Years ago as a missionary, I was told by companions, mission leaders and GAs, that if my testimony felt weakened or fragile, that I should "lose myself in the work."

Well, they got THAT right!

Today I was reading Steve Bloor's blog:

"The General Authorities of the Church are 100% correct when they say our testimonies are fragile! Of course they are, because there is no factual foundation, only a fictitious fantasy world, which though it may seem wonderful to those immersed & invested in it, is still a delusion!

"The greater the potential loss, the greater the need for superstitious ritual. Hence twice daily personal prayers, prayers with our spouses, family prayers, scripture study, church service, testimony bearing, temple attendance, home & visiting teaching, family home evenings, prayers on food, prayers for safety in travelling, continuous prayer in the heart, weekly sacrament taking, frequent hymn singing about the beliefs, frequent leadership meetings & training, regular PPIs, frequent auxiliary training meetings, payment of tithes and offerings, twice yearly Stake Conferences, twice yearly General Conferences, monthly fasting, strict rules & commandments, heavy expectations for doing family history research, having a years home food storage, daily journal writing, expectation to send children to serve on missions, etc, etc." (http://stevebloor.wordpress.com/2014/01/26/difficulties-in-leaving-the-mormon-church/)

Whew!

Reading Steve's list, I can readily see how I (meaning the REAL me) was definitely LOST (meaning unable to see the REAL TRUTH) in the "work."

Even though I stopped wandering around in TSCC's "work" years ago, it'll probably take the rest of my life to figure out just who I really am.

And it's also very sad to know that many of my loved ones are similarly "lost in the work," sometimes to the point of losing their true identities.

This is exactly what happened to me. They keep you so busy you can't come up for air. Get home from mission, go to school, get married, have kids, serve, serve, serve. You get immersed to the point you have blinders on.

I posted on another thread where one of the counselors in the bishopric mentioned that some members can't handle the hard stuff, milk before meat. All this means to me is that the member with the "weak" testimony wasn't sufficiently brainwashed, they didn't have those blinders on.

I finally said if there is something that you want me to do how much monet is in it for me? This brought requests to do for free to a halt. I haven't had a calling for years.

http://www2.law.columbia.edu/course_00S_L9436_001/North%20Korea%20materials/10%20principles%20of%20juche.html

Hmmm...Does this sound familiar?

1. We must give our all in the struggle to unify the entire society with the revolutionary ideology of the Great Leader Kim Il Sung.

2. We must honor the Great Leader comrade Kim Il Sung with all our loyalty.

3. We must make absolute the authority of the Great Leader comrade Kim Il Sung.

4. We must make the Great Leader comrade Kim Il Sung's revolutionary ideology our faith and make his instructions our creed.

5. We must adhere strictly to the principle of unconditional obedience in carrying out the Great Leader comrade Kim Il Sung's instructions.

6. We must strengthen the entire party's ideology and willpower and revolutionary unity, centering on the Great Leader comrade Kim Il Sung.

7. We must learn from the Great Leader comrade Kim Il Sung and adopt the communist look, revolutionary work methods and people-oriented work style.

8. We must value the political life we were given by the Great Leader comrade Kim Il Sung, and loyally repay his great political trust and thoughtfulness with heightened political awareness and skill.

9. We must establish strong organizational regulations so that the entire party, nation and military move as one under the one and only leadership of the Great Leader comrade Kim Il Sung.

10.We must pass down the great achievement of the revolution by the Great Leader comrade Kim Il Sung from generation to generation, inheriting and completing it to the end.