I have resigned from the church. My wife has not yet, but is fully planning on it but not until our 16 yr old daughter's either on her own (which will be in a couple years) or decides to leave too as my wife doesn't want her to feel totally abandoned. Our son is in the process of resigning.

My wife and I were married in the SLC temple 22 years ago. I have long questioned if temple sealings were really legal marraiges in the eyes of the gov't. Now that I have left, in the churches eyes, my wife and I are no longer sealed. So, if the sealing is now voided, are we still married? I cannot remember the words spoken in the ceramony if the sealer had legal authority to marry people anyway. I understand in England, temple marriages are not legal and people must get married outside the temple before getting sealed.

This is how my brain has been funtioning lately...trying to clear all the mormon shit out and detox my thought process.



Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 01/18/2014 02:35PM by dcgsage.

Yes, you and your wife "is" still legally married.

As fraudulent as the temple is, they've still gone through all the legal processes to make temple sealings lawfully binding.

You two will be married until you get legally divorced through your state.

Because you have a state marriage license. You are legally married in the eyes of the law.

Yes. Legally speaking, you leaving the Morg has had zero impact on your marriage. Temple sealers (and most other religious leaders) are given legal authority from the state to enact lawfully binding marriages, however, they do NOT have any authority to dissolve those marriages. That must be done through a legal divorce.

PS. With everything going on with the marriage laws of Utah at the moment, I totally expected this to be about a lesbian couple!

Yes, your state marriage license is still valid as you had to apply for that before you went to the temple. As long as you never got a divorce through the civil court system, you're still legally married according to the state and the federal government.

Well congrats to you and that your entire family is almost out. What a wonderful feeling it will be if 16 yr. old can get the information needed, process it and not let peers keep a hold on her. I think that is the main problem you will have. So keep a check on that. At 16 they drive, are on their own at times and I KNOW this is when Mormon kids got my daughter involved in the cult. We are still close, but she did convert without telling me first. She married a Mormon guy civilly and then 3 yrs. later let them baptise her. She held out well for a bit. I know this was a situation where she was torn. But she had moved away and I had no influence then. None. So glad we are still close.

They're supposed to register your marriage with the state.

However I tried to get a copy of my marriage record from Los Angeles county a few months ago. I've been divorced almost 20 years but never had anything other than the temple one they give you that day. Just wanted to start getting things together that I might need for retirement even though I hope that's a dozen years off.

Anyway I filled the official request form out and sent the fee and a few months later got it back saying there was no record of my marriage. It may be recorded in San Bernardino county where the license was issued and I'll try that soon. But right now I'm relishing in the thought that I was never really married to that asshole. And hey, I wouldn't be lying if I call any of my kids a bastard. But since TSCC loves records and paperwork, it's probably registered. It's supposed to be anyway.

You may want to check with your divorce records. It's normally kind of difficult to get divorced without proving marriage first.

Just had to state date and place of marriage in divorce petition. Didn't have to prove anything. I'm sure they assume no one would bother to go through divorce proceedings if they never married. If one party contested the facts they might make you prove it. Also I didn't get a QDRO so no financial institution needed proof of anything.



Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 01/18/2014 11:07PM by NormaRae.

This is meant more for NormaRae than for the OP, dcdsage.

It's quite rare, but sometimes a religious wedding officiant such as a pastor, priest, or LDS priesthood holder, fails to send a copy of the marriage certificate to the county or state agency that records marriage certificates.

If the county clerk's office shows no record of marriage, then you may or might not be married. However this failure is not a guaranty of a nullified marriage. That is up to a judge to decide. It's best to see a family law attorney ASAP.

I recently heard of a couple in Los Angeles county who thought they had been married for about 30 years -- they found out they were never married, so went ahead and quickly remarried.

Your best bet is to check San Bernardino County, since that is the county in which it was issued. If there is no record of marriage there, I would set an appointment for an attorney.

It will only come into play if he kicks the bucket before I retire and a widows pension would be more than my SSI. otherwise my own SSI will be more than the half of his that I would be eligible for. If I needed to I'd get it declared a common law marriage. But like I said, it's more fun thinking I lived in sin for 18 years.

Mormons--much to their own dismay--have never worked this one out. Yes, you are still temple-sealed. Ain't nothing even they can do about this.

so you would not be married as you are no longer a member and you have recinded any eccleastical authority over you.

To remove their names from membership rolls, Mormons must write letters and are informed of the "consequences" by their bishop, including that it cancels the effects of baptism and confirmation.

dcgsage Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> This is how my brain has been funtioning
> lately...trying to clear all the mormon @#$%& out
> and detox my thought process.

Once you leave their reservation it gets clearer. In Mormon Thinking you are not "really" married even without your resignation. My wife has appeared "available" to some demented single men in her ward simply because her legal husband (me) wants nothing to do with her church.

This might be the same in other churches - the lack of marital unity in religion making some people who are most definitely NOT single appear that way.

Religion is so crazy.