It hit me about three months ago: the heartache of my divorce was gone, and it won't come ever back. And all the old church issues were long gone.

I felt good. I had a new project I was throwing myself into, new friends, new hope, new duds, a new place to live, and even a new flame who adored me as much as I adored her. After having felt so broken for so long, I now dared to hope I had become a "new and improved" version of myself.

In all that newness, only one vestige of the Old Me remained: Hugo cologne. The blue stuff in the clear bottle. I'd found it one day in a mall in Ventura, California, not long after it came out when I was still a Mormon. After a two hour smell test which included dozens of other colognes, it beat out all the competition, so I got it. Over the following months and years, it's sharp, fresh, clean smell just became part of my thing.

But now...it seemed wrong. It was Old Me. I needed New Me. What cologne was New Me? I had no idea, but I needed it to just...I don't know...represent a break with my past. When I smelt the Hugo, in the back of my head it was like: "remember? You're the sap who believed Joseph Smith's lies for so long...and who pined for the impossible for so long...that was you. Ha ha ha".

It was clear - I needed a new smell, one that said, "you are New and Improved now, strong and experienced, hurtling toward a happy future, always looking ahead!".

I began like I had nearly two decades earlier: extensive smell testing at malls in my spare time. I used a seven point rating scale, and ranked and archived each sample (I used the cologne sample papers and ziplocs). I supplemented my testing by devouring information about how colognes and perfumes are made, watching documentaries, reading books and articles, and listening to and reading interviews with the world's top perfumers.

After two months, I had smelled - literally - several hundred colognes. Only a few were bad. Most ranged from good to very good, and a few were excellent (recipients of the much-coveted "7" rating). My Love Goddess especially liked Armani "Eau Pour Homme", Hermes "Terre", and Chanel "Bleu". But to my great frustration, none of them smelled like "New Me". They smelled like....someone else. Wearing them on trial days, although I am embarrassed to admit it, left me feeling like I was wearing someone else's underpants, shirt, and pants, and using their name. It was weird.

Anyway, stumped, I decided to try to create my own cologne using essential oils. Like Jerry Lewis's "Nutty Professor" in his chemistry lab, I spent hours mixing different combinations, keeping detailed notes, trying to get my concoctions exactly right. I needed "New Me". I got fairly close a few times; but in the end, all I got was "Not Me".

So my question is:

Are there any amazing, unique colognes anyone can (seriously) recommend for me, given the dynamics I've mentioned above?

Thanks!

Best Wishes,

New Me

I enjoy scents. Many times, just the faintest whiff of certain essences that are familiar takes me to places I remember from my past. Seldom, if ever do I find scents that take me to bad memories. So scents are a pleasure I choose to thoroughly enjoy.
One example recently was a waft of air that brought a scent that reminded me of canoeing on a certain lake in the Sierras. Took me on a mini-vacation for a few seconds...

As to personal or signature scents, I never could make that work. Maybe because of my heightened olfactory sense, modern life makes it impossible for me. Between shampoo, conditioner, soaps, deodorants, lotions and so on that I use regularly, there is a clash of essences already. To intentionally add another layer of scent-which would have to be bold enough to over power all of the others-is overload to me. It jangles my nose and it kills natures own essences by it's overwhelming presence.

So for me, I vote no bottled foo-foo. For me. YMMV.



Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 02/21/2015 10:19AM by csuprovograd.

I am in this category as well.

I purchase unscented toiletries when possible.

Tal, I have recently been using oils a bit. I had a lavender essential oil spray. Now I am using a spray that is mostly eucalyptus. I just really enjoy the more natural scents.

The best to you as you experiment.

~Breedum

If you haven't run across it yet, be sure to check out:

www.basenotes.net

They even have a DIY forum. Lots of hardcore fragrance nerds. Detailed reviews.

You'll freak.

Pardon my skepticism, but have you really changed enough to justify this old me versus new me scenario? Your knowledge of the church has changed, your relationships have changed, but have YOU at the core undergone any significant metamorphosis? Yes, we were all duped, but that was usually a result of not having the correct information rather than a personality defect.

Most likely you are same good person who tries his best and should be proud of who you are. I like what another poster has said, "The church has changed. I'm still the same." If you feel inclined to wear what you've always have, that's great! If you feel like you want a change, that's great too! Good luck with your decision!

I love this one. My new favorite.

http://www.stetson.com/mens/caliber-cologne-in-10-oz
This cologne is crisp, clean, and zesty, with notes of lavender, artemisia, black pepper, and red sequoia.

cologne, I thought I'd reply. I'm not even sure of the brand. I only know it used to come in a silver and blue bottle and it was "houbigant musk." A nonmormon guy I dated back in my 20s wore it. I LOVED THE STUFF. He never did tell me what it was even though I asked.

Then after I was married, I was at work one morning and the man I had been working next to for a couple of years walked in and he had that cologne on. He told me what brand it is, but I don't remember the name now. He also told me that in all his years of marriage, his wife had not once ever commented on the cologne he wore. He was really pleased I had noticed.



Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 02/21/2015 12:57PM by cl2.

I'll have to try this out.

http://www.amazon.com/s/?ie=UTF8&keywords=monsieur+houbigant+musk&tag=googhydr-20&index=aps&hvadid=57414869483&hvpos=1t1&hvexid=&hvnetw=s&hvrand=6593203821240588296&hvpone=&hvptwo=&hvqmt=b&hvdev=c&ref=pd_sl_419to4t1xs_b

reading below--some say they like a light scent, not too much.

That is what I liked about whatever brand this houbigant musk was. I remembered it had a slight lemony smell to it.

The two people I knew who wore it, it never smelled overbearing or strong.



Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 02/21/2015 01:34PM by cl2.

I just use Axe deodorant that I got at the 99 cent store in, of all places, Ventura, California!

"I don't want to smell good, I just don't want to smell bad."

I am mostly of the "I want to smell YOU!!" (the unique and personal scent of YOUR body!) school...but there have been a couple of exceptions in my life...

I grew up (adolescence and young adulthood) in the Old Spice era, and to this day Old Spice reminds me of joyous making out on grassy hillsides during warm, moonswept evenings with the smells of eucalyptus, orange blossoms, and gardenias in the air.

And fast-forwarding a few years to my later adulthood...the (to-that-particular-time) most sexual relationship of my life was with someone who always wore Kanon, and that scent became an instant flashback to a relationship that changed my life. The relationship itself didn't last long, but it did---very positively---permanently change my life, and for a split-second anyway, the unexpected smell of Kanon always flashes me back to that time in my life. (The man himself is no longer alive.)

So, those two possible exceptions aside, what I find most appealing is the clean, always totally unique, natural scent of the person I am with. To me, this is the biggest turn-on there is.

French Connection U K

Fresh, a little sweet, not overbearing, no "old man vibe" at all.

Have you tried Tabac ?

I've loved it for years. (on me, not on you) :)

http://www.basenotes.net/ID26121551.html

Also, try Neroli oil (can't find a link, mines an export from india and was a fluke purchase [???])

I liked Polo on men before I was a member, during the time I was a member, and since I've left. Maybe Hugo is just you, no matter what.

She even put some on me one time when I rolled in something delightful in the yard.

http://www.theperfumespot.com/quorum-men-puig-item-code-amquo34s.html

From research that has been performed, the consensus of female responses about male scent is that no artificial scent is best. From Sapphire's post it seems that she agrees. My wife has also told me she likes my natural odor better than if I put on a cologne.

If you like Hugo, I'd continue to buy it!
Believe me, it has nothing to do with JS. He smelled like pre-pubescent girls so you'd not ever have to worry about that.

I've worn Eternity for years. It wasn't around when I was in the CULT, but if it had been, I'd have worn it. It is just a great smelling perfume for my chemistry.

Yourself. Smell like yourself, sans masks. The new you will smell like the real you.

Now I don't mean no deodorant, just scent free deodorant. Same thing with clothing, scent free.

Any smell I have on me arises from naturally made soaps and shampoos etc. Not over the counter, big store stuff. The hand-made boutique stuff. More expensive, yes, but if it's cinnamon or honey or olive oil it is actually made from cinnamon or honey or olive oil, not some chemical that is designed to trick the olfactory system into believing something that isn't true. And isn't that what you're looking for, something real that isn't a trick?

Canmore has a good soap & bath shop, if you are ever that way. I'm sure there are all kinds of places in Vancouver or on the Island.

Best anecdote on scent:

A brush with Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie backstage goes just as you would expect [for Jennifer Lawrence].

"Brad Pitt smells amazing, like nothing I've ever smelled. Eventually we ask what cologne he's wearing and he tells us, 'I don't wear cologne, it's just my musk I guess.' I have to choose not to believe him because it would just be unfair to mankind. Angelina is gorgeous and elegant and they are like The Sun and The Moon."

I echo the scent free advice, but then I am a little biased. I look long and hard in the stores for products (deodorant, shampoo, soap, even lip balm) that are unscented. I tend to lean away from anyone wearing cologne - I hope subtly, because I don't want to offend them! I've found that as I get older, I seem more sensitive to odours and prefer to avoid anything "perfume-ish" if I can.

Regarding the comments about ‘sans perfume’, I agree. That’s why I recommended Tabac and Neroli oil. They are very, very subtle, and you use them sparingly. I’ve had comments (when I’ve divulged) that people didn’t even know I was wearing cologne, they just thought that’s how I smelled (usually only when they were close enough, like when hugging me). I only wear them to go out on the town, as part of my fancy gettup.

I never it like when that ‘old spice guy’ walks past and my eyes burn and I hold my breath until the wave passes. That’s tacky!

I was surprised to read the mentions of Neroli oil. I had never heard of it before my foray into essential oils, and it was my number one choice. Cool that others have lit upon it, too.

Yes, my wife found the Neroli one day, just on a random display, and we've never come across it again. Thanks for letting me know it's available as an essential oil, as I treasure my nearly empty bottle quite a bit (it was sold as a 'perfume'). I will look for it as an essential oil, we have a very good essential oil 'apothecary' near us. Thanks Tal.

Tal Bachman Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------

>
> Wearing them on trial days,
> although I am embarrassed to admit it, left me
> feeling like I was wearing someone else's
> underpants, shirt, and pants, and using their
> name. It was weird.
>

So in other words, you felt like a Mormon again. I can see how that's a problem.

Estée Lauder Intuition for men...best smelling cologne ever IMO. But again, it's a very individual thing. Find something you like and then wear it for a while and it will become "yours". Wife likes Fahrenheit.

The clean-smelling soap Lever 2000 is all I ever want on my man!!

Previous girlfriend picked out Light Blue by Dolce and Gabbana for me about a decade ago. I'm not sure that I think its the best but I get a lot of compliments on how good I smell, and I even smoke. I have stayed with it all these years because I hate any kind of shopping and cologne shopping is the worst. I will not change until another long term girlfriend comes along and requires the change.

It's in the range of the soapy clean type of smells, which is the only range I will deal with and it seems you always get the deal packs with it where you get deodorant, after shave cream, etc., so it's often a good deal.

If you have the money take a trip to Grasse, France and they will make you your own formula that you can keep on file and order it over and over.



Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 02/21/2015 06:36PM by templeendumbed.

Tide laundry detergent, Zest soap, and a scent free anti-antiperspirant is all you need to smell good. The only thing those stinky men's colognes do is mask your natural scent.



Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 02/21/2015 06:50PM by wine country girl.

Okay I'll splash Tide all over myself next time I go out

Wash your clothes in it, silly boy. It doesn't do any good for your body to smell good if your clothes stink.



Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 02/21/2015 07:18PM by wine country girl.

WHAT? NOW you tell me. Thanks for the bum steer!

I even drank some so that the Tide smell would ooze out my pores.

The only thing oozing out of you is smart assery.

;^)



(j/k)

you spend two hours in a store smelling colognes ?

Dolce & Gabana
Calvin Klein
Tom Ford

I prefer fresh scents over musky/spicy combos.
Also, a sort of pine/fir scent can be fantastic.

This post reminds me of Christpher Walken in the SNL sketch "The Continental." :)

LMAO...Now do you see why I didn't think your essential oils mixing was such a great idea? I'm not saying that to be mean or snarky, but it does take a serious level of skill to mix a quality scent. I remember an episode of Charm School where the women all had to mix up their colognes to sell and Mo'Nique told them they all smelled awful.

My BF doesn't wear them, although I've tried to get him to, but he's his own guy. I love the way Mary Kay's Domain smells on him. It's a woodsy scent, if you're into that sort of thing. http://www.marykay.com/en-US/Mens/Domain-Cologne-Spray/150103.partId?eCatId=10027

Eternity has always been a favourite. I used to love Polo Sport, but too many men take a French bath in the stuff.
What kind of scent do you think you would prefer? Sporty, Woodsy, Crisp, Clean?

The ingredient mix in Domain sounds intoxicating! I think I'll try that for my very outdoorsy guy!



Edited 2 time(s). Last edit at 02/21/2015 08:27PM by Sapphire.

Gio by Giorgio Armani.

I also like the Tommy Bahama colognes for men.



Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 02/21/2015 08:34PM by madalice.

Joop.

Did you sample "Creed?" One of my partners sports that stuff and all of the techs go overboard about his "smell."

My wife got me a bottle this to try because *she* liked it:

http://www.fragrantica.com/perfume/Nike/Nike-Ride-21438.html

I liked it too, so I've stuck with it. Sort of an easy-going fragrance, not overwhelming or too musky.