my wives TBM family only allow "late overs" with friends, and not sleep overs. The laughable part of this is that said family do allow their children to spend time with their grandfather, who once sexually molested one of the grandchildren. But that's okay, because he has repented and has his temple recommend back!

I think lots of parents--Mormon or not--don't allow sleepovers except in very limited circumstances. My kids (6, 9) have on only a few occasions slept over at my sister's house, my brother's house, or at two very, very close family friends where I know the husband and wife very well and spent lots of time in their home. When the sleepover is at the friend's house, I'm not entirely comfortable until they come home. My younger has never slept over at a friend's house, only family. My older always has a cell phone with her on the sleepover. For me, this obviously has nothing to do with a GA talk. It has to do avoiding putting your child into a situation in which sexual molestation thrives. From work I've done, I know how often its the guy that everyone thought was the great neighbor, the great friend, the husband of the best friend, the one you would never suspect, that is abusing children that have sleepovers with his own kids. The horror stories are out there, and it's just not worth it to me. (An entirely separate issue is guns - don't want my kids in a house that may have guns). Even though I thought I was strict, there was one more close friend of two decades whose children I probably would have said yes to if they invited my older for a sleepover. Because of distance, it never really came up. And thank God. Another child, not mine, was the victim of her husband (they are no longer together because she learned the truth after this child reported to the parents and the police became involved. But how many others were there before that one?)

In any event, I do recall the GA talk was geared towards teenagers, and since I was one, and did lots of mischief on sleepovers, I know just what can happen .... :) Frankly, I'm more concerned about sleepovers at the younger age.

What about in other areas, not just the sleep over thing? Is it pretty common for tbms to take a counsel geared towards a specific demographic and make it a rule for everyone? I hadn't really thought about it before, but now I'm thinking of the caffeine thing, the garment-ready clothes on toddlers...

rainwriter is 'correct' in posing this question; Uber TBMs are apt to stretch what leaders say as Gospel... even after the disclaimers & 'speaking as a man' later disclaimers/qualifiers.

When ppl have a tough time being sensible about making their own values/principles, they CLING to what others have set out as good, trust-worthy, etc.

that's my story, and I'm sticking to it.

My niece(11) was raped at a YW sleepover by the son of counselor in bishopric. She wasn't the only one. Several other young girls including his sister.

What did the church do? Just about nothing.

The church counselors wanted to know if there was going to be a lawsuit. That was their main concern.

There was a YW sleepover at that same residence (with son home) not even two weeks later.

If you think your kids are safe at church events of any kind, think again. The church could care less about your kids.



Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 10/15/2013 03:00AM by madalice.

Not only do many mormons take the least utterance to the extreme. They can not make a decision for themselves.
This leads to more utterances and the cycle spins out if control.

One could take the GA declaration as evidence that LDS Inc junior and midlevel management such as bishops and SPs have been encountering increasing reports of child molestation.

Since LDS Inc systematically refuses to dutifully report member pervs to law enforcement, we may someday see this thing come to a head, with a judge determining punitive damages forcing LDS Inc to open their financial records for the world to see,



Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 10/15/2013 08:39AM by deco.

They probably extend the advice to younger children...just like they do with modesty. They claim that their baby girls should cover their shoulders because it will be so much easier when they get older to not have to adjust the way they dress. //:eye roll ://