Posted by:
Breeze
(
)
Date: February 28, 2015 05:13PM
I've been lurking here, and there have been some threads on how to deal with Mormon family members. The consensus is that the Mormon parts of the family seem to dominate the others. They behave aggressively in trying to convert everyone, including innocent children, yet they vilify those who try to put a stop to the recruiting. If ex or non-Mormons stand their ground--defensively, mind you--the Mormons accuse them of persecuting the poor Mormons. If an ex-Mormon says anything that can be interpreted as negative about Mormonism, he/she is thought of as "following Satan."
I think this is bullying. I've been to too many family get-togethers, where the conversations are about Relief Society, callings, missions, going to the temple, gossip about people in the ward, etc. I even hear racist and homophobic comments. A Mormon prayer is given for the food. The women all wear skirts, including me. I'm still a sheep.
Here's the kicker--in my family there are as many not-Mormons as Mormons! It is about 50-50. Yet--no one speaks up and says, "That's racist. Shut up." or "I have friends that are gay, and I resent that." Even the non-Mormon man whose wife is Mormon could say, "My children are not going on missions." They don't want to speak out, because they are polite, they are at a party, they probably like the family, and they don't want to offend anyone. (Not offend a racist?)
The Mormon dysfunction and imbalance still permeates our entire family, even though half of us have left the cult.
Maybe the Mormons don't outnumber us, but they are a solid group, whereas, non- and ex-Mormons are diversified, scattered into different religions, or are atheist, and usually in a state of flux. New ideas keep people more flexible, harder to pin down and define. They aren't fanatics. They aren't at war with anyone. So the Mormons are more dense (double entendre) single-minded, adamant, and loud. Mormons are at war against their "adversaries" (their new word for apostates). They are trained in their cult, since birth, to RECRUIT. So, why can't the rest of us at least defend ourselves and our loved ones, with impunity?
I need to get along with these people, without letting them walk all over me.
Sorry to vent, but my point is, why don't we ex-Mormons just come right out and call the Mormons on their BS? We say it with a smile, or we could disguise it in a tearful testimony of how we KNOW the Truth about Mormonism. If the Mormons can preach blatant LIES, why can't we counter with the truth? I know parents who leave the cult, yet have their children stay in it. It is the parents’ duty to tell children the TRUTH.
No one has ever asked me WHY I left. Most of the people I know don't know I've resigned. I've been cowering quietly and humbly in the corner, when I should actually be proud of my courage and integrity. I saved my children! We're truly happy, yet I even hide that, so others will feel better, and to avoid bragging.
When Mormons ask, "What is your calling?" Or say, "I haven't seen you at church lately," I want to proudly look them in the eye and tell them WHY I left (I didn't want to go out and sin) and HOW I left (I wasn't excommunicated or shunned away). I want to say:
"I resigned from the Mormon church because I don't believe in it."
What do you-all think?
If I say, "I left the Mormon cult because it's a hoax." that would be confrontational. I hope that being honest and polite might open up the conversation to sincere questions, which I would be happy to answer in a simple way, giving references. Aside from answering questions, I've learned that arguing with Mormons is counterproductive.