Posted by:
elciz
(
)
Date: July 25, 2014 10:04AM
Like many of you, I discovered Mormonism is "false". BUT, I grew up in it, went on a mission, married in the temple, and had 5 kids, all who believe in it, except one.
So I'm essentially "out", but there were consequences. I had to accept that a huge swath of my life (time and money) was given to something of essentially very little value. I have had (and continue) to live with a spouse who still believes and thinks I've been "deceived". I believe four of my kids may share that view, but not admit it. I have to continue to live around Mormons. I have to continue to live certain practices that are silly (like not drinking coffee, not shopping on the "sabbath", etc.).
In a sense I am a "damaged" person because of my affiliation through birth into a religious cult. I'll always be damaged or at least viewed as damaged by loved ones and neighbors.
Some people leave Mormonism when they are young, maybe 18 or 20 and they essentially begin to live a life without Mormonism. They marry based on their own criteria, absent of a requirement that someone be "a good Mormon". They might have kids and raise them to never know anything Mormon. For these types, they can lead an almost normal life and the damage done was done, but is not extensive.
But for many of us, we will be people who have issues. Arms and legs blown off, so to speak. Crippled in some way. Doing the best we can, but limited by the immersion in Mormonism. Our lives are forever altered by the experience we had. We may be able to change a few things, but many things are set and not changeable. Like our kids continuing to follow Mormonism, or our spouses continuing to follow Mormonism. We may see huge decisions we made as "mistakes" based on our affiliation in the Mormon cult (like who we married).
I believe the benefit for many of us in leaving is probably not going to show up in our lives right now anyway. It will show up in the lives of some of our children and grandchildren who will not be shackled into Mormonism. They will be the ones who will grow up "normal". They may drink a little as young adults, they may smoke a joint, they may live with someone before they marry. They may enjoy a beer on Saturday evening at a restaurant. They'll be normal. They won't wince of look over their shoulder when they do these things or any number of other things. Hopefully they will develop their own set of "values" and live by them. THEY will benefit from our choices we made to leave the Mormon cult.
But we may be stuck living in the rubble, so to speak. Of course we will try to make the best of it.