Date: June 26, 2014 01:13AM
I live in the Morridor, so I'm used to families taking their entire brood to the grocery store and wreaking havoc, shoving me out of their way, etc. But recently I've noticed pushy, rude Mormons elsewhere, too, like the local park and even the sidewalk in my neighborhood.
A few weeks ago my writing group met at a local park. It was pretty crowded, being a Saturday afternoon. Barbie and Ken Mormon, with about twenty-five little kids in tow, approached our pavilion and asked when we were going to leave, because they needed to have a birthday party for their daughter. They hadn't reserved a pavilion or anything, but showed up with all those children and balloons anyway. As they stood their with fake, pointy-toothed smiles plastered on, it was clear they expected us to vacate. We didn't. A little later, they came over and started putting down their tablecloths and party ware, even though we were still seated and obviously not done.
"Don't let us rush you or anything," they said in that sickly-sweet tone as they pushed our food and manuscripts out of their way. We eventually left, but were not happy about it.
Tonight, I was walking on a public sidewalk when I heard bicycle noises behind me: an entire Mormon family of six or seven, cycling down the sidewalk. Instead of moving onto the street (where there was no traffic and not likely to be any, given that I live on the edge of town) or allowing me time to get out of their way, they went right past me on the sidewalk, forcing me to flatten myself against the chain-link fence so as not to get hit. "Thank you," one of them said in that same passive-aggressive tone as they whizzed past.
It seems like Mormons with their kids in public just expect everyone to get out of their way. This kind of thing seems to be happening more and more, too -- at restaurants, movie theaters, malls -- anywhere they go.