Posted by:
Agnes Broomhead
(
)
Date: February 23, 2015 09:15AM
I hereby report that last night a meeting at the local stake center, in which members of all its wards were persuaded (if not required) to attend, was held to herald that a local branch situated in an inner-city neighborhood is KAPUT, effective immediately, and that two other wards would absorb its members. According to the presiding stake official, the reasons were to "balance the number of Melchizedek Priesthood holders as well as seek out inactive members". Boundaries would be gerrymandered as displayed on a screen, and the members in attendance would sustain the proposal, which would be submitted to the First Presidency (I'm assuming Dieter, Hank and Uncle Tommy, right?) for a rubber-stamp.
The rearrangement resulted in bloodletting, as the bishop-pricks and those serving in callings found themselves out in the cold. The president of the dissolved branch and the bishop of one ward had their heads cut off, and they and the others released from their callings had the joy of being called to the lectern to bear their testimony. Couldn't they be given at least a gold watch or something? Copies of a list of names of members of the affected wards as well as new boundaries were passed out to the congregants. Based on counting the names listed, is it true what some say here that two-thirds of those listed as members are inactive? There did seem to be a lot of names. There's one with a very funny name but I think it's impolitic to reveal it on this message board. Anyhow.....
The same presiding official declared that attendance in all the wards combined was down 10% over the past three years. Also, it's official.....there will be a member of the Quorum of the Twelve Apostles as well as a Seventy will come to town for a stake conference next month. The bishops will get details on who it is very shortly. Anyone here could speculate on which one it is? Seems very tempting.....
Anyone have any information or stories to tell about how these ward-branch dissolutions come about would be very welcome.