and realize it never would have worked?

OMG I recently came across an old girlfriend's FB page. GAG! She was so hot years ago. Now she is married to a real straight arrow and so TBM I can't believe it. This would have caused all kinds of stress had we married.

For the longest time I was heartbroken after we broke up and thought I was really missing something. Now I'm just in awe at how TBM she has become...eeeewww.

Any one else do this? The church can make a cool person really weird.

I dated my girlfriend from college for awhile after my divorce. We hadn't seen each other in 17 years. When we were in college, I was the returned missionary and she was the closet unbeliever. When we caught up again, she had been working for the Church for many years, and I am now fairly antagonistic toward it. We were spectacularly wrong for each other. We dated for a few months and then split up.

I dated this super-TBM guy in high school for about 3 of the 4 years, on and off. I recently found out that his wife left him because she read "anti-Mormon" literature and left the church. He wanted to keep working on the marriage but she found a non-LDS guy she liked better. My ex-boyfriend is still very faithful to the Mormons, even though his former wife and his kids are trying to fill his head with those "anti-Mormon lies", according to his cousin. My mom said she ran into this guy at a funeral several years ago and didn't even recognize him because this formerly skinny, 5'10 musician was now about 300 pounds. And my mom isn't skinny herself, so she'd never say something like that to be catty nor would she exaggerate. Mom said I wouldn't even know him now. The weight gain wouldn't bug me, except for health reasons, but I'd be stuck in a Molly Mormon nightmare right now if I'd married him. Because if he went through all that and STILL believes, he probably won't ever change. Unlike my DH who still claims to be Mormon but doesn't act like he cares much if we go to church anymore.



Edited 2 time(s). Last edit at 03/23/2011 04:35PM by CA girl.

She was a barrel of laughs. Funny as hell. Drank any guy under the table! Swore like a sailor. Promiscuous like no one I ever knew. Once she said to a bunch of us girls, "I like to [.....] and I don't care who with.

She's now married to an RM, temple marriage, grandkids, church callings up the kazoo.

(Incidently, my TBM college+ boyfriend of 5 years is now a non-believer. He continues to wear garments so as not to upset family, and lied to get a TR so he could be at his daughter's marriage. He was recently called in to the bishop's office and told to repent, pray, read the BOM and stop discussing doctrinal issues with impressionable friends.)

Twinker Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------

> (Incidently, my TBM college+ boyfriend of 5 years
> is now a non-believer. He continues to wear
> garments so as not to upset family, and lied to
> get a TR so he could be at his daughter's
> marriage. He was recently called in to the
> bishop's office and told to repent, pray, read the
> BOM and stop discussing doctrinal issues with
> impressionable friends.)


What's his moniker here? ;)

If he's reading here or posting, he hasn't told me.

When we were dating, I was a nevermo and he was a temple-married divorced guy. His father-in-law was the bishop and managed to get a temple divorce for them so his daughter could marry someone else. Not his idea and he was deeply hurt.

He stopped wearing garments cause he thought he wasn't supposed to once he'd had a temple divorce and his mother 'bout had a heart attack when she found out. So he's worn them ever since.

I thought the garms were the most ridiculous things I'd ever seen. (Yes, I saw them! Shut up!! I was 21 and virtuous!)

I always questioned him about various aspects of the church and he was sincere and rather superstitious about church matters. Makes me laugh now to see he finally figured it out, mostly after reading and visiting the Tanners. His words: "Looks to me like it was always about money, power and sex". Hell, I tried to tell him that 45 years ago!!

Anyone know Nick S. from Sunset Utah who went to BYU Hawaii?

Or John M. who was at BYU Hawaii?

Or Dave F. who went to San Juan High School/Citrus Heights?

Early 60s



Edited 2 time(s). Last edit at 03/23/2011 04:54PM by AnonyMs.

... all of them transformed into the "mollys" they were destined to be in the morg (just the way the GA like'em).

It is sad to realize these very dynamic free spirits in their youth could have so drastically turned to "the dark side" and become such TBM women (priesthood slaves).

A forth ... not quite gf:

One of the most charming girls I had a real deep crush on (never dated) was found by her son turned up face down in her own hot tub at a much too young age at her Sandy home. I don't know about her church status, but I hope she enjoyed a bit of freedom in life without the cult before her untimely death.

Not exactly, but I've seen hotties from High School, the cheerleader it girls, on fb and couldn't believe it.

They all turned into their mothers. Not a bit of hottie left in them. And they post the typical TBM status building stuff that is so not hot.

Couldn't believe it when I went on fb.

Most of the mormon girls I had sexual escapades with are now TBM wives of some priesthood holder. I noticed one was the wife of a new mission president that was in the Church News a few years back.

It seems like they play around in their teens before the temple marriage shackles come on. I played around with my wife before we were married and she morphed into a serious TBM after we were married and the garments went on. We lived a few years that way.

It's years of indoctrination. I never was a very good TBM. I was always breaking rules and never was a good garment wearer.

Yeah this girl was definitely the horniest of all I dated. She has morphed into a card-carrying garment-wearing TBM married to a peter priesthood Boy Scout leader. I stand all amazed.

Yes, right about a year before I left the church, and low and behold, he was the a coun. to the stake pres., and OMG, I told him all the stuff I no longer believed in and he advised me in his stake pres. counselor voice to stick with it and be faithful and quit calling old married boyfriends.

I was 18 years old. We dated several months and had fun. I learned a few years ago that he's the birth father of an adopted son of one of my good friends. He was a bishop at the time, and he and his family took in a 14 year old girl who had been sexually abused. His wife was pregnant with baby boy #5, and he got the 14 year old pregnant. The stake president tried to sweep it under the rug, but it came out and he served prison time.

I googled him not long ago. He's a total jerk. He has a website on which he makes excuses for all that he did. And he advocates and supports prostitution in Thailand - he has a separate website with all sorts of information and advice, including prices for different services. Bastard.

Boy did I dodge a bullet with that one.

TG



Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 01/02/2014 07:20PM by Susan I/S.

I'd say that you did. He was my bishop at the time this happened.

Well, though she was a high school crush, I didn't date Gail and didn't know she was a BIC product of a multigenerational Mormon family who ditched Mormonism as soon as she hit 18. She still has Mormon friends and relatives though, and physically, she's held up quite well.

Then there's Donna. I didn't know she was TBM in high school (she certainly was) but I'm aware that she's still TBM now.

I haven't been able to locate Sandy J. from Chico, CA., or Lisa R. from USMA, NY. For all I know, they might be on this board. If so, hello ladies. Lisa was TBM when I knew her but seemed to have 'issues' that could have lead her to leave. Sandy seemed to want to be TBM but she also had 'issues'.

She is way out of my league, but 30 years later we're still pals. She and hers and me and mine sit together in church.

Every once in a while we'll walk in the chapel arm in arm just to get the gossip mill going.

Yeah I had a TBM girlfriend in high school who dumped me when I wouldn't go on a mission. I knew she would but I didn't think she was worth going on a mission.

She married an RM she met at BYU and has since had 7-8 kids. I've got nothing against her but I'm sure glad she dumped me. If we'd have stayed together it would have been a disaster.

nonmembers. Couldn't beat the nonmembers off. There were some who "hung out" with me in the singles' ward. I saw one of them on TV a few years back (he was on the news because his house burned down) and I couldn't believe I ever even thought he was marriage material.

I did look up the guy I wished I had married at age 20 some 6 years ago--we are together now (I'm 53).

Good for you!

You "couldn't beat the non members off?"

That's one of the biggest complaints most teenagers had.

There was a boy I was crushing on hard when I was about 15/16. We got along great and hung out at YM/YW activities. He always made a point to dance with me a few times at any of the dances. We had such a great connection. I could never understand why he didn't ask me out (once I was old enough).

Eventually, I gave up any hope that he was into me and moved on. Had a nonmormon BF for most of high school, but we broke up at the end of my junior year. In the meantime, this mormon boy had done his year at Ricks College and was about to go on his mission (he was a year older than me). So he was sort of out of the scene and his younger brother -- who was a year younger than me -- started showing interest.

One day, we had a snow day and no school. The younger brother called me at like 10 in the morning to warn me that his Turbo-TBM mom (who was also my YW president at the time) was on her way over to my house to talk to me. Both my parents were at work; I was home alone.

Sure enough, about ten minutes later, this woman pulls into the driveway -- without having called first or even asking if I was available to see her. She said she wanted to take me out to lunch to talk to me. So she took me to Denny's and proceeded to inform me that, years back, her older son had liked me very much and begged and begged her to let him ask me out. She refused to let him. She told me that she was concerned about me dating her son because she thought I danced too suggestively at the dances.

What she didn't say, but what was clearly implied: her husband was the bishop who made me go through a court of love and disciplined me for letting myself get raped. She thought I was a filthy slut and she didn't want me screwing her son. Nevermind my side of that story; the fact that it was obvious the bishop had spilled the beans and there was no privacy or respect for one's repentance process infuriated me.

Then she pointed out how her second son was much more persistent and aggressive about bugging her for permission to take me out. She put every obstacle she could think of in that kid's way, and bless his little rebel heart, he persevered. She told me she was going to acquiesce and allow him to date me, but she wanted to lay down the ground rules first.

• Her son was to come home from all dates with me still completely temple/mission-worthy and if he wasn't, she'd hold ME responsible. It would my job to control his behavior.

• We weren't allowed to date three times in a row. Every third date, he had to date someone else. This worked out fine by us. We'd set it up so he'd take my BFF out and I'd be picked up by his BFF and when we got to the game/dance/whatever, we'd just swap. My TBM dad thought this workaround was HILARIOUS and encouraged me. :D

• He wasn't allowed to get his driver's license until he got his Eagle Scout, which he was not remotely interested in. I had mine and didn't mind driving. Even though dad made fun of us because the girl drove us everywhere, neither of us gave a flip. It was fine by us.

Then she did the one thing you don't ever do to an abuse victim. She told me she was respecting me like an adult to have this very mature conversation with me, so she expected me to keep this confidential, like adults. You never ever have a conversation with a kid who was punished for being abused and tell her to keep it a secret. That was a giant red flag to me and I knew I was being played.

So the minute my dad got home, I sat him down in the kitchen and told him every detail of the conversation. I told him how hurt and angry I was that Sister Rogers didn't seem the least bit concerned about my wellbeing or temple-worthiness. All she cared about was her kid, nevermind the fact that he was in control of HIS behavior and maybe my dad would like it if I came home from dates with HIM with MY temple-worthiness intact. I was also really pissed off that I'd supposedly been though the repentance process and had been reinstated as a full-fledged worthy YW, so if that was really true and I'd really been forgiven, then why did I even have to have that conversation with her? Obviously, there is no redemption, there is no repentance, there is no forgiveness, and there are no blessings for overcoming your trials.

I should have thanked that woman because she taught me that everything I'd been taught in church was a friggin' lie and none if it meant anything.

After she left, I called the guy back, told him what we'd talked about and what I agreed to. I told him if he still wanted to go out, I'd be delighted, but only because he'd been kind enough to give me a heads up that his tigermama was stalking me and on her way over to blindside me with her judgmental bullshit. We dated for a few months, kissed very chastely maybe once, and I flitted off to college and never saw either one of those brothers ever again.

I would love to know where both of 'em are, but I suspect their BIC programming ran so deeply that both of 'em are probably temple married with a bunch of kids and I'd bet the farm they are miserable at least 50% of the time. I still think that older son would have made a great partner and had we managed to get together and keep it together, I have no doubt I'd be a married mormon woman living in Idaho somewhere with a handful of kids. I would also either be heavily medicated or possibly suicidal. Either way, nothing would have been more miserable than to become that bitch's daughter-in-law.

Dodged a bullet.

2 guys--I'd be surprised! I'd love to know what happened to them!

I would too. I'd sure hate to name names, but they moved to Ohio from Chicago, but the parents were originally from Idaho. I think both guys ended up going back to Idaho, but I have no idea what happened to anyone in the family. Their dad had some fancy engineering gig that took them all over the world. They had lived in Australia and several other places. I've asked my dad about that family, and he must have not thought much of them because he seems to have lost track of where they went. They have really common names, so google searches have revealed nothing.

dogzilla Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> I would too. I'd sure hate to name names, but they
> moved to Ohio from Chicago, but the parents were
> originally from Idaho. I think both guys ended up
> going back to Idaho, but I have no idea what
> happened to anyone in the family. Their dad had
> some fancy engineering gig that took them all over
> the world. They had lived in Australia and several
> other places. I've asked my dad about that family,
> and he must have not thought much of them because
> he seems to have lost track of where they went.
> They have really common names, so google searches
> have revealed nothing.

Have you tried a search at http://www.zabasearch.com ?

Actually, I may have found the older one.

Anyone from Kearns or West Jordan, UT, please email me at Dogzilla at comcast dot net.

Looks like the younger one might be in Rexburg.

Dudes, zabasearch is scary. If it's the right two people, I have maps to their houses. Ew. Creepy. I must go search on my own name now to see what you find.

Yes - and her TBM husband still thinks she saved herself for his RM ass!

When I'm feeling cheeky I dream of asking him if she still has that cute little birth mark you could only know about by knowing someone in the Biblical sense.

No, the first thing I did when I joined Facebook was to block my TBM ex-husband. I did find that his former roommate who was extremely TBM did move to Utah to be close to his family, as the only reason he was living as a roommate was to finish college. I didn't send that person a FB friend request because I knew that once he really saw my profile, he wouldn't want to be my FB friend.

I've seen really hot girls I dated grow up and put on the pounds at age 24 from cranking out babies. Their boobs probably look like saltwater taffy being made from brats chomping and pulling on them. What a waste of youth.



Edited 2 time(s). Last edit at 03/24/2011 04:55PM by athreehourbore.

There's the TBM MILF who was 8 years older than me, who I lusted after mightily.... she, was a divorcee and a convert. WE had a special relationship which was quite close, but always platonic (much to my chagrin).
she moved away to Hastings and, later, got married. I went as far as looking her up on a couple of social networking sites, but - as I never knew her married name - no luck.

The only BIC, mormon royalty girl I ever went out with, ended up marrying a convert (converted before he met her, not because of her). He left TSCC after a couple of years.
They divorced. She was always uber-TBM and I am pretty sure it was due to her family ties.