I was watching some You Tube clips and there was an old variety show hosting the Bee-Gee's in 1963. They were making Wind-Up Doll jokes. A couple of thoughts popped into my head for LDS wind-up dolls.

" Did you hear about the Gordon Hinkley wind up doll?"
" You wind it up and it purchases forgeries."

" Did you hear about the Paul Dunn wind up doll?"
" You wind it up and it pitches a no-hitter in the World Series."

You clever people out there can come up with some other funny ones I bet.

How about the little dolls that can pee? You could have Boydy Voidy, or Dieter Peeter, or Wetsy Bednar.



Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 07/03/2014 09:51PM by donbagley.

Kimball was president when the church was buying Hofmann forgeries.

There were a few big name but clueless mormon leaders involved:

http://www.utlm.org/newsletters/no115.htm

You could wind up Boyd, and he still wouldn't move!
(I know, That's mean. I should be spanked.)

The apologists wind up doll just keeps going in circles.

Did you hear about the Jeffrey Holland wind-up doll?
You wind it up and it ways, "Yes, I am a dodo, a dodo I am."

...introducing Marie Osmond's newest talking wind-up doll;

"The Chatty Ally Isom"...she doe's everything right!...comes complete with Authorized CTR ring!

Certified and approved by Intellectual Reserve.

The Joe Smith doll - you find it up and it f*cks everything in sight.

Did you hear about the Thomas Monson wind-up?
Wind it up and it comes up with a thousand ways to close a talk without saying, "I know the Church is true".

Did you hear about the Jeffrey Holland wind-up?
Wind it up and its jowels function as a sex toy.
Wind it up and it feels threatened and gets defensive.

Did you hear about the Richard G. Scott wind-up?
Wind it up and it steals all your Xanax.

Did you hear about the David Bednar wind-up?
Wind it up and it dry humps your deacons quorum.
Wind it up and it awkwardly imitates human beings.
Wind it up and it shows you its pickle.
Wind it up and its eyebrows disappear.

Did you hear about the Spencer Kimball wind-up?
Wind it up and it goes from masturbation to homosexuality to beastiality in two minutes.
Wind it up and it tries to mouth kiss men.
Wind it up and watch it struggle to comprehend cause and effect.

Did you hear about the Mormon wind-up?
Wind it up and hear it lie, obfuscate, filibuster, get offended, compete with other Mormon wind-ups, rip you off in business, try to sell you something multi-level, say things it never thought about or absolutely doesn't believe, make excuses, judge others, and somehow still feel morally superior to all other wind-ups.

Wind up D Todd Christofferson and nobody pays attention to what it does.