After my decision to leave the church two weeks ago, my wife (of 18 months) and I decided to split.

I was pretty torn about it on December 23rd and decided that I'd get my drink on for the first time (plus.. i wanted to celebrate the birthday of Joseph Smith).

I went to a bar about 15 minutes from my house. Completely uneducated about alcohol, my night went as follows...

I kicked off the new life by drinking an Adios Mother-F'ker. Followed by a shot of Jack. Followed by another shot of Jack. Followed by a shot of Tequila. Followed by a shot of Crown. Followed by another Jack. Followed by another shot of Jack. Followed by a shot of Johnnie Walker. (I think that is it.. at least thats all that I remember)

I drank a lot for a light first timer. I drank a lot very fast. I was sitting the whole time so I didn't realize that you feel much more drunk standing up.

I started to make my way to my car... I remember puking like crazy. Then I remember hearing walkie-talkies going back and forth and a person trying to speak to me. The next thing I remember is, that I "awake-and-arise" the next morning in a pile of throw up, at my house, with my pants at my knees.

Confused, I looked around and found a taxi receipt in my pocket. Threw up again before I could make it to the sink. I spent Christmas Eve trying to figure out a way to get to my vehicle so I could make it to the family christmas party.

Because of this experience, I will never drink again. I have no desire to drink alcohol at all. +1 for the mormon church. But i'm sure as shit still not going back. :-)

If you feel the desire to drink again, drink like an adult. Good for you for taking a cab home, you were trashed.

Sorry to hear about the wife. That sucks and it must have been a crap situation.

I practically am I teenager... I was on the campus of my University that I'm currently attending. :-)

Heh.

Well, *water* will kill you if you drink enough of it. I enjoyed my first drinking experience because my girlfriend at the time only allowed me to have one - she wanted to seduce me slowly!

Try a screwdriver sometime, maybe two, and enjoy your warm fuzzies and leave it at that

I'm sorry, but this is one hilarious experience. This is the sort of situation that convinces long time drunks to stop drinking and seek help.
I am not going to try to convince you to ever have a drink again, I just need to know why you thought drinking that much the first time was a good idea?!? And what the hell did you drink? If you ever decide to drink again, do it in moderation, OK?

Well, I suppose that might be true of what we in the Fellowship call the "Country Club High Bottom Drunks." Those are the ones that get to the program and still have their watches, and some even have their driver's licenses...

Sadly, it requires a lot of consequences besides a hangover to motivate those who need to seek recovery (three jobs in my case; one wrecked car, two episodes of being homeless, four crashed relationships, and I still never got a DUI).

Ordinary social drinkers don't have a grasp of just what an alcoholic's tolerance can be... What John described was often a Friday--or other payday--afternoon and evening lark for me, with the serious weekend drinking to follow... And maintenance drinking of 3-4 doubles daily most of the time (beer "quit working" in the first few years).

I'll help you out a little there John; your answer to Izzy's questions is "It seemed like a good idea at the time."

I have, however, described alcoholism and not ordinary social drinking (or even some drinking that tends to be a "bit heavy"). Everyone who's been here for any length of time knows I take no position on social drinking (except having the private opinion that Native Americans probably shouldn't drink), and LDS views that drinking in moderation is sinful amount to a lot of toxic nonsense.

My friend, Stray Mutt, above, gave some good advice...

For alcoholics, though, the issues of choice and will power are irrelevant... How strong is the compulsion?

Well, if you're a guy, trying to abstain is about like going to a beach in Rio or the Riviera and not looking at the gal's bobbies...

.. I just didn't know how much was "too much"

While I was sitting there, I felt a little tipsy, but had no idea how drunk I was...

"I kicked off the new life by drinking an Adios Mother-F'ker. Followed by a shot of Jack. Followed by another shot of Jack. Followed by a shot of Tequila. Followed by a shot of Crown. Followed by another Jack. Followed by another shot of Jack. Followed by a shot of Johnnie Walker. (I think that is it.. at least thats all that I remember)"

Uh. Well, ya see, that's your problem right there. You drank way, WAY too much, way, WAY too fast and way WAY too many types of alcohol mixed together. This is a recipe for precisely what happened to you: memory loss, vomiting, hangover. Hey, at least you took a cab! That's pretty much the one good decision you made and it is the most important decision you could make. So good on you for that.

As others have pointed out, you're drinking like a teenager away from home for the first time. For me, personally, I will never touch Southern Comfort again due to an experience I had with it at age 19. I'm 42 now. Never. Again.

I completely understand why you would take "The Pledge" (i.e., Never. Again) after a night like that. And, truth be told, if that's the way you're going to drink, it's probably best you avoid it.

Next time you mow the lawn on a hot summer day, try an ice cold beer afterwards. THAT will be a rewarding experience for you.

Good luck. And I am indeed sorry about you and your spouse. No wonder you were in the mood you were in. Take care of yourself!

Cool story.

It reminds me of the fact that I'm never going to eat crackers again because the first time I ate crackers, I bought seven different kinds of crackers, then proceeded to shove them into every orifice of my body until I was crying from the pain.

Don't blame the drug, dude.

I can't believe you damn alkies are encouraging John to keep drinking!
John, don't listen to these lushes!

I this its kind of sweet, your innocence about alcohol. But sad about your marriage. It probably seemed like a good idea at the time.

What you did is like saying you'll have some ice cream and eating the whole gallon. Is that the way you do everything? If I drank an entire pitcher of lemonade, I'd feel pretty terrible too, but I'm a little hypoglycemic.

Here's another analogy, to drive this home. A few Oreos will do no harm, but don't eat the whole package at once.

I don't feel the least bit sorry for you. What you did was really dumb. Look up "alcohol poisoning", followed by "self control", and remember to act like an adult after this.

(Verbal slap upside the head, which you seem to need.)

I don't feel sorry for myself either...

Its just a fun monday morning story. ha

Throwing up was your well-deserved punishment. Thank some survival instinct in the back of your head for you taking a taxi (MAYBE that was the bartender who should have cut you off waaaaay earlier, if so, you should go ask and thank him for saving your life and quite possibly the lives of others).

As Duder said: don't blame the drug for your amateurish stupidity.

Beer has been on my training table since I was a kid. Never came close to having such an incident. You probably ought to stay off the stuff. Admittedly, I drink for the buzz. My first hangover cured me of drinking to get drunk.

I've also got this thing about not dying horribly or killing otherwise innocent folk.

Alcohol can enhance the fun in many situations. Drowning your sorrows would not be one of them.

Timothy



Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 12/27/2010 01:25PM by Timothy.

I'm so sorry that you are going through so much stress and pain right now.

You can thank the church for much of it, I'm sure.

This is perfect fodder for a lesson on the Word of Wisdom and the power of that evil, wily character Satan and his minions to control you! That's what happens when you "loose the spirit" and forget obedience to the commandments! You were tempted to sin.
(Here is where a lesson on the sacredness of marriage can be inserted and keeping the Lord in your lives...yada yada...)

How am I doing? Sound familiar? :-)

Maybe later, you'll try some good wine, or a mild drink and enjoy it, slowly, rather than drink too much too fast.
The point is to enjoy what you are doing. I see, you missed that part! :-)

I like strong drinks... like Rockstars. I'll continue to drink those along side my green tea. mm

I've only been out of the church for a little over a year and I've sworn off alcohol 3 times already.

And yet, I got pretty loaded on wine over the weekend.

Shit.

At least not this year. ;-)

Once upon a time, Mrs. Duder left me to my own devices for a couple of weeks. That Sunday, I poured myself a giant (probably 32 ounce) whiskey and soda, then proceeded upstairs with that and a six pack of Bass to watch some football. An hour or two later, I decided I wanted some chips. I stood up and stumbled to the stairs. I woke up at the bottom of the stairs later that evening, a bit bloodied and bruised.

I no longer drink whiskey upstairs. Down with stairs!

HAHA! Love that one

Sounds like some of my nights as a late teen. Then I found Gawd. I think I'd have been better off just learning to drink like an adult. Too bad there was no one around to give me that piece of advice.

Yeas later I've given up on finding Gawd and learned to drink like an adult. Interestingly there are still adults my age (late40's) that drink like kids.

I react very violently to alcohol. The last time I had any was at the wedding of a cousin. My immediate family had come in from all California and Mississippi (where I was stationed). My dad and his brother (the bride's father) hadn't spoken in something like 10 years. They had brought a bottle of then-55-year-old scotch or bourbon and took a shot of it in an attempt to get them to reconcile. I got sick very quickly. This was in 1982. I've not had any sort of alcoholic beverage since then.

well i am of the opinion that what has transpired is good.... John did what a lot of us did at that young an age.....and if you never imbibe again....so what.... no biggy!! :)... but if you do.... make sure that you eat some carbs.... dont even get near a car.....(you got lucky if you heard "walky talky's)... and take it easy with the amount you drink.... your body can only process 1 drink an hour .. so keep that in mind.... and drink...LOTS OF WATER!! ANYWAY... SUCKS THAT YOU ARENT MARRIED ANYMORE.... at least ya got that out of the way!! :)

...in book Breaking the Spell.
He argues that religion evolved naturally, as incidentally or coincidentally "fit" behaviours were generationally amplified.
Abstaining from alcohol has some obvious protections. You don't need to be a Mormon to see that.
And, Dennett argues that by breaking the spell you inevitably give up some of the incidental "charms" of the myth.
The Word of Wisdom is a myth. God never spoke it. But it has naturally-selectable "fitness" and "charm" nonetheless.
I drank-to-puking often as a teen, and I'll never go back to that. I haven't had a drink as an apostate yet, and honestly there's a certain "charm" to having abstained from alcohol for 20 years, and I want to spend the charm, if I decide to, on something special (like perhaps my wife's first drink if she ever decides to).

Bitch

aww c'mon Baddy... most guys that drink have done that.... especially guys who are that same age!! he regrets it..... so it seems to me.... and he learned a lesson!! aint that grand?

John = Lightweight

Next time go to the bar with a clue and you might enjoy alcohol. Geez, like a junior high student raiding their parents bar that one.

If the story IS true, then that bartender is incredibly irresponsible.