I just got back in from gardening and I found a curious-looking rock when digging around. I put my laptop in the other room, with this posting on the screen. Then I took the rock out and interpreted this as being a message from a former Gadianton Robber.
"In His plan there are no true endings, only everlasting beginnings." --Dieter F. Uchtdorf
My name is Dieter Uchtdorf, and I testify that the lord inspired mankind to invent Viagra to rectify this problem of erectile dysfunction. A tablet of Viagra, no doubt, is going to change your sexual life for ever. No more worry about no true endings. Put an end to your everlasting beginnings. Always take viagra for your impotency issues only after consulting the physician. It is always prescribed to use Vigara tablet an hour before engaging with your partner.
It's a stolen quote from the marketing department at Pfiser the makers of the blue pill.
Clearly wrong, as damnation means there is an end to things in the Mormon god's plans.
Maybe he should attend church every now and again to bone up on Mormon doctrine....I mean, if you're gonna be a Mormon apostle, the least you can do is know basic LDS 101 facts.
Just sayin....
Maybe he could start by retaking the missionary discussions?
Yes, the scripture can usually be found inside a fried, folded piece of sweetened dough. You can generally find it at your local Asian-themed restaurant.
Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 05/25/2014 08:05PM by schmendrick.
"In His plan there are no true endings, only everlasting beginnings"
I'm studying up on various Eurolanguages again. And that's not what Dieter said. Germans have a thick, thick accent. He said.... In dis pan, der ar no twoo dendins. only ebberlashin bigIndins.
He was talking about a frying pan, and big Indians / or Lamanites whom apparently "lash" or self flaggelate.
Or else they're still wearing "WarPaint" / mascara, etc. :P lov you SM. keep postin'. Always. Sam!!
There's probably some verse somewhere that could be interpreted that way.
What I find really interesting about it is that it really highlights the huge difference between the LDS concept of eternity and the mainstream Abrahamic understanding of it. In traditional Judaism, Christianity, and Islam, "eternity" is a never-ending NOW. There is no experience of time as a sequence of moments or events. This is actually the same basic concept in Hinduism and Buddhism. Eternity is the state of the Absolute, outside of sequential time and therefore outside the realm of conscious experience. There can be no events, because events have to be experienced sequentially and therefore can only take place in the manifest world.
In the LDS version, "eternity" (or "the eternities," as I've heard some express it) is just a really, really long version of earth-time. Events will still happen, like the creation of worlds, the conception and birth of spirit children, etc. The only difference between manifest time and "eternity" in the Mormon view is really immortality.
And it's really kind of odd, because the LDS marriage rite differentiates between "time" and "eternity." The childishness of Joseph Smith's conception of eternity as essentially no different from manifest time, except for immortality, is one of the best arguments for his lack of education. He doesn't seem to have been exposed to the Church Fathers or any more advanced theology than the average church-goer might have heard in an average Protestant Sunday service.