Perfectionism "correlated" with absolutism is what Mormonism is at its core paired with an insane worship of traditional family.

The Mormons take making traditional family a myth to the most religious extremes. I think that The Mormons are probably the religion most into worshiping a myth of family. They even try to retroactively make dead people into their ideal of family but wait, there's more. They have a doctrine of polygamy so not only is their traditional family worship so crazy that they are baptizing and sealing dead people into traditional families, they are honoring very polygamist dead families so their worship of traditional families is not traditional in the sense of a modern understanding of nuclear families.

They worship traditional families in the sense of Abraham, Isaac, and Jacob traditional families. So they are super old school in their holding up an ideal of family in their doctrines and practices. So old school that they are Old Testament old school. But wait, there's more.

They think Christianity started before Jesus and it did so across the ocean in The New World. So they are New World Christians worshiping an (ancient) Old World myth of family.

How do they do it? They do it with absolutism (as opposed to relativism) and perfectionism.

So to be a good Mormon you have to be a New World Christian with a Pre-Christian almost Pre-historic adoration of what it means to be a family and you have to do it believing in nothing in between something always being either right OR wrong in your ethics while all the while trying to perfect yourself in these things.

Talk about a fool's errand.

Eternal dysfunction at its finest. We put the fun in dysfunction.

interesting observation.
Food for thought.

the LDS code-word for absolutism is 'exactness'.

I think they('re wise enough to) avoid the concept of Perfectionist / Perfectionism.

Maybe times have changed but I remember being indoctrinated into thinking I was to try to perfect myself in this life.

I think this is why a huge percent of utah mormons are running for the drug counter to escape.It doesn't make sense.

Couple that with their claim that they have the truth, restored gospel and a prophet to teach people jesus truths,,,well, they have the perfect storm for the mess they've created.

Right? They have more of the truth than other religions. They have a plan for happiness and salvation.

They are absolutists.

"This moral compass is built around four absolute truths."
https://www.lds.org/general-conference/1997/10/four-absolute-truths-provide-an-unfailing-moral-compass?lang=eng

They are perfectionists.

"How does baptism help make perfection possible?"
https://www.lds.org/manual/preparing-for-exaltation-teachers-manual/lesson-22-striving-for-perfection?lang=eng

They think that being absolutist and perfectionist is following a plan of happiness and salvation.

They are like you said creating a "perfect storm" for the human psyche to find itself in an impossible situation which they claim their proper form of repentance leads people from but it doesn't.

It doesn't remove the hopelessness one feels in attempting to follow a plan, believe a philosophy, and live a human life without them through their lay member leaders reassuring the miserable and despairing member that the member is forgiven and is "doing it right."

Any cognitive dissonance that comes up and it will can't be fixed with repentance. Doubting your doubts won't fix it. The only thing that will is what Jeff Holland does - trust LDS Inc. over his own senses.

http://exmormon.org/phorum/read.php?2,1413333



Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 10/26/2014 07:34PM by Elder Berry.

Hi Elder, I'm posting this here as your other post has 39 entries and has been hijacked...

I'm very sorry for what you experienced with your Dad. I work a lot with men who are either in prison or who served time and are out. Several are registered sex offenders. I'm not a certified psychologist, and can only offer observations based on friendship. The men I work with are generally younger and need a mentor and friend to help them. I really didn't know that my life's journey would take me on this path. I'm actually grateful for my guys--for helping to show me one on my life's purposes.

I grew up in an abusive alcoholic family and have stopped those behaviors cold with my family. Ironically, my guys often have alcohol or drug issues and that gives us lots to talk about. The notion is that they can stop the behaviors cold, too.

When we talk or visit, we never talk about "why". I doubt that most can say why or what caused them to "cross the line." The men I work with are very dear to me because they've done bad things and are not bad men--they have been shunned by society. I can't think about the pain the victims or their families have experienced. But, I know that it's in everyone's best interest that they NEVER repeat the crimes. They have to have people who care and support them regardless of what they did.

I'm telling you this Elder because i know something of the pain and betrayal you must feel. From reading your posts, I know that you have a sharp intellect, care about your family, and have been deeply hurt by an organization that was supposed to love and support you.

Elder, you can stop any family dysfunction from your parents. That said, I hope that there were good things that they imparted to you.

I hope that none of this was offensive, that would have been my last intention. I hope that you experience peace with your family's past, joy with your future, purpose for your life, and happiness. Boner.

byuboner Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> I
> can't think about the pain the victims or their
> families have experienced.

Can they?

I don't know why some victims of abuse become abusers. I didn't read that my father was a victim of abuse.

I don't know if the man who abused me was a victim of abuse but I haven't become an abuser.

The betrayal I felt in being abused was that what I was looking for in this man was something I felt lacking from my parents and I would never have gone to them to tell them I was abused because it would have made the betrayal worse. They would claim that I dreamed it up or if they acknowledged it hushed it up.

Years ago, they committed to "the family" as their business model. So, another "not inspired" decision by the big boys. Their system is setup for a society that no longer fits/tolerates their model. Yet their continuing revelation claim has them in a bind, so they hold the course. Now, they wait for society to force them to change so they can etch-a-sketch their way out of it.