Was it difficult living with a complete stranger 24/7 for two whole years?What were some of the difficulties you encountered?

It must be the ultimate form of control having no personal space for two years of your life.

I find it very strange that members now even have to sing in the shower or else it will be reported to the mission president.

Oftentimes it was pure hell. Sometimes you got a companion who was quite compatible with you in terms of commitment level to your 2 year sentence and hobbies you enjoyed back home. Other times you get somebody who is a very bad fit, and it is hell. There were certain uber missionaries on my mission that the mp knew all the other mishies hated and he would make them companions of the disobedient mishies as punishment. You could always see the utter misery in the eyes of missionaries who had companions they didn't like and you knew people could sense it coming from you too.

It wasn't the SAME one the entire two years.
Missionaries are frequently transferred between different parts of a mission area, so companionships are frequently changed out.
I had about 10 companions in two years. Yes, I had quarrels with almost all of them.

My first companion (in the MTC) was a guy I'd worked with two years prior, pulling 12-16 hours/day. We got along fine and already trusted each other. Neither of us were from Utah, nor were we super-picky about rules. I probably had a better MTC experience than most.

After that, though -- hit and miss. I had most of a degree in psychology and had run a group home before the mission, so I ended up being the go-to person to send depressed or crazy companions to. By the time I went home, I'd had more comps that were on anti-depressants than not.

I had exactly one companion I kept in touch with after my mission.

Nevermo1. Wrote:
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> Was it difficult living with a complete stranger
> 24/7 for two whole years?What were some of the
> difficulties you encountered?
>
> It must be the ultimate form of control having no
> personal space for two years of your life.
>
> I find it very strange that members now even have
> to sing in the shower or else it will be reported
> to the mission president.


The singing in the shower bit would have been the rocket booster that blasted my @$$ back to the U.S. I love to sing, but I'll do it on my own terms, and not to convince some voyeur that I'm not engaging in improper relations with myself. Beyond that, I'd conduct an experiment if I were so inclined. I'm guessing I could play the one-tone bone-a-phone just as efficiently while singing "Choose the Right" as I could in complete silence. If anyone else cares to try it, report back to us. Choose your own hymn, even.

thanks a lot. Now my coworkers all asking me "what's so funny". . "one - tone bone-a-phone".

Wait, what? Is this a real rule that's being enforced?

Edit: nvm, saw explanation below



Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 05/13/2014 02:47AM by glibberish.

The essence of living companionably with someone is having mutual respect and tolerance for each other and allowing each other some space and privacy. It seems that missionaries are forbidden from doing this. It is so indicative of the lack of respect accorded to individuals by the Mormon church/corporation.

Horrible. Like someone said, there are good companions and bad companions and companions that are completely off their rockers and should never have served a mission. But the worst part is that they are always there. Always. There was no time to just be by yourself, recharge your batteries, do something rewarding or creative and just be alone. If you are an introvert, having someone - ANYONE - in your space like that all the time is a nightmare. Even if you got along like a house afire. Your comp was supposed to be in your sight whenever you were outside your apartment and inside your apartment, they were no farther away than the bathroom or maybe taking a nap when you were studying in the kitchen. But they were still THERE. Always. I told my teenage son just yesterday, when he was telling ME how much the mission sounded like brainwashing camp, that that togetherness was the worst part - such a nightmare I still have times where I feel crowded and have to be left strictly alone so I don't get a panic attack. I would have been an introvert no matter what but the mission experience turned it from a personality trait to a panic disorder - at least for me.

I actually forgot that you had several companions,I'm a Nevermo.

Wow,it must have been very difficult living with someone,who was almost like your shadow day in day out for whatever period of time.Especially as an introvert/with someone from a completely different culture.

I really do feel like it is a control thing though,especially regarding what someone said about strict missionaries being placed with slackers.

The new rule regarding the shower gives me the creeps too.It seems like they are increasing their control.

I was so unconcious that I didnt realize how much I was being abused.



Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 05/11/2014 05:32PM by thedesertrat1.

I had a compannion from Denmark that would get up during the night and go into the bathroom, one time I said as he passed by, "what the heck is going on"? He said this time he had just had a revelation that he was going to be the first stake president in Denmark. I thought WOW, I must be unworthy, When I got up to go to the bathroom I would spank the monkey, we were on two different planets. I have often wondered if he was a stake president after all.

dirtbikr Wrote:
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> I had a compannion from Denmark that would get up
> during the night and go into the bathroom, one
> time I said as he passed by, "what the heck is
> going on"? He said this time he had just had a
> revelation that he was going to be the first stake
> president in Denmark. I thought WOW, I must be
> unworthy, When I got up to go to the bathroom I
> would spank the monkey, we were on two different
> planets. I have often wondered if he was a stake
> president after all.

I served in Denmark in the mid-seventies. When were you there?

Kan du snakke pa Dansk?

The best two years of my life!

I might be wrong, probably wrong.



Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 05/11/2014 06:57PM by gentlestrength.

If you say something like "I know you've got a headache - why don't you pop a couple of aspirins and take a nap while I fix supper?" Even if you hated cooking, at least you could seem like you were being sweet and understanding and at least have some time and space to yourself. And If your comp did, indeed have a headache (presuming he/she had mentioned it earlier) you could probably get points for being thoughtful and compassionate.

Or "I don't mind cleaning up the kitchen, if you want to study a little bit more." You're still "together" technically, just not in each other's space.

Is that sort of thing allowed?

Why are you spending so much time in your apartment you filthy apostate?

Would be the response. Yeah, you could create moments, but only in the apartment, and the time you spend in there is tightly scheduled (between studying, eating, planning, etc.).

It was awkward at times, quite fun at other times. There was a bit of a cultural clash with one companion, me being European and her being a sheltered, naive Molly Mormon from Utah. She used to be so scared of everything. I remember eating at a members home, the family weren't well off, struggling financially and still feeding the missionary sisters. The lady of the house proudly served up a British favourite: Steak and kidney pie. My companion nearly fainted at the thought of having to eat this and squeezed my thigh and whispering: Help me! I did eat it out of respect for the host and it didn't taste bad at all, it was tasty. My companion on the other hand felt quite sick afterwards but I think it was in her head.

But to be honest, I preferred my American companions. I got to "train" a German greenie, oh my, she was an absolute nightmare, knew how to do everything better and argued with me in German, constantly. When someone opened the door to us she would say in her broken English: We tell you about Jesus, yes? And the person at the door would say: No! and slam the door. I heard complaints about her everywhere she went after she moved on.

I had two sick companions, one mentally. I was told by the mission president to not even let her be in the bathroom too long without knocking to see if she was ok for fear of her harming herself. Luckily I wasn't with her too long. The other was physically ill but they couldn't figure out what was wrong with her, so we spent a lot of time indoors, which was fine with me.
I also had a fun companion and I'm still in touch with her via facebook. We did some crazy stuff, laughed a lot, ate a lot of chocolate, and we spent time with the elders too, we made a great team and went shopping together.

It was strange when I got back, to be able to go to the postoffice and the shops on my own. For the first few days I asked my mother to go with me places.



Edited 2 time(s). Last edit at 05/12/2014 05:16AM by nomoreguilt.

It was my personal nightmare. I am a very introverted person. I don't like to talk a lot. I don't like when someone sticking at my ass. I have difficulies in social interaction, nonverbal communication. I can take EVERYTHING literal and have an odd behavior.
And I definitely hate to get touched, hugged or something like that by random dudes actually there are 2 persons who can touch me always without any bad effects for me. ( Ya I know I'm awkward some might call it kind of Asperger)

I also need time to focus on myself, to be with my self. Once we lived in a mini apartment. Everything in one room, no - absolutely no - space for privacy. And this comp I was assigned to live with was a jerk.

I totally felt deprivated on many levels and for me I had to go trough a lot of white torture.
When I got out I found myself wanting to be alone but unable to be - also unable to be with an other person next to me without getting panic. I still recover from this.

Um, I don't think it's all that different from the roommate lotto that happens in college. Ever live in a college dorm? Well, millions of nonmos and mos alike have had the dorm experience. It's not always with a friend. Sometimes, you just get assigned a roommate who is a complete stranger and you have to live with that person.

The difference is, in college, if you hate your roommate, you can move to another room. And you don't have to stay attached at the hip 24/7. If you want to be alone, you can leave.

But after a few days/weeks, that person really isn't a stranger anymore, is he/she?

Hey Travis, no I was in the England South miss 72-73

I didn't live with a stranger for 24 months.

I lived with 14 people who, since you are together 24/7, do not stay strangers for long.

One of the most disgustingly evil men I have met in my entire life was one of the 14. Another was one of the most annoying.

Living together 24/7 brings out the flaws in everyone (including yourself) but for the most part I wouldn't mind catching up with with most of them, they were mostly OK people.

Nevermo1. Wrote:
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> I find it very strange that members now even have
> to sing in the shower or else it will be reported
> to the mission president.

Huh? Is this for real? Where is this done?

Any references?

If this is for real... all I can say is "wow".

Nevin